Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years, 211 Days and 70743 Haikus later...

I work at Pfizer.
Jacked off in the vaccine batch.
High cooz in your head.
Haiku # 70458, April 18, 2021 6:31 am ET
by Now you're infected!
Vaccines make you gay.
I mean, you're already gay.
But now you're more gay.
Haiku # 70457, April 18, 2021 6:18 am ET
by Pray the Gay Away!
Don't wait! Vaccinate!
Don't wanna be Covid bait
Stay in healthy state
Haiku # 70456, April 18, 2021 5:28 am ET
by Noticer of Details of Noticing You
Have someone bumped off
Coming soon to Amazon
2-Day Fulfillment
Haiku # 70455, April 17, 2021 11:47 pm ET
by P. Ann O’Ire of Irish Mafia
Soccer or football....
No matter what you might call it...
Still boring as hell
Haiku # 70454, April 17, 2021 1:41 pm ET
by Orange slices at half-time
Haiku Convention
Match the face with the poems
Yes, Darth, there’s free cheese
Haiku # 70453, April 16, 2021 8:22 pm ET
by Hello my name is of No Tell Hotel
I took a dump there
Wiped my ass with sharp pine cones
Then I soldiered on
Haiku # 70452, April 16, 2021 3:21 pm ET
by I. M. Chafed of Trailing Toilet Paper
Appalachian trail
Appalachian trail. Apple
ate shin chair. Adam.
Haiku # 70451, April 16, 2021 2:33 pm ET
by Not Adam of Home
Collective malaise
Thin veneer of decorum
Divided by tech
Haiku # 70450, April 16, 2021 2:32 pm ET
by Not Adam of Home
Scrub a dub a doo
Lift the brown stains of your poo
Toilet looks like new
Haiku # 70449, April 15, 2021 3:31 pm ET
by Tidy Azmodius of Latrine
Come to me demons
I summon thee with haiku
Now clean my toilet
Haiku # 70448, April 15, 2021 8:52 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Only Dart-filth now...
This site has become boring
Since it got new look
Haiku # 70447, April 15, 2021 8:00 am ET
by Bored Visitor
To summon demons
Pick seventeen syllables
We'll call it haiku
Haiku # 70446, April 14, 2021 10:21 pm ET
by Author of Demons for Dummies
Hey, what about me?
Jeffrey wants in on it too.
I'll bring whipping cream
Haiku # 70445, April 14, 2021 9:02 pm ET
by Mangina Garten of Hamptons
I’d get in on that
There’d be lots of good weed first
Nice dinner after
Haiku # 70444, April 14, 2021 5:37 pm ET
by Author of Martha, Snoop and Me
Please imagine this
Martha and Snoop get it on
No need to thank me
Haiku # 70443, April 14, 2021 12:39 pm ET
by Jack the Zipper
A donut filled with
McKenzie Phillips’ zit puss
and Schneider's semen
Haiku # 70442, April 14, 2021 6:50 am ET
by From the makers of Tom Bosley’s Warm Load Eggwich
My night with Martha
The way she gripped my stiff rod
Like a hot glue gun
Haiku # 70441, April 14, 2021 5:39 am ET
by Fucked hard by Martha Stewart of Connecticut, usa
Perfect update of captcha breaking software "XEvil 5.0":

Captcha regignizing of Google (ReCaptcha-2 and ReCaptcha-3), Facebook, BitFinex, Hotmail, Mail.Ru, SolveMedia, Hydra,
and more than 12000 another size-types of captchas,
with highest precision (80..100%) and highest speed (100 img per second).
You can use XEvil 5.0 with any most popular SEO/SMM software: iMacros, XRumer, SERP Parser, GSA SER, RankerX, ZennoPoster, Scrapebox, Senuke, FaucetCollector and more than 100 of other programms.

Interested? There are a lot of introducing videos about XEvil in YouTube.

Free XEvil Demo available.

