Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 45 Days and 77437 Haiku later...

Why yes, cows can fly
Haiku is so righteous, dude
Go wipe your asshole
Haiku # 1335, March 3, 1999 12:53 am ET
by Stanley Christians of Venus
funky fat bunny
cool tornado grass hair style
cross-eyed orgasms
Haiku # 1334, March 2, 1999 4:15 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
Ugly Fat Chick in Princeton
Eating Greasy Pizza
Farting Haiku
Haiku # 1333, March 2, 1999 2:52 pm ET
by johnny waddnyc, usa
never eat lettuce
when you suffer from the shits
it will ache your guts
Haiku # 1332, March 2, 1999 9:03 am ET
by wilf o'hairy diddles of hull, england
full mental jacket
caps lock and load your ravings
but haiku it ain't
Haiku # 1331, March 1, 1999 5:18 pm ET
by ash
feel free to post them
(your childish, inane rantings)
but please don't SCREAM them
Haiku # 1330, March 1, 1999 1:01 am ET
by squish
vacuous, mindless
Clueless, boring, stupid tripe
better post it twice
Haiku # 1329, February 28, 1999 3:55 pm ET
by dumbfuck of soddomy, gomorrah
HOW WE SIT AND THINKWHERE DO WE GET?iMGANATIONS FLYbUT WHERE DO THEY GO?TO ANOTHER WORLD OR PLANET?DO WE CARE?OF COURSE WE DOWHERE WOULD WE BEIF NO ONE WAS THINKING?NOWHERESO WHERE DO WE GO?SOMEWHERE RIGHT!HOW DO WE GET THERE?I AM NOT SURE!WHY DO WE GO?WE
Haiku # 1328, February 26, 1999 1:27 pm ET
by NATE MALLI of crofton, usa
HOW WE SIT AND THINKWHERE DO WE GET?iMGANATIONS FLYbUT WHERE DO THEY GO?TO ANOTHER WORLD OR PLANET?DO WE CARE?OF COURSE WE DOWHERE WOULD WE BEIF NO ONE WAS THINKING?NOWHERESO WHERE DO WE GO?SOMEWHERE RIGHT!HOW DO WE GET THERE?I AM NOT SURE!WHY DO WE GO?WE
Haiku # 1327, February 26, 1999 1:27 pm ET
by NATE MALLI of crofton, usa
SUDDENESS IT STILLLIFE HAS CHANGEDBUT FOR WHAT? A CHILDCHANGE IN LIFEFOR A CHILDWILL BE BORN
Haiku # 1326, February 26, 1999 1:14 pm ET
by NATE MALLI of CROFTON, USA
i could break your backmy scrotum is on your facei could break your back
Haiku # 1325, February 26, 1999 7:45 am ET
by spring chicken and walter of hull, england
i could break your backi have no nosehair at alli could break your back
Haiku # 1324, February 26, 1999 7:39 am ET
by spring chicken of hull, england
a weird paradox
tragedy is ev'rywhere
and happiness too
Haiku # 1323, February 26, 1999 7:05 am ET
by ash
let me get that right
reality is a toad
sucking on your head
Haiku # 1322, February 26, 1999 6:32 am ET
by ash
what you lack in style
you certainly make up for
with drama and wit
Haiku # 1321, February 26, 1999 12:06 am ET
by Thunder Stork
So don't you tell me
'bout how reality sucks
It can't get much worse
Haiku # 1320, February 25, 1999 10:32 pm ET
by Jane
Friend died in car wreck
Another tried suicide
That has been my week
Haiku # 1319, February 25, 1999 10:30 pm ET
by Jane
reality sits
like a ridiculous toad
on your little head
Haiku # 1318, February 25, 1999 3:06 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
I too can write rhyme
I just needed some more time
Perhaps to try mime
Haiku # 1317, February 25, 1999 1:08 pm ET
by JanePrinceton, USA
OldNasty is cool
why do you spaz out so much?
I should do homework
Haiku # 1316, February 25, 1999 12:09 pm ET
by Lugenius Speed
my mom and her pets
won't answer my damn phone calls
i still need a loan
your ghost means we work
Haiku # 1315, February 25, 1999 1:51 am ET
by oldnasty of ukiah, usa
StanLee you're manly
ground beef needs your ritual
your ghost means we work
Haiku # 1314, February 25, 1999 1:47 am ET
by oldnasty of ukiah, usa
lameness is lameness
and to rhyme would be shameless
and oh! So...Janeless
Haiku # 1313, February 25, 1999 1:44 am ET
by oldnasty of ukiah, usa
rain rain rain rain rain
rain rain rain rain rain rain rain
sydney is like that
Haiku # 1312, February 24, 1999 6:32 am ET
by ash
frisky phrost is lame
hmm, but is lame good or bad?
I need to go shit
Haiku # 1311, February 23, 1999 5:34 pm ET
by StanLee Christians of Arcata, Wierdistan
o chilly willy
haiku sucks a diff'rent way
go inhale a phart
Haiku # 1310, February 23, 1999 5:11 am ET
by ash
hiakus can suck my phat cock
Haiku # 1309, February 22, 1999 8:25 pm ET
by phrost of shit, usa
Benji is my pal
he was very bored today
no skating was done
Haiku # 1308, February 21, 1999 12:36 am ET
by Frumpycrab USA
I need a break from
Fucking reality 'cause
It really blows now.
Haiku # 1307, February 19, 1999 12:15 pm ET
by JanePrinceton, USA
another pecker
silent wind breaks from my ass
computer lab stinks
Haiku # 1306, February 18, 1999 8:39 pm ET
by StanLee Christians of Arcata, Afghanistan
DULL JOURNAL
Come to dull journal
A real stupid adventure
This, a shameless ad.
Haiku # 1305, February 18, 1999 8:31 pm ET
by Stanley Christians of Arcata, USA
hot wool everywhere
my balls smell like burnt lamb chops
mint jelly soaked sheets
Haiku # 1304, February 18, 1999 10:29 am ET
by Hollywood Bonfire
Your sheepish grin speaks
volumes, and we all know that
you're a baaaaaad liar.
Haiku # 1303, February 18, 1999 9:13 am ET
by Intern
that sheep never lies
standing there now, back to you
dripping evidence
Haiku # 1302, February 18, 1999 1:49 am ET
by squish
You can't prove a thing
No one can prove what happened
The sheep are liars!
Haiku # 1301, February 17, 1999 11:52 pm ET
by nunya bidness of Houston,
Romantic haikus
Have a place here but they must,
Of Course, suck out loud.
Haiku # 1300, February 17, 1999 8:19 pm ET
by Reverend Jim
Happy birthday Steve
Tomorrow is your big day
Get drunk off your ass
Haiku # 1299, February 17, 1999 4:17 pm ET
by JanePrinceton, USA
Fuck off dear bastard
Extraordinary dickhead
Take quarter, buy life
Haiku # 1298, February 17, 1999 4:15 pm ET
by JanePrinceton, USA
In the morning I
have a shitty voice that's great
for calling in sick.
Haiku # 1297, February 17, 1999 11:30 am ET
by Intern
There once was a Jane
in whose pocket I'd love to
blast off my rocket
Haiku # 1296, February 17, 1999 10:26 am ET
by squish
There once was a Jane
from Princeton who'd sit on my
face and smoke Winstons
Haiku # 1295, February 17, 1999 10:02 am ET
by squish
There once was a Jane
from Nantucket who's clit was
so fine I'd suck it
Haiku # 1294, February 17, 1999 9:58 am ET
by squish
There once was a guy
Who instead of limericks
Wrote me love haikus
Haiku # 1293, February 17, 1999 12:59 am ET
by JanePrinceton, USA
hygiene and pizza
the anguish of bad acne
they bring the deep dish
Haiku # 1292, February 16, 1999 5:00 pm ET
by oldnasty of usa
my aching lungs wheeze
no money for the gas bill
need fresh bongwater
Haiku # 1291, February 16, 1999 4:57 pm ET
by oldnasty of usa
if we had women
we could have some hot tub sex
if we had hot tub
Haiku # 1290, February 15, 1999 11:55 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
thank you very much
a queen size bed means more room
for sex with myself
Haiku # 1289, February 15, 1999 11:53 pm ET
by Thunder Stork
OK, I dont mind
Its my pleasure to do them
I love the dishes
Haiku # 1288, February 15, 1999 3:51 am ET
by TimDunedin, NZ
Sometimes I wonder:
How much ejaculated,
Any night on Earth?
Haiku # 1287, February 15, 1999 3:45 am ET
by Tim of Dunedin, NZ
Toasted cheese sandwich
A Noblemans invention
Ow Fuck! burnt my lip.
Haiku # 1286, February 15, 1999 3:44 am ET
by Tim of Dunedin, NZ