Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
24 Years, 182 Days and 70642 Haikus later...

Let's talk religion
philosophy, and science.
Fart jokes are now banned.
Haiku # 70110, February 17, 2021 8:36 pm ET
by Farcebook Police Dept. of Not enough censorship in day job.
Which is more pervy,
Woman likes child molesters
or gramps with hot babes?
Haiku # 70109, February 17, 2021 11:17 am ET
by It's a sick, sick world.
Using the word "chop"
and "penis" in one haiku.
Loraina Bobbit?
Haiku # 70108, February 17, 2021 11:08 am ET
by John Wayne. of Better circle the wagons, pilgram.
When robots make poop
It comes out as a long string
Letters and numbers
Haiku # 70107, February 17, 2021 3:02 am ET
by Robot of Lit
Remember the jokes
with Johnny Fuckerