Cannibal Mukbang
With your host, Darth Figpucker!
Longpig, anyone?
by Always Hungry of Meat me by Old Willow
We need some new porn.
Like The Pope banging muppets.
Or poet snuff porn.
by Leave C'Thulu's offspring alone.
Never leave the bed
Like the old folks in Wonka
Those aren't chocolate stains!
by Charlie's Mother of Steaming Laundry Cauldron
You won't find it here
Unless you're looking for
Cephalopod porn
by Helping Tentacles of At your service
Everybody knows
My favourite mathematician
is a haiku poet
by All of the right syllables
Haiku insurance
Low deductible (one fart)
Protect your poems
by Sales Representative
when you do the maths
the answer is seventeen
and that's.... add haiku
by ash of more like adhd
lose those delta blues
rona takes your breath away
and then breaks your heart
by ash of fully vaccinated
If you ever used
Mutual of Omaha
then you are wild.
by Monkeys buying insurance. of Perky Perkins.
If you are homeless
then you are freer than most
and don't pay mortgage.
by blah blah blah
Who's your favorite
mathematician who is
no longer living?
by For just math, it's Euler hands down, but for craziness of But for fun times I'd say Paul Erdős
Okay, so answer what the hell the Willy Wonka Super Skrunch chocolate bar has to do with being patriotic. It's really had me baffled and it's all I can think about... Well, that and Winona Ryder's underwear.
by Seriously! of Would I lie?
I'm right here, friend
It's like that Footprints poem
But it's shit, not sand
by Shitprints of Sand
You have not answered.
No one has said anything.
There's not even spam.
by I feel so alone in this world!
I was a hippie.
Not very patriotic.
Had quite the lice nest.
But how are Skrunch bars
exactly patriotic?
I'm dying to know.
by A home for fleas, a hive for the buzzing bees. A nest for birds, there ain't no words. For the beauty, splendor, the wonder of my hair.
You sillyass bot
Cutting and pasting that text
To bore us to tears
by Spift James of BARBADASS
Sounds delicious
Never get candy here
I'm always hungry
by Anonymous Poet
I recall those days:
Strong patriotic families...
Figpucker knows best!
by Darth of Crew-cut Cold Warrior
I might consider
stopping haiku if I could
get a Super Skrunch.
by Darth Figpucker
Voices in my head
have gone on strike demanding
I give up haiku.
by Fuck 'em. of I am the evil one, they try to make me stop.
I found the info.
It's "Super Skrunch" and "Oompas".
You remember, right?
by I'd trade my dad's Playboys for one of those!
A Golden Ticket
Looks like we both found one, Darth
See you on the tour
by Starkitten
Remember the old
Willy Wonka chocolates
from 40 years back.
by They were pretty damn good. of Can't find them now.
The poems found here
The handiwork of Satan
Keep up the good work!
by Long Haul Trucker of Jug Pissing
Voices in his head
dictating each syllable
He tossed out his meds
by Escaped Patient of Backless examining gown
Frank Sterb, paisano.
Usted baila merengue
Como un robot.
by Mangú of CIBAO
He pulls out Werther's
Farts escape his tired butt cheeks
Each fart a haiku
by Noticer of Details
Yes, old man; correct.
Everything is all broken.
And keeps getting worse.
by Blame God and Blotzman. of 2nd Law of Thermodynamics.
Not funny no more
Reality is the joke
Broken, not woken
by Vhs
excellent publish, very informative. I'm wondering why the opposite experts of this sector don't realize this. You must proceed your writing. I'm confident, you have a great readers' base already!
by FrankSterb of Dominican Republic
Gust of wind whispers
What would you like for breakfast?
I'll blow dry your balls
by Farts of packed in concentrated mackerel juice
Capitalist dogs!
America will soon fall!
Starbucks Coffee too!
You ask which country??!!
The United States, of course!
I don't mean Brazil!
Look, you idiot.
I know America is BIG.
North and South, yeah so.
Jesus, get a life.
Can't I even post Commie
Propaganda here?!
by The Marxist Brothers
Don't get worked up, Darth
There is no real ex wives club.
We'd still have at you
by Darth is Love of Old Willow Nature Cult
did you notice that
my non-existent undies
are impervious
indestructible
magnetoluminescent
odoriferous
by And many other great words. of I have the best words. Amazing words. Fantastic words. You won't find better words.
Go back and read the
Nineteen-ninety-seven posts.
Guess which ones are mine.
by You filthy slut biscuit of 90% pork gravy.
Will Janis help her?
The IP address log book.
I don't fucking care.
by I may be a pervert, but of course all child molesters should die! Depopulate the planet starting with them.
I am offended.
All this SPAM could feed millions.
If it were real SPAM.
by I think Janis gave up. of My ex is busy collecting all the poems I post on here to use in divorce court, the stupid psycho slut.
When a whore asks me
"What would you like for breakfast?"
That's a good feeling.
by Eggs over easy, toast, and coffee. of Anywhere that chickens lay eggs.
Penis tuxedoes
Why you dashing, dapper dinks!
Pardon, they're penquins
by Jerker of Turtles
The red popsicle:
A hammer and popsicle
Frozen commie treat
by Leon Lenin of ARKANGELSK
The popsicle's gone
Victims of power outage
Those little poets!
by Hurry up, Darth of Crank out some more
I want in on that
Octopus Hug-a-thon
Ladies get Free Drinks
by Noticer of Seashells of Dlver Down
I just figured out
I was writing here way back
in ninety-seven.
by Jesus, I'm old.
I to you will remember it! I will pay off with you!
by Scottylox of Kyrgyzstan
You commit an error. I can defend the position. Write to me in PM, we will talk.
by Kevinarcaw of Turkey
Vasectomy, yes.
I have a sperm popsicle
to repopulate.
Just imagine it.
A billion new Figpuckers
after World War III.
If you don't eat it,
high one night after Netflix.
Frozen protein treat.
by Lord Figpucker of Sith happens.
You told me you did
a self vasectomy, Darth
I just see a dick
by Figpucker Ex Wives Club of All his exes give him hexes
I bought your children
Turns out they are sea monkeys
Radioactive
by Noticer of Fukushima Fuckers
I sold my children.
Now I live under a bridge.
Huffing paint thinner.
It's a better life.
But now I have no excuse
to play at playgrounds.
What was I thinking?
This world's full of dirty whores.
I'll just make some more.
by Planned Parenthood. of In The Rear.
Try Ben & Jerry's
"Cherry Garcia" ice cream
after opium.
It's like finding God.
First you have to fight dragons.
Then raped by Care Bears.
by Rainbow marshmallow cream.