Good luck ;)
P.S. A Huge Discount -30% for XEvil full version until 15 Jan is AVAILABLE! :)


XEvil Net
Haiku # 70440, April 14, 2021 5:31 am ET
by Heatherbrity of Russia
Hung like a dead horse.
Rotten and full of maggots.
And this gets you hot.
Haiku # 70439, April 14, 2021 4:48 am ET
by Rotten HUNGarian sausage. of Funtcart
Good that it was huge.
Only 3 inches poked out
from under that gut.
Haiku # 70438, April 14, 2021 3:57 am ET
by you can have it sister
Kicking a dead horse?
Tom Bosley was hung like one
Thanks for your support.
Haiku # 70437, April 13, 2021 11:03 pm ET
by Speaking of support, Tom Bosley had a massive jock strap.
You are reading words
Here are some more words to read
And now...no more words
Haiku # 70436, April 13, 2021 10:56 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
QGWCYA2V2Q43WHCWXF www.google.com Where are you located ? I want to come to you one of these days
Haiku # 70435, April 13, 2021 12:01 am ET
by QGWCYA2V2Q43WHCWXF www.web.de of a point or extent in space
Seeking to purchase
Jewel encrusted dildo
due to husband’s death
Haiku # 70434, April 12, 2021 3:56 am ET
by B. Cause of I miss that old dildo
For future poems
Odes on belching in public?
Farting in church pews?
Haiku # 70433, April 11, 2021 7:34 pm ET
by Your smelly friend
They don't wipe it off.
Haiku # 70432, April 11, 2021 3:47 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Just how do you know
when you come across a real
genuine poet?
Haiku # 70431, April 11, 2021 3:41 am ET
by Emily Dickingsome of My room
Доброго времени суток дамы и господа!Есть такой интересный сайт для заказа бурения скважин на воду. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Y0zYtrRCia9jfU-BH3WPIbhph6HvwDRl/view?usp=sharing Бурение скважин в Минске – полный комплекс качественных и разумных по цене услуг. Заказывайте скважину для воды в АКВАБУРсервис – получите доступ к экологически чистой природной воде по самым выгодным в Минске ценам! Наша сфера деятельности — проектирование и бурение скважин на воду, установка любого насосного оборудования, монтаж систем канализации всех видов, дренажей, ливневых систем и др.Миссия компании: мы добываем чистую воду – источник всего живого на Земле, и делаем ее доступной людям. Самый короткий срок, за который мы пробурили и обустроили скважину, — 1 час 36 минут. Мы ценим время своих клиентов и гордимся, что оперативность — отличительное свойство наших услуг. Мы показываем, насколько быстро и качественно может происходить бурение скважины.
Увидимся!
Haiku # 70430, April 11, 2021 2:39 am ET
by Andreasrps of Dominican Republic
Man at the checkout
“Can you scan this salami?”
“I came in with it!!”
Haiku # 70429, April 11, 2021 12:40 am ET
by Eyewitness of He wasn’t shoplifting
Fun gondola ride
Alimentary Canal
Shit, there’s the anus
Haiku # 70428, April 11, 2021 12:32 am ET
by Name withheld of Tourist Trap
Just like that, he's back
Sticky trail in the cheese aisle
Galloping Gourmet
Haiku # 70427, April 10, 2021 10:32 pm ET
by Fan of Gentle Darth of Not at King Soopers loaded for bear
Sentient organs
of dead B-actors remain
alive through dark arts.

Blood replenishing
Red Cross inappropriate
misappropriate.

Grafted to a mouse.
Mister Garrison's penis
craves cheese fromunda.

Fromage fromunda
in Whole Foods deli section.
Lost my train of thought.

