Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 56 Days and 78008 Haiku later...
That’s what you get when
you line the cage with bad haiku.
Cassowary Bird!
Haiku # 70721 May 28, 2021 11:22 pm ET
by Cassowary #1 of Cassowary Lane
I bought a parrot.
But it died when I got home.
Deceased. No more. Dead.
Haiku # 70720 May 27, 2021 9:09 pm ET
by It is an X-Parrot of "No, it's just resting."
Barbara Streisand.
Her nose has magic powers.
Boogers are diamonds.
Haiku # 70719 May 27, 2021 1:08 pm ET
by No, I am not Matt Stone or Trey Parker of But I can dream.
Go buy a parrot.
Teach it to say vulgar things.
Give it to a zoo.
Haiku # 70718 May 27, 2021 1:03 pm ET
by Or release it back to the wild so it can teach the other parrots.
You want to see Greeks?
A caged death match with Yanni?
Want to smash plates, too?
Haiku # 70717 May 27, 2021 2:31 am ET
by A. Cropolis of Now
I want to see geeks.
Caged death match with a chicken.
Take the kids to watch.
Haiku # 70716 May 27, 2021 2:08 am ET
by Wholesome family fun. of So what if he's naked.
Yessah. Finestkind.
Them lobstahs taste wicked good.
Penobscot. Ayuh.
Haiku # 70714 May 26, 2021 3:37 pm ET
by Mainely Haiku of Downeastuh
Get your Moxie up.
Take Coke from Doctor Pepper
Or Hunter Biden.
Haiku # 70713 May 26, 2021 1:40 pm ET
by Bicycle tha Crack Ho of Laptoplandia
Your satisfaction
guaranteed at this website
Quality Haikus
Haiku # 70712 May 26, 2021 1:59 am ET
by Our new policy of Under Old Willow
Un monopolio:
Cuando los monos mandan
en monomundo.
Haiku # 70711 May 25, 2021 10:17 pm ET
by Fulano Banano of Guneo
i wonder if i
should get people from twitter
to come here to tell

me to fuck off
Haiku # 70710 May 25, 2021 8:26 pm ET
by moxie
I did not know they
can tattoo in microfilm.
Do they use lasers?
Haiku # 70709 May 25, 2021 6:52 am ET
by People do anything to be "individual". of Even join the herd.
Whatchoo talkin' 'bout?!
Who the hell eats "iced cream"?!
But ice cream is good.

Expensive abroad.
Ten dollars for a damn pint.
Not fucking joking!
Haiku # 70708 May 25, 2021 6:48 am ET
by Braum's, Haagen-Dazs... hell, even Blue Bell. of Anything but Nestle's... nasty artificial dairy crap.
I've seriously
cut back on my cheese intake.
No heart attacks, thanks.
Haiku # 70707 May 25, 2021 6:44 am ET
by Unless I'm attacked by a heart. of That would be cool.
winter is coming
and though you thought it was snow
it's really iced cream
Haiku # 70706 May 25, 2021 5:35 am ET
by ash of today's weather report
The hieroglyphics
tattooed on the very tip
of Figpucker's cock
Haiku # 70705 May 25, 2021 2:09 am ET
by Translated to English of Just a cheese shopping list
New Superheroes
Flying Firehosepenis Man
and his Dalmatian
Haiku # 70703 May 25, 2021 12:11 am ET
by Flying Firehosepenis Man of Not into kinks
Shoes in the doorway
Well it could be Grandma's dildoes
Broken hips for all!
Haiku # 70702 May 24, 2021 10:02 pm ET
by Jill Tripper of Welcome Mat
How many beak pecks?
Let's ask Cassowary Bird
One hundred and two.
Haiku # 70701 May 24, 2021 9:58 pm ET
by Fucked in the head (by Godzilla's member) of Trepanning Clinic (Just off the Old Willow Exit)
Who's had thorazine?
I wonder if it's worth it,
being admitted.
Haiku # 70700 May 24, 2021 9:57 pm ET
by A vacation is in order.
How many haiku
does it take to get to the
center of madness?
Haiku # 70699 May 24, 2021 8:52 pm ET
by Let's ask Mr. Owl.
Trepanning convert.
Cured of the insanity.
Let those demons out!
Haiku # 70698 May 24, 2021 8:51 pm ET
by Out demon! Out I say! of Holy water brain spritz.
Living in Asia.
Sneaking around late at night.
Jack off in their shoes.
Haiku # 70697 May 24, 2021 8:46 pm ET
by Strange how they pile their shoes in the doorway of the house. of Not even to the side, but like right in the doorway. You have to jump over them.
Penis cock schlong dick
dork member ding-a-ling bulge
one-eyed-wonder worm.
Haiku # 70696 May 24, 2021 8:43 pm ET
by The spirit of George Carlin compells you!
