Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 242 Days and 77165 Haiku later...

Appalachian trail
Appalachian trail. Apple
ate shin chair. Adam.
Haiku # 70451, April 16, 2021 2:33 pm ET
by Not Adam of Home
Collective malaise
Thin veneer of decorum
Divided by tech
Haiku # 70450, April 16, 2021 2:32 pm ET
by Not Adam of Home
Scrub a dub a doo
Lift the brown stains of your poo
Toilet looks like new
Haiku # 70449, April 15, 2021 3:31 pm ET
by Tidy Azmodius of Latrine
Come to me demons
I summon thee with haiku
Now clean my toilet
Haiku # 70448, April 15, 2021 8:52 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Only Dart-filth now...
This site has become boring
Since it got new look
Haiku # 70447, April 15, 2021 8:00 am ET
by Bored Visitor
To summon demons
Pick seventeen syllables
We'll call it haiku
Haiku # 70446, April 14, 2021 10:21 pm ET
by Author of Demons for Dummies
Hey, what about me?
Jeffrey wants in on it too.
I'll bring whipping cream
Haiku # 70445, April 14, 2021 9:02 pm ET
by Mangina Garten of Hamptons
I’d get in on that
There’d be lots of good weed first
Nice dinner after
Haiku # 70444, April 14, 2021 5:37 pm ET
by Author of Martha, Snoop and Me
Please imagine this
Martha and Snoop get it on
No need to thank me
Haiku # 70443, April 14, 2021 12:39 pm ET
by Jack the Zipper
A donut filled with
McKenzie Phillips’ zit puss
and Schneider's semen
Haiku # 70442, April 14, 2021 6:50 am ET
by From the makers of Tom Bosley’s Warm Load Eggwich
My night with Martha
The way she gripped my stiff rod
Like a hot glue gun
Haiku # 70441, April 14, 2021 5:39 am ET
by Fucked hard by Martha Stewart of Connecticut, usa
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Haiku # 70440, April 14, 2021 5:31 am ET
by Heatherbrity of Russia
Hung like a dead horse.
Rotten and full of maggots.
And this gets you hot.
Haiku # 70439, April 14, 2021 4:48 am ET
by Rotten HUNGarian sausage. of Funtcart
Good that it was huge.
Only 3 inches poked out
from under that gut.
Haiku # 70438, April 14, 2021 3:57 am ET
by you can have it sister
Kicking a dead horse?
Tom Bosley was hung like one
Thanks for your support.
Haiku # 70437, April 13, 2021 11:03 pm ET
by Speaking of support, Tom Bosley had a massive jock strap.
You are reading words
Here are some more words to read
And more words
Haiku # 70436, April 13, 2021 10:56 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
QGWCYA2V2Q43WHCWXF Where are you located ? I want to come to you one of these days
Haiku # 70435, April 13, 2021 12:01 am ET
by QGWCYA2V2Q43WHCWXF of a point or extent in space
Seeking to purchase
Jewel encrusted dildo
due to husband’s death
Haiku # 70434, April 12, 2021 3:56 am ET
by B. Cause of I miss that old dildo
For future poems
Odes on belching in public?
Farting in church pews?
Haiku # 70433, April 11, 2021 7:34 pm ET
by Your smelly friend
They don't wipe it off.
Haiku # 70432, April 11, 2021 3:47 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Just how do you know
when you come across a real
genuine poet?
Haiku # 70431, April 11, 2021 3:41 am ET
by Emily Dickingsome of My room
Man at the checkout
“Can you scan this salami?”
“I came in with it!!”
Haiku # 70429, April 11, 2021 12:40 am ET
by Eyewitness of He wasn’t shoplifting
Fun gondola ride
Alimentary Canal
Shit, there’s the anus
Haiku # 70428, April 11, 2021 12:32 am ET
by Name withheld of Tourist Trap
Just like that, he's back
Sticky trail in the cheese aisle
Galloping Gourmet
Haiku # 70427, April 10, 2021 10:32 pm ET
by Fan of Gentle Darth of Not at King Soopers loaded for bear
Sentient organs
of dead B-actors remain
alive through dark arts.

Blood replenishing
Red Cross inappropriate

Grafted to a mouse.
Mister Garrison's penis
craves cheese fromunda.

Fromage fromunda
in Whole Foods deli section.
Lost my train of thought.

Kicking that dead horse.
Methinks Tom Bosley's penis
has jumped the great white.
Haiku # 70426, April 10, 2021 9:29 pm ET
by Carolina Reapers rubbed on your boner. of Might be fun. Give it a try.
What the hell is this?
Where the heck did it come from?
How did it happen?
Haiku # 70425, April 10, 2021 4:47 pm ET
by Tom Bosley's penis and aquarium cleaning service.
All white girls agree.
Tyrone, please pull up your pants.
We see your skid marks.
Haiku # 70423, April 9, 2021 7:28 pm ET
by How did that pants half down shit ever become a fad?! of Are they still doing that?
All yall so STOOPID.
Gone on bout all yall HAIKU.
Talking SMACK, thass all.
Haiku # 70421, April 9, 2021 4:50 pm ET
by Tyrone of Tha Poetic Streetz
Relieve the pig sty.
Fleas, tit jizz maul thy half cleft...
Hell, shat on my punz
Haiku # 70420, April 9, 2021 4:47 pm ET
by 300% of your brain malfunctions of The rest is Velveeta and Oscar Mayer bologna on Rainbow bread.
Believe the big lie.
Please, it is all I have left....
Well, that and my gunz
Haiku # 70419, April 9, 2021 2:36 pm ET
by 3% of my brain functions...the rest is porno and Marlboros
Believe the big lie.
Please, it is all I have left....
Well, that and my gunz
Haiku # 70418, April 9, 2021 2:36 pm ET
by 3% of my brain functions...the rest is porno and Marlboros
Say that she is dead.
And the SPAM will disappear.
It works like a charm.
Haiku # 70417, April 9, 2021 5:27 am ET
by Bad Haiku will outlive the human race. of Still maintained by Overfiend Jahnuus, thr Demon of Spells... or something
Look into his eyes
Abe Vigoda is sexy
and hung like a horse
Haiku # 70416, April 8, 2021 9:49 pm ET
by Willing and Abe-l of Autopsy Table
That kid on Kindle
with a book, under the tree
A young VHS
Haiku # 70415, April 8, 2021 9:44 pm ET
by Y.R. Thepagesstucktogether of Legends of Bad Haiku
I feel a sudden
Kinship to Abe Vigoda
I'm simply not dead
Haiku # 70414, April 8, 2021 8:20 pm ET
by Janis of Right here on the chesterfield.
The question posed,
"Has bad haiku jumped the shark?"
Ya, in the 90s.
Haiku # 70413, April 8, 2021 8:13 pm ET
by Janis of I was here first
Looks like Janis died.
The spammers will now rejoice.
And post all day long.
Haiku # 70412, April 8, 2021 8:08 pm ET
by If not dead, then raptured.
I like eating pets.
But only if they're not mine.
Can't eat my leeches.
Haiku # 70411, April 8, 2021 8:06 pm ET
by Well, I COULD, but that would be psychotic.
I don’t eat salmon
Maybe it’s because I once
had one for a pet
Haiku # 70410, April 8, 2021 7:11 pm ET
by gatita estrella of catnip galaxy
DC should be called
Dogshit Incorporated,
and not "Washington".

Say hi to the trees.
And the chipmonks and critters.
And potheads and freaks.

Oy vay, already!
Now I'm craving salmon lox
on toasted bagel.
Haiku # 70408, April 8, 2021 6:36 am ET
by Seattle... remember the 6 foot bong, remember it too well. of And girls giving us ice cream. :-)
No, the other one
Torching one with Bigfoot now
Pacific Northwest
Haiku # 70407, April 8, 2021 12:37 am ET
by gatita of Litter pan
Washington? DC?!?!
Knew I smelled something in here!
Illegal. Always.
Haiku # 70406, April 7, 2021 11:13 pm ET
by it's no fun unless it's felony.
Hibiscus tea, please
I'm always in the catnip
Haiku # 70405, April 7, 2021 7:46 pm ET
by Gatita Estrella of In the nip
I prefer coffee.
So is tea your cup of tea?
Or just tequila?
Haiku # 70404, April 7, 2021 7:24 pm ET
by What's your favorite legal stimuli?
It's hanging leftwise.
A bit swollen and blackened.
Road head on dirt road.
Haiku # 70403, April 7, 2021 7:20 pm ET
by Bad idea. of But getting better. Next time I'll pull over.
Take careful notes here.
You can use these things in court.
After you are dead.
Haiku # 70402, April 7, 2021 7:18 pm ET
by Electrocute my ass. of Feed me to the pigs.
Otis Firefly.
Here to do the Devil's Work.
Because like, why not?

People who should die:
Those who say "it's not my job".
Get off your fat ass!
Haiku # 70401, April 7, 2021 7:16 pm ET
by BifurcatingPoo
Not my cup of tea
But how’s it hanging old Darth?
Unload some poems
Haiku # 70400, April 7, 2021 6:34 pm ET
by Ms. Gatita Estrella of Under old willow
Hannibal Lecter
feeding that guy his own brain
is pure awesomeness.
Haiku # 70399, April 7, 2021 6:15 pm ET
by Gives me a stiffie just thinking about it. of How about you?
I like beef jerky.
Best if it's really spicy.
I bet bison is good.
Haiku # 70398, April 7, 2021 6:12 pm ET
by Some things I miss.
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