Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
25 Years, 324 Days and 76089 Haiku later...

dr seuss...seuss and de
sist, not sure what a seuss im
pression would be like

like a bike
a trike?

on strike?

tv once called Spike.

dams being called dikes.
Haiku # 73629, November 15, 2021 11:20 am ET
by vhs
We'll soon bow down to
The Cannibal Overlords!
Worse than aliens!
Haiku # 73628, November 15, 2021 11:08 am ET
by Alferd Packer of Shpadoinkle!
The culling will start.
Only the fat ones may breed.
They are so juicy!
Haiku # 73627, November 15, 2021 11:06 am ET
by Artificial selection.
Will we be cattle?
"They" will harvest our fat selves.
Drugged, we will not know.
Haiku # 73626, November 15, 2021 11:04 am ET
by moooooooo
The future I see.
Plugged in, we never leave home.
Just like The Matrix.
Haiku # 73625, November 15, 2021 11:01 am ET
by But voluntary. of Amazon and Facebook.
Amazon order.
You ever try Vulveeta?
Fake vagina cheese.
Haiku # 73624, November 15, 2021 10:55 am ET
by You can order anything these days! of We need a new crypto called "ShitCoin".
The fox pox pine box???
That bothered you??? I'm sorry.
I was just goofing.

Bet you wear cute socks.
Haiku # 73623, November 15, 2021 10:51 am ET
by Darth Whorendous
I am not fighting.
I notice Noticer knows
my identity.

"I will kill you if you tell."
meaning he/she/it know me personally.
The "dead rabbit" line gave it away.
Along with a million other not so subtle hints.
We will see, we will see.
Haiku # 73622, November 15, 2021 10:46 am ET
by Darth Whorendous of No long plucking figs, and thank God for that!
Darth, you need a hug
Stop fighting with the poets
I made you decaf
Haiku # 73621, November 15, 2021 10:16 am ET
by One of the other poets
i think some seek a
great savior only to find
in this world it's fake
Haiku # 73620, November 15, 2021 10:08 am ET
by vhs
i would like to see
more people on this site post
different haiku
Haiku # 73619, November 15, 2021 10:04 am ET
by vhs
i know I've just got
to walk out that door and get
the fresh air of the

pines and fall and call
it a real walk and not a space
for cyber highways
Haiku # 73618, November 15, 2021 10:00 am ET
by vhs
I'm glad you're still here
I almost ended up in a
box, worked out, still

going strong, heart health just
might save lives after all, weird
how we all turn out...
Haiku # 73617, November 15, 2021 9:59 am ET
by vhs
This site had a troll
From '03-'17
I will outlast you
Haiku # 73616, November 15, 2021 9:55 am ET
by Janis of That must be a record!
usually when it's
about me dying i might
take it personal.
Haiku # 73615, November 15, 2021 9:44 am ET
by vhs
dude, it's stuff like that
that made me leave here and stop
posting haiku here.
Haiku # 73614, November 15, 2021 9:43 am ET
by vhs
Mox stocks rocks fox pox.
It put him in a pine box.
Bagels, cream cheese, lox.
Haiku # 73613, November 15, 2021 9:29 am ET
by I am not Sam. I will eat green eggs and ham. of It's Ma'am! (I notice you assume to much.)
well this is a drat
a bother, shows how old we
are facebook a dream
Haiku # 73612, November 15, 2021 8:47 am ET
by vhs of im usually mox too
300 hits to this site each day.
297 are bots.
1 is Janis trying to delete the bot spam.
The others are the only 2 poets posting here under multiple names pretending to be different people.
Haiku # 73611, November 15, 2021 7:15 am ET
by Good job!
If the Axis won,
I bet there'd be no balot
in the Philippines.
Haiku # 73610, November 15, 2021 7:08 am ET
by Even the Nippers aren't that nasty.
Thunderbird, Night Train,
Mad Dog Twenty-Twenty.
Brand name, not vintage.

Vintage ghetto wine.
Now THAT is fucking funny.
Pairs with Velveeta.
Haiku # 73609, November 15, 2021 6:57 am ET
by I Noticed your yellow lips. of OH! That's from crack. Okay.
If the Axis won,
these Russian boner pill ads
could well be poo porn.
Haiku # 73608, November 15, 2021 6:52 am ET
by Things could always be worse.
Beaujolais red wine.
Two-thousand-fifteen is good.
Pairs well with hookers.