Kicking that dead horse.
Methinks Tom Bosley's penis
has jumped the great white.
Haiku # 70426, April 10, 2021 9:29 pm ET
by Carolina Reapers rubbed on your boner. of Might be fun. Give it a try.
What the hell is this?
Where the heck did it come from?
How did it happen?
Haiku # 70425, April 10, 2021 4:47 pm ET
by Tom Bosley's penis and aquarium cleaning service.
Привет господа!Предлагаем Вашему вниманию замечательный сайт для заказа бурения скважин на воду. Бурение скважин в Минске компанией ЕВРОБУРСЕРВИС – полный комплекс качественных и разумных по цене услуг. Мы бурим любые виды скважин.У нас доступная ценовая политика, рассрочка на услуги и оборудование.Заказывайте скважину для воды в euroburservice – получите доступ к экологически чистой природной воде по самым выгодным в Минске ценам! В результате работ по бурению: все работает вне зависимости от поры года, зимой вода не замерзает; внутрь не попадут грунтовые и стоковые воды или посторонние предметы; вода бесперебойно поставляется из подземного водоносного слоя. Обустройство скважин на воду в Минске. В рамках комплекса наших услуг в Минской области мы также определяем динамический и статический уровень воды в скважине. Заключительный этап — подведение воды по трубопроводу. С этой целью мы устанавливаем мембранный бак, куда закачивается вода. Объем закачиваемой воды и, соответственно, объем бака зависит от того, сколько требуется воды в данном домохозяйстве или на данном объекте. Дальнейшее распределение воды по помещениям происходит уже из этого бака. После того, как вода подана, по желанию заказчика можно установить водоочистные системы различной сложности, отопительные и водонагревательные системы и системы автоматического управления.
Увидимся!
http://gamecreating.org.ru/index/8-49770
http://all-cs.net.ru/index/8-148347
http://models-art.ru/2019/11/01/%d0%bf%d1%80%d0%b8%d0%b2%d0%b5%d1%82-%d0%bc%d0%b8%d1%80/?unapproved=40693&moderation-hash=1fc1304ab0650787172fa15f984f77b5#comment-40693
http://www.rusforum.com/member.php?u=939368
https://swordmaster.org/user/Helenavzs/
Haiku # 70424, April 10, 2021 8:20 am ET
by Antonioqcc of Dominica
All white girls agree.
Tyrone, please pull up your pants.
We see your skid marks.
Haiku # 70423, April 9, 2021 7:28 pm ET
by How did that pants half down shit ever become a fad?! of Are they still doing that?
All yall so STOOPID.
Gone on bout all yall HAIKU.
Talking SMACK, thass all.
Haiku # 70421, April 9, 2021 4:50 pm ET
by Tyrone of Tha Poetic Streetz
Relieve the pig sty.
Fleas, tit jizz maul thy half cleft...
Hell, shat on my punz
Haiku # 70420, April 9, 2021 4:47 pm ET
by 300% of your brain malfunctions of The rest is Velveeta and Oscar Mayer bologna on Rainbow bread.
Believe the big lie.
Please, it is all I have left....
Well, that and my gunz
Haiku # 70419, April 9, 2021 2:36 pm ET
by 3% of my brain functions...the rest is porno and Marlboros
Believe the big lie.
Please, it is all I have left....
Well, that and my gunz
Haiku # 70418, April 9, 2021 2:36 pm ET
by 3% of my brain functions...the rest is porno and Marlboros
Say that she is dead.
And the SPAM will disappear.
It works like a charm.
Haiku # 70417, April 9, 2021 5:27 am ET
by Bad Haiku will outlive the human race. of Still maintained by Overfiend Jahnuus, thr Demon of Spells... or something
Look into his eyes
Abe Vigoda is sexy
and hung like a horse
Haiku # 70416, April 8, 2021 9:49 pm ET
by Willing and Abe-l of Autopsy Table
That kid on Kindle
with a book, under the tree
A young VHS
Haiku # 70415, April 8, 2021 9:44 pm ET
by Y.R. Thepagesstucktogether of Legends of Bad Haiku
I feel a sudden
Kinship to Abe Vigoda
I'm simply not dead
Haiku # 70414, April 8, 2021 8:20 pm ET
by Janis of Right here on the chesterfield.
The question posed,
"Has bad haiku jumped the shark?"
Ya, in the 90s.
Haiku # 70413, April 8, 2021 8:13 pm ET
by Janis of I was here first
Looks like Janis died.
The spammers will now rejoice.
And post all day long.
Haiku # 70412, April 8, 2021 8:08 pm ET
by If not dead, then raptured.
I like eating pets.
But only if they're not mine.
Can't eat my leeches.
Haiku # 70411, April 8, 2021 8:06 pm ET
by Well, I COULD, but that would be psychotic.
I don’t eat salmon
Maybe it’s because I once
had one for a pet
Haiku # 70410, April 8, 2021 7:11 pm ET
by gatita estrella of catnip galaxy
DC should be called
Dogshit Incorporated,
and not "Washington".

Say hi to the trees.
And the chipmonks and critters.
And potheads and freaks.

Oy vay, already!
Now I'm craving salmon lox
on toasted bagel.
Haiku # 70408, April 8, 2021 6:36 am ET
by Seattle... remember the 6 foot bong, remember it too well. of And girls giving us ice cream. :-)
No, the other one
Torching one with Bigfoot now
Pacific Northwest
Haiku # 70407, April 8, 2021 12:37 am ET
by gatita of Litter pan
< 50 Less Recent Haiku 50 More Recent Haiku >