Godzilla's member?
We never see his penis.
New hentai genre?
Haiku # 70695 May 24, 2021 8:36 pm ET
by I mean, why not? of Beats demon octopussies.
We checked the fine print
Godzilla defecation
You’ll have full coverage
Haiku # 70694 May 24, 2021 5:31 pm ET
by Yul B. Needeep of in Godzilla poop
Movie Merchandise
Goldzilla Mega Member!
Makes your member HUGE
Haiku # 70693 May 24, 2021 5:27 pm ET
by Member of Membership has its benefits
No, teeth marks are good.
That means that it is real gold.
Not Jewish are you?
Haiku # 70692 May 24, 2021 12:00 pm ET
by Oy vay!
I hate to tell you
but I saw teeth marks down there
Dong’s made of Fool’s Gold
Haiku # 70691 May 24, 2021 8:12 am ET
by Peter Panner of Undisclosed
Lloyd's of London.
Those freaks insure anything. Even my gold dong.
Haiku # 70690 May 24, 2021 6:36 am ET
by No, I have not used it. of Thanks for asking.
If Godzilla pooped
and it landed on your house,
would insurance pay?
Haiku # 70689 May 24, 2021 6:33 am ET
by I want to buy Godzilla poop insurane. of You're in good hands.
You probably noticed
my purrsonalized collar
and sandpaper tongue
Haiku # 70688 May 24, 2021 2:09 am ET
by Starkitten of chat, chaton
starkitten...well heck
now where have i seen that name
before, chat rooms or?
Haiku # 70687 May 23, 2021 11:52 pm ET
by vhs
God does not love you,
but Godzilla loves money,
and that's close enough.
Haiku # 70686 May 23, 2021 6:47 pm ET
by Roar, smash, crash of give me that cash.
If you poop your pants
at Godzilla vs. Kong
then you're a pussy.
Haiku # 70685 May 23, 2021 6:44 pm ET
by Nothing to see here, plenty to smell though of move along, move along.
You have now been warned:
If you kiss the Figpucker
There will be maggots.
Haiku # 70682 May 23, 2021 8:02 am ET
by Carrion Carry-on of CARRY ON
The shark has been jumped
That dead horse, one last time humped
Buh bye bad haiku
Haiku # 70681 May 23, 2021 12:11 am ET
by .
Packing my valise
No need to bring much clothing
I’ll just wear a smile
Haiku # 70680 May 21, 2021 6:14 pm ET
by I. Tinerary of Cathouse
Listen to true crime.
That's where you will find the truth.
Because crime is TRUE.
Haiku # 70679 May 21, 2021 3:05 pm ET
by Forensic Analysis of The Scene
Is now dating site?
Soon you will all meet in hell
No need to make plans
Haiku # 70678 May 21, 2021 2:40 pm ET
by Jesus of Arkansas
The Holiday Inn.
At Oklahoma City.
Southwest Fifteenth Street.
Haiku # 70677 May 21, 2021 12:18 am ET
by 4501 SW 15th St, Oklahoma City, OK 73108 of But will take some time for me to get out of here. Let's plan on July 4. We'll see.
Where will we meet, Darth?
No kissing allowed in here
Need a private room
Haiku # 70676 May 20, 2021 10:21 pm ET
by SK of Just a kiss away
I'm ready to quit.
Time to live on an island.
Humans are awful.
Haiku # 70675 May 20, 2021 10:11 pm ET
by The whole bloody lot of them. of Especially Eskimos.
I want just the best.
Lots of diners have waffles.
Few have twat waffles.
Haiku # 70674 May 20, 2021 10:06 pm ET
by Blue waffles made with blueberry syrup. of Yummy!
Okay Starkitten.
You want to hookup with me?
First one's a freebie.
Haiku # 70673 May 20, 2021 8:32 pm ET
by I'm such a whore. of And unashamed.
The lady next door
wears a triple G cup size
Better start running
Haiku # 70672 May 20, 2021 6:45 pm ET
by Noticed of Details of Laundry Detail
Nosey Neighborhood
Show them who's boss this summer
Lemonade in Face
Haiku # 70671 May 20, 2021 6:41 pm ET
by Sour Puss of Ready
Chugging Spring Tonic
Ma Nature's High Colonic
Dandelion Greens!
Haiku # 70670 May 20, 2021 5:18 pm ET
by Will Giveyoutheshitz of Take a Guess
A milkshake for two
Darth's balding head. We nuzzle
like horny horses
Haiku # 70669 May 20, 2021 5:12 pm ET
by Starhorse of Kicking the stall
Wild Springtime Bear Tug
Will he maul you this morning?
Or happy ending?
Haiku # 70668 May 20, 2021 12:59 am ET
by Jack Urso, Proprietor, Grizz Tug Tours of Juneau, Alaska Juneau how to milk a cow??
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