Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years, 314 Days and 72142 Haikus later...

How many midgets
have died from COVID-19?
Explain your answer
Haiku # 71993, September 14, 2021 3:59 am ET
by Quiz
Ok, that makes sense
The third leg is the problem
That one has a limp
Haiku # 71992, September 14, 2021 3:56 am ET
by Noticer of Defective Triskelion
I've been to England
Never eaten spotted dick
but I've heard of it
Haiku # 71991, September 14, 2021 3:52 am ET
by If you have spotted Dick of You might be a cheetah
I do not have spots.
Nor do I have any stripes.
I have all three legs.

But there's a problem.
I seem to have misplaced my
prosthetic sphincter.
Haiku # 71990, September 14, 2021 2:47 am ET
by Actually, it's bionic. of Cost 6 million dollars.
Amputated leg
Possessed by evil spirits
Call priest if spotted
Haiku # 71989, September 14, 2021 2:38 am ET
by PSA of Emergency Broadcast
I've been banging goats.
Hoping to get the Nipah.
And pass it to you.
Haiku # 71988, September 14, 2021 2:26 am ET
by Blahblahblah
If you have covid,
go out and spread it around.
Get this over with!

Hand railings, door knobs,
elevator buttons and
shopping mall food stands.
Haiku # 71987, September 14, 2021 2:22 am ET
by Do your duty!
Wear a bondage mask.
Make disease kinky again.
Be a bug hunter.
Haiku # 71986, September 14, 2021 2:09 am ET
by STDs and Pokemon. of Gotta catch 'em all!
Hey, wear a clown mask
Let's make Covid fun again
Turn frowns upside down

Prescribe silly string
More farting competitions
More Kardashians

Bring back fake vomit
Rubber chickens, Silly Putty
Unprotected sex

Free ice cream for all!
Midgets on every corner
Life is beautiful
Haiku # 71985, September 13, 2021 9:23 pm ET
by Sara Tonen of Your Happy Place
Balut McMuffin
You deserve a beak today
McDarthnold's Restaurant
Haiku # 71984, September 13, 2021 3:17 pm ET
by Clown of Huge Feet. No pants.
Camel pedicures
Haiku # 71983, September 13, 2021 3:10 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet of funny bone
Will die for country
But I will not wear a mask
That's too much to ask
Haiku # 71982, September 13, 2021 2:42 pm ET
by Confused patriot virtue signal
If your dink is pointing South
Put this in your mouth
Haiku # 71981, September 13, 2021 2:16 pm ET
by Brought to you by the Balut Egg Commission of Sunny Philippines
Morning camel ride
Combined stench of man and beast
and we're still in bed
Haiku # 71980, September 13, 2021 1:43 pm ET
by Postcards from D Figpucker of Employment Abroad
And they drink coffee.
And they own lots of women.
And they blow stuff up.
Haiku # 71979, September 13, 2021 10:51 am ET
by What more could you ask for?!
Baklava versus
Balaclava (a face-mask)
Terrorists do both !
Haiku # 71978, September 13, 2021 10:26 am ET
by Friendly Hamas Pastry Chef of BOOM!
Well that's no problem.
I'm sure camels don't have hands.
That's an easy job!
Haiku # 71977, September 13, 2021 9:16 am ET
by Silly Arabs, Trix are for kids. of Kids as in juvenile goats
The Job Description:
You will be responsible
for camel hand jobs
Haiku # 71976, September 13, 2021 7:43 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
They're so welcoming.
They said come on down and join.
Darth torture expert.

Maybe bomb maker.
Or heroin smuggler.
Chemical warfare?

Chef and gardener.
Cave hideout decorator.
Camel pedicures.
Haiku # 71975, September 13, 2021 6:16 am ET
by I can do it all!
You will be welcome
most anywhere you travel
because you're so cute
Haiku # 71974, September 13, 2021 4:21 am ET
by Fortune Cookie of Old Willow Take Out
Will the Taliban
accept me if I go there?
Looks like lots of fun!

Full auto rifles.
Rocket launchers and grenades.
Oh, and land mines too!

And roller coasters,
Ferris wheels, haunted house,
and the bumper cars!

And I hear free coffee.
Like what more could you ask for?
And balklava too?!
Haiku # 71973, September 13, 2021 3:46 am ET
by I am so there!
So some people die.
Who thinks covid's overblown?
We're expendable.

If some folks don't die,
then the whole human race will.
It's an ugly truth.
Haiku # 71972, September 13, 2021 3:36 am ET
by Stop overpopulation. Start with politicians. Then government workers and lawyers. Then tattoo artists. of After that we can get rid of the damn Eskimos.
Fucking parasites.
Uniforms with their hands out.
You must pay or die.
Haiku # 71971, September 13, 2021 2:22 am ET
by Criminals, the lot of them.
Hope was not refering to Obama, by the way. Just to clear that up!

Maybe Hope is not even the right word, but it's the first one that comes to mind.
Haiku # 71970, September 12, 2021 11:06 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Google for the pics.
It's a developed duck egg.
Yes, beak and feathers.

They hard boil it.
Served with spicy vinegar
stinky dead fish sauce.

I tried a taste once.
It tastes as bad as it smells.
And smells like it looks.

Sulfur egg odor.
When your college roommate farts,
that's what it smells like.

Truly reeks of Hell.
Hell will be filled with armies
of baby duck souls.

They will take revenge
against the drunken Flippos,
devour their souls.

There's something... evil.
In Flippo mentality,
culture and customs.

True evil, I mean.
Not just greedy and ruthless,
but truly evil.
Haiku # 71969, September 12, 2021 10:56 pm ET
by Takes time to see it, but it's there.


Haiku # 71968, September 12, 2021 10:54 pm ET
by EusebioGnGt of Russia
Do you drink it down?
I hope there's no beaks involved
Is it raw or cooked?
Haiku # 71967, September 12, 2021 10:27 pm ET
by Questions to ask your server of Balot
Have you had balot?
If Hell has food, then that's it.
Hot duck abortions.
Haiku # 71966, September 12, 2021 10:08 pm ET
by With stinky dead fish sauce.
That imp Obama,
That slick puppet candidate,
I do not miss him.
Haiku # 71965, September 12, 2021 9:46 pm ET
by Hope of Change
Всем хорошего настроения!
Возможно не по тематике форума - нужна помощь по теме иконописи.
Нужно выбрать мерную икону для ребёнка.
Слышал что делают прямо по росту ребёнка.
Как лучше заказывать (поделитесь опытом) в каких иконописных мастерских?
Ссылку,если можно но не просто на мастерскую, а именно туда, где Вы лично покупали.
Интересует именно личный опыт.

Заранее спасибо.
Haiku # 71964, September 12, 2021 6:12 pm ET
by СтасVex of Россия
Darth's recent verses:
Stunningly brilliant haiku.
(Balut egg flavor.)
Haiku # 71963, September 12, 2021 1:58 pm ET
by Henpecker of Penhecker
I'd say ghost pepper.
Lasting burning sensation.
Might need a doctor.
Haiku # 71962, September 12, 2021 3:14 am ET
by And I put it in your soup!
Pick the vegetable
that is most like your penis.
String bean, corn or kale
Haiku # 71961, September 12, 2021 12:44 am ET
by Farmer's Daughter
I know for a fact
Ming Lee Nguyen has your wallet.
She love you long time.
Haiku # 71960, September 11, 2021 11:45 pm ET
by Too beaucoup, too beaucoup! of Alabama black snake.
Pooping in your pants
Ain't so bad considering
Humankind is doomed
Haiku # 71959, September 11, 2021 11:34 pm ET
by Jack the Zipper
If it isn't art,
and it isn't functional,
is it comedy?
Haiku # 71958, September 11, 2021 10:24 pm ET
by Chicken Soup!
By the Hu-Kwa bridge,
In the bamboo grove: Dammit!
I lost my wallet.
Haiku # 71957, September 11, 2021 10:08 pm ET
by Losing Things in the Orient
Are you enlightened?
Can I follow you, guru?
Please teach me your ways.

Take all my money.
It is only a burden.
Wait, where did you go?
Haiku # 71956, September 11, 2021 8:23 pm ET
by of $9.95 per minute. Call now!
Extra syllable
Represents one small teardrop
Running down your leg
Haiku # 71955, September 11, 2021 8:00 pm ET
by Sleestack Chopra

Try meditation
Motivational cassettes
Hot genital yoga
Haiku # 71954, September 11, 2021 7:56 pm ET
by Long Island Guru
Are you sad?
I don't think you are.
But you fake it.
Haiku # 71953, September 11, 2021 6:14 pm ET
by Crocodile tears are more real than a whore's. of Proud of your acting skills?
The only thing I know about Afghans is they are overgrown poodles on steroids with a bad attitude and rich women love them more than expensive cars and are they worth fighting a war over and making buildings fall down and thinking about it 20 years after the fact I still cannot see the logic behind this canine inspired jihad and today the light of Hope has finally flickered out after years of threatening to do so. It is sad, but if you cling to your Hope, you'll find it's all an illusion.
Haiku # 71952, September 11, 2021 6:09 pm ET
by I never did like poodles or other silly breeds. of Instant coffee is bad. And it is the reason mankind is doomed. Can you understand this?
I pooped in my pants.
Never been so embarrassed.
BigDiapers dot com.
Haiku # 71951, September 11, 2021 3:40 pm ET
by Http:// of For fat Russians drunk on cheap vodka.
This is a unique place for fashionable women's clothing and accessories.
We offer our clients women's clothing, jewelry, cosmetics and health products, shoes, bags and much more.
Haiku # 71950, September 11, 2021 2:15 pm ET
by ThomasThems of Iraq
The exchange has never been hacked
Trading for 4 years
Wide trading opportunities
Convenient system for depositing and withdrawing funds
Large list of cryptocurrencies
Haiku # 71949, September 11, 2021 2:15 pm ET
by LeslieMoisy of Netherlands Antilles

An online store offering dozens of categories and thousands of products, including consumer electronics, computer accessories, video games,
Ipod and IPhone accessories, flashlights, underwear and jewelry, from its warehouse with unbeatable prices and ready to ship instantly.
Haiku # 71948, September 11, 2021 1:33 pm ET
by Kennethlourf

On the site you can order women's clothing wholesale and retail from the manufacturer as cheaply as possible.
A variety of models and a wide range of sizes for the owners of any shape are our strengths that distinguish us from our competitors.
Haiku # 71947, September 11, 2021 1:33 pm ET
by Kennethlourf

Стань королем настоящего средневекового королевства!
Захватывающая RPG игра и симулятор замка
Haiku # 71946, September 11, 2021 1:33 pm ET
by Justinwrota
Music has tied us
Keyboards & Pianos

Drums & Percussion

String Instruments
Haiku # 71945, September 11, 2021 1:32 pm ET
by GeorgeSat
Thanksgiving dinner.
To live them over again.
Pass the bourbon, Grams.
Haiku # 71944, September 11, 2021 10:47 am ET
by Gravy with giblets.
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