Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
26 Years, 133 Days and 76395 Haiku later...

WOKE is WEAK, feel me?
Some people ain't down wif it.
(Vowels notwithstanding).
Haiku # 76327, February 26, 2023 2:31 pm ET
by Wokery INC. of I Have a Dream Today
Peep be like: I'm woke
(Then fall asleep at dawn.) Damn.
Y'all sleep well, bitches.
Haiku # 76326, February 26, 2023 2:25 pm ET
by Equity in Inclusion of Diversity in Perversity
Time 2 git WOKE, y'all:
brush yo teeth, put on jammies
and git in tha bed.
Haiku # 76325, February 26, 2023 2:23 pm ET
by Awakener of Black Awareness Century
My woman so woke
She slept right thru a daydream...
and a nightmare. Word.
Haiku # 76324, February 26, 2023 2:19 pm ET
by Slumbers of the Slept
Girl, you woke. MAD woke.
I bought you an alarm clock
cuz you so woke. Unh.
Haiku # 76323, February 26, 2023 10:27 am ET
by Wakey Wakey of Rhodesia, Zimbabwe
Girl, you are so woke.
You so woke you overslept.
Now it's tomorrow.
Haiku # 76322, February 26, 2023 10:11 am ET
by Woke-ass Booji of Wakefield, NJ
You're welcome, I'm here
In paradise freezing on
Waiting for the parade.
Haiku # 76321, February 25, 2023 10:09 pm ET
by Vhs
janis set us up
bad haiku is still the bomb
all our base belong
Haiku # 76319, February 25, 2023 8:57 pm ET
by ash of the rock steady crew
and we have an ai
for the sensible post in
these senseless times, yup
Haiku # 76318, February 25, 2023 11:10 am ET
by vhs
Fugpicker got picked...
Captain of the hockey team.
Figpucker got pucked.
Haiku # 76314, February 23, 2023 8:09 pm ET
by Notional Hokey League of Frankfurt, Zimbabwe with Onions
Fig Parker got parked
In illegal loading zone
But he's feeling fined...
Haiku # 76313, February 23, 2023 7:48 pm ET
by Par King of Violation
This sad joyless world
Is the pig farker still here?
In this joyless world?
Haiku # 76312, February 23, 2023 6:11 pm ET
by Mox of Waiting for godot.
Ozzys back was out
I hate to hear prince of. Darkness
Is getting old
Haiku # 76311, February 22, 2023 11:11 pm ET
by Mox
Cough cough Janis has
Kept a safe space for words best
Posted state of grace.
Haiku # 76310, February 22, 2023 10:23 pm ET
by Mox
Spry old Mox so dear,
Bath awaits, renewal near,
Life's spark shines so clear.
Haiku # 76309, February 22, 2023 8:20 pm ET
by West of Tempe, AZ
Yes old mox is here
Too, quite alive, on bed now
Going to shower
Haiku # 76308, February 22, 2023 2:50 pm ET
by Mox
Jolly Green Giant
Standing erect in corn fields
Here comes the cream corn
Haiku # 76307, February 21, 2023 8:15 am ET
by I. Dig
Over the shoulder
Boulder-holder gets older
As you get colder.
Haiku # 76306, February 18, 2023 8:53 pm ET
by Bolder Colorado of Wyoming
There’s no support here
Take a look at my brassiere
You are on your own
Haiku # 76305, February 18, 2023 7:04 pm ET
by Anonymous poet of Sag Harbor
Hello! How to contact support?
Haiku # 76304, February 18, 2023 6:52 am ET
by KevinDop of Latvia
Pentagon demons
and Central Intelli-gents:
Malthusians all.
Haiku # 76303, February 17, 2023 10:46 pm ET
by Never Tire of Starting WARS
I watched the Super
Bowl. That is it; that is the
entire haiku
Haiku # 76300, February 14, 2023 9:04 am ET
by It's Re-anna not Re-ahnah
Seeing the old names
from the website's early days
glad you're all alive.
Haiku # 76299, February 14, 2023 9:00 am ET
by Janis of the Fediverse
Workday drags along,
Elon's tweets now a distraction,
Boss will not be pleased.
Haiku # 76296, February 13, 2023 11:56 pm ET
by Hannes of Japan
Deadlines fast approach,
Endless tasks still left undone,
Netflix beckons me
Haiku # 76295, February 13, 2023 11:55 pm ET
by Hannes of Japan
Today I’m just a figment of ChatGPT’s
Imagination
Haiku # 76293, February 13, 2023 1:10 am ET
by Betty LeBomb
Is this really real?
or was it ChatGPT
that invented us?
Haiku # 76292, February 13, 2023 1:08 am ET
by Betty LeBomb
The universal
Gas cloud carrying with it
Primordial fart...

IA IA old fart, the ancient gas of 1000 tacos
Haiku # 76290, February 11, 2023 6:03 pm ET
by I got 99 problems but hastur ain't one of Aka moxie
i thought haiku was
about syllables arranged...
or some shit like that.
Haiku # 76289, February 10, 2023 7:33 pm ET
by Existential Idiot of Poughkeepsie, NY
petrichor rises
as the dark grey sky rumbles
and the dog freaks out
Haiku # 76288, February 8, 2023 11:31 pm ET
by ash of thunderdome
Death of irony
Sarah Huckabee Sanders
You killed it last night
Haiku # 76287, February 8, 2023 8:34 am ET
by Crazy is as crazy does
Universal poop
Cook Islands are farther east
But, you have to die.
Haiku # 76286, February 7, 2023 3:25 pm ET
by Haiku Collage of Kollaboration
lack of empathy
exudes like a miasma
but you can't see it
Haiku # 76285, February 6, 2023 9:37 pm ET
by ash
salamat pagi
cook islands are further east
spam jalan-jalan
Haiku # 76283, February 5, 2023 4:42 pm ET
by ash of diverse travels
Universal poop
In old grandpa's chicken coop
Let's make us some soup
Haiku # 76280, February 5, 2023 12:50 am ET
by Julia Childish
Join the Wagner group
They can solve prison problems
But, you have to die.
Haiku # 76279, February 3, 2023 2:46 pm ET
by Pootins Chef
I'm wanting to lose
My mind at the prison playpen
Closing us in
Haiku # 76278, February 3, 2023 10:57 am ET
by Mox
can't just push one out
poetic constipation
a pain in the arts
Haiku # 76277, February 2, 2023 7:46 am ET
by ash
Risk-free existence:
That's all these neurotics want,
Whimpering in fear...
Haiku # 76276, February 2, 2023 6:27 am ET
by Evel Knevel of Snake River Knitting Club
Unfriendly pi-time
A faithful, pretty dog trots
in spite of the worm
Haiku # 76275, February 1, 2023 2:10 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Pleasant eventide
A smoky computer sits
beyond the girlfriend
Haiku # 76274, February 1, 2023 2:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Paul was Jewish too;
He managed banking assets
For the Lord of Hosts.
Haiku # 76273, February 1, 2023 1:46 pm ET
by Gamaliel of Tarsus
Jesus was Jewish.
Kept Sabbath and wore strange hats;
ate gefilte fish.
Haiku # 76272, January 31, 2023 7:27 pm ET
by He was from Brooklyn dontcha know
Sit down, brace yourself....
Jesus was not a white guy
Just thought you should know
Haiku # 76271, January 31, 2023 8:51 am ET
by I know....but you seen pictures of him
Klaus Schwab: kiss my ass.
God exists and you are done.
You are so over.
Haiku # 76270, January 29, 2023 9:35 pm ET
by Angela Merkel of Bratwurst
bothered by the trolls?
you should try "internet off"
see them disappear
Haiku # 76268, January 28, 2023 8:09 am ET
by ash of the fine solution
So, which sin is worse:
To be homosexual
Or to be white. Hmmm?
Haiku # 76267, January 27, 2023 1:47 pm ET
by Gay Caucasian But I Identify as Straight Asian
Life is like texting
Before the red light changes
And they start honking.
Haiku # 76265, January 23, 2023 8:15 am ET
by Existential Awareness of Traffic Lights
Swollen infection
Swollen infection Swollen
Swollen infection
Haiku # 76264, January 22, 2023 7:46 am ET
by Bulge of Nether Regions
Stolen election
Stolen election Stolen
Stolen election
Haiku # 76263, January 21, 2023 6:19 pm ET
by If you repeat it enough. Dumb shits will believe
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