And sharp cheddar.
Haiku # 73607, November 15, 2021 6:48 am ET
by Right!
Germany/Japan.
They make the disgusting porn
US frat boy watch.
Haiku # 73605, November 15, 2021 6:42 am ET
by $upply & demand.
Okay, let's talk wine.
That's way more appropriate.
What's your favorite?
Haiku # 73604, November 15, 2021 6:39 am ET
by What's a famous Jewish wine? of "I want to go to Hawaii!"... Oh, I thought you said whine.
I cannot fathom
enjoying being pooed on.
Explain Noticer.
Haiku # 73603, November 15, 2021 6:36 am ET
by What's that do for you?
The sewers are fun.
Did you notice me in the
toilet hole waiting.
Haiku # 73602, November 15, 2021 6:33 am ET
by Oh, wait, no... that's Germany. Maybe Japan. of Why are the WWII axis powers such epic perverts?
He brewed a bad brew
of Hebrew Manischewitz.
Man, it was the shits.
Haiku # 73601, November 15, 2021 6:29 am ET
by vhs... NOT of ;-)
A knock at the door
A single knock followed by
sixteen rapid knocks
Haiku # 73600, November 15, 2021 2:42 am ET
by Salesman of Haiku
Haiku supply chain
The source of all bad haiku
Philippines sewers
Haiku # 73599, November 15, 2021 1:48 am ET
by Eel of Sargasso (source of good haiku)
Just write what you know
Poems about cutting cheese
and blaming the dog
Haiku # 73598, November 15, 2021 1:32 am ET
by Hound of Limburger
I had idea
For epic haiku poem...
But it was garbage.
Haiku # 73597, November 15, 2021 12:04 am ET
by Flash in the Pan
Moxie is a brew.
But is he a hebrew brew?
Or a mere beverage?
Haiku # 73596, November 14, 2021 11:42 pm ET
by Israel of God
Kill the red heifer.
The levitical priesthood.
The law of Moses.
Haiku # 73595, November 14, 2021 11:36 pm ET
by Sodom and Egypt of Revelation
Oy veh.. Yom Kippur.
Gefilte fish and matzoh.
Wait for third temple.
Haiku # 73594, November 14, 2021 11:31 pm ET
by The Rebbe of Mendel Schneerson
Ah yeah Darth this Darth
That. ...keep firing assholes, a
Drewish princess? Oi.
Haiku # 73593, November 14, 2021 11:06 pm ET
by Vhs
Darth is a drag queen
Hiding out in Phillipeen.
To hell with his soul.
Haiku # 73592, November 14, 2021 10:47 pm ET
by Unconditional Love of Jeeeebus
Hey Darth: eat your sperm.
We are so tired of you.
Go jerk off again.
Haiku # 73591, November 14, 2021 10:06 pm ET
by Into your Sea Monkees tank of Yaaaawwwnnnn....
his last day of life
was spent in our back garden
watching bees at work
Haiku # 73589, November 14, 2021 7:28 pm ET
by scotch of missing someone fuzzy
Ejaculation
discreetly shipped to your door
in a cardboard box
Haiku # 73588, November 14, 2021 7:17 pm ET
by Jeff Bezos of If it fits, it ships
Thunderbirds are GO!
I used to live for that show.
Don't know Thundercats..
Haiku # 73587, November 14, 2021 1:31 pm ET
by Mummra's Scoutmaster of Gay Olde Time
Indonesian trash:
We took a big load right there.
(Our little servers)
Haiku # 73586, November 14, 2021 1:15 pm ET
by Java Junk of Jakartit Away
Dehydrated jizz
Packaged like cup-o- noodles
without the noodles
Haiku # 73583, November 14, 2021 12:43 pm ET
by Alexa of Sea monkeys jizz factor
If we get famous,
can your little servers take
a big load like that?
Haiku # 73582, November 14, 2021 12:10 pm ET
by Soon I think. Within 3 months.
Much in the same way
we destroyed the Amazon,
it's destroying us.
Haiku # 73581, November 14, 2021 12:07 pm ET
by Oh good! My order of Sea Monkey jizz extract just arrived!
I think Jeff Bezos
is buying up Hawaii.
So, yeah, possible.
Haiku # 73580, November 14, 2021 10:25 am ET
by What would you do if you owned the world? of Start a pandemic?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.
Every is TWO syllables.
Don't say "ever-ree".
Haiku # 73579, November 14, 2021 10:23 am ET
by Webster's plaid pants.
fantasy island
i wonder if anyone
asked the caretaker

my fantasy is
to have an island like yours
can you do this sir?
Haiku # 73578, November 14, 2021 10:21 am ET
by vhs of ze plane ze plane!
Scooby Doo is dumb.
Same effing plot every week.
But I'd bang Velma.
Haiku # 73577, November 14, 2021 10:18 am ET
by Right.
"Thundercats!" (times three).
Mummra's homosexual;
still in the closet.
Haiku # 73576, November 14, 2021 10:15 am ET
by Not a very good villain if you ask me. of And such stupid minions.
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