Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
26 Years, 317 Days and 76713 Haiku later...

Seeing the old names
from the website's early days
glad you're all alive.
Haiku # 76299, February 14, 2023 9:00 am ET
by Janis of the Fediverse
Workday drags along,
Elon's tweets now a distraction,
Boss will not be pleased.
Haiku # 76296, February 13, 2023 11:56 pm ET
by Hannes of Japan
Deadlines fast approach,
Endless tasks still left undone,
Netflix beckons me
Haiku # 76295, February 13, 2023 11:55 pm ET
by Hannes of Japan
Today I’m just a figment of ChatGPT’s
Haiku # 76293, February 13, 2023 1:10 am ET
by Betty LeBomb
Is this really real?
or was it ChatGPT
that invented us?
Haiku # 76292, February 13, 2023 1:08 am ET
by Betty LeBomb
The universal
Gas cloud carrying with it
Primordial fart...

IA IA old fart, the ancient gas of 1000 tacos
Haiku # 76290, February 11, 2023 6:03 pm ET
by I got 99 problems but hastur ain't one of Aka moxie
i thought haiku was
about syllables arranged...
or some shit like that.
Haiku # 76289, February 10, 2023 7:33 pm ET
by Existential Idiot of Poughkeepsie, NY
petrichor rises
as the dark grey sky rumbles
and the dog freaks out
Haiku # 76288, February 8, 2023 11:31 pm ET
by ash of thunderdome
Death of irony
Sarah Huckabee Sanders
You killed it last night
Haiku # 76287, February 8, 2023 8:34 am ET
by Crazy is as crazy does
Universal poop
Cook Islands are farther east
But, you have to die.
Haiku # 76286, February 7, 2023 3:25 pm ET
by Haiku Collage of Kollaboration
lack of empathy
exudes like a miasma
but you can't see it
Haiku # 76285, February 6, 2023 9:37 pm ET
by ash
salamat pagi
cook islands are further east
spam jalan-jalan
Haiku # 76283, February 5, 2023 4:42 pm ET
by ash of diverse travels
Universal poop
In old grandpa's chicken coop
Let's make us some soup
Haiku # 76280, February 5, 2023 12:50 am ET
by Julia Childish
Join the Wagner group
They can solve prison problems
But, you have to die.
Haiku # 76279, February 3, 2023 2:46 pm ET
by Pootins Chef
I'm wanting to lose
My mind at the prison playpen
Closing us in
Haiku # 76278, February 3, 2023 10:57 am ET
by Mox
can't just push one out
poetic constipation
a pain in the arts
Haiku # 76277, February 2, 2023 7:46 am ET
by ash
Risk-free existence:
That's all these neurotics want,
Whimpering in fear...
Haiku # 76276, February 2, 2023 6:27 am ET
by Evel Knevel of Snake River Knitting Club
Unfriendly pi-time
A faithful, pretty dog trots
in spite of the worm
Haiku # 76275, February 1, 2023 2:10 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Pleasant eventide
A smoky computer sits
beyond the girlfriend
Haiku # 76274, February 1, 2023 2:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Paul was Jewish too;
He managed banking assets
For the Lord of Hosts.
Haiku # 76273, February 1, 2023 1:46 pm ET
by Gamaliel of Tarsus
Jesus was Jewish.
Kept Sabbath and wore strange hats;
ate gefilte fish.
Haiku # 76272, January 31, 2023 7:27 pm ET
by He was from Brooklyn dontcha know
Sit down, brace yourself....
Jesus was not a white guy
Just thought you should know
Haiku # 76271, January 31, 2023 8:51 am ET
by I know....but you seen pictures of him
Klaus Schwab: kiss my ass.
God exists and you are done.
You are so over.
Haiku # 76270, January 29, 2023 9:35 pm ET
by Angela Merkel of Bratwurst
bothered by the trolls?
you should try "internet off"
see them disappear
Haiku # 76268, January 28, 2023 8:09 am ET
by ash of the fine solution
So, which sin is worse:
To be homosexual
Or to be white. Hmmm?
Haiku # 76267, January 27, 2023 1:47 pm ET
by Gay Caucasian But I Identify as Straight Asian
Life is like texting
Before the red light changes
And they start honking.
Haiku # 76265, January 23, 2023 8:15 am ET
by Existential Awareness of Traffic Lights
Swollen infection
Swollen infection Swollen
Swollen infection
Haiku # 76264, January 22, 2023 7:46 am ET
by Bulge of Nether Regions
Stolen election
Stolen election Stolen
Stolen election
Haiku # 76263, January 21, 2023 6:19 pm ET
by If you repeat it enough. Dumb shits will believe
Cephalopod wink
Eight tentacles grip Darth’s dink
whilst he sips his drink
Haiku # 76262, January 20, 2023 9:34 am ET
by Gossip of The Sea
Old moxie never
Really left here, he just got
To see the world change
Haiku # 76261, January 19, 2023 11:14 pm ET
by Mox
I must post haiku
In order to trigger bots
Like "Darth" and "Janis".
Haiku # 76260, January 19, 2023 7:04 pm ET
by Noticer of HaikuBots
I must post haiku
In order to trigger bots
Like "Darth" and "Janis".
Haiku # 76259, January 19, 2023 7:04 pm ET
by Noticer of HaikuBots
Napalm in Japan:
Used in nineteen forty-five...
Long before Viet Nam.
Haiku # 76258, January 13, 2023 8:27 pm ET
by Chemical Warfare of Harvard U.
Darth died a while back.
Do you know where he's buried?
He used to post here...
Haiku # 76257, January 13, 2023 7:31 pm ET
by Executor of Figpucker's Estate
One of Darth’s cheese farts
Clear your nasal passages
Can you taste it now?
Haiku # 76255, January 9, 2023 2:33 am ET
by Dr. Limburger of Philippines
I just had Covid.
It wasn't bad, but taste buds
Are not functioning.
Haiku # 76254, January 8, 2023 9:36 pm ET
by Even Coffee and Beer Have No Taste
Every time I pee
Near Darth experiences
Then I wake up wet
Haiku # 76252, January 8, 2023 1:10 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Twenty twenty-three:
Near Death Experiences,
Party tricks, and beer.
Haiku # 76251, January 7, 2023 2:13 pm ET
by Noticer of Beer
Off to a great start
Grand republican shit show
What did you expect?
Haiku # 76250, January 6, 2023 9:37 am ET
by The ghost of John McCain
Chatbots can now guide
Toward a world without conflict:
Haiku # 76249, January 6, 2023 12:08 am ET
by Global Pabulum of Nanny Superstate
croak croak croak croak croak
ribbit ribbit ribbit croak
croak croak Cloaca!
Haiku # 76248, January 4, 2023 4:13 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
holy shit batman
quarter of a century
basho would be proud
Haiku # 76247, January 4, 2023 7:00 am ET
by ash of what is the sound of one frog crapping?
I see posts from those
Places I did not recall
Hey there's trinidad
Haiku # 76246, January 3, 2023 10:41 am ET
by Mox
A haiku a day
Won't keep the doctor away
Still... write anyway
Haiku # 76244, January 3, 2023 12:42 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
The slow stream of verse
Unpopular is the way
Obscurity wins
Haiku # 76243, January 2, 2023 10:30 am ET
by Janis of Happy New Year my friends!
My gift this new year
Is something I know you want
Tom Bosley's penis
Haiku # 76242, January 1, 2023 12:41 am ET
by You're welcome
twenty twenty three
happy new year lolita
you're only young once
Haiku # 76241, December 31, 2022 11:13 pm ET
by ash of of older for a long time
New year up to you
To be happy, we write on
The walls here we go
Haiku # 76240, December 31, 2022 3:47 pm ET
by Mox
another year gone
just one day closer to death
party while you can
Haiku # 76238, December 31, 2022 2:55 am ET
by ash of dust to dust
Just understand this:
Cheese is not the enemy
Punctuation is
Haiku # 76237, December 30, 2022 9:48 pm ET
by Velvety smooth fondue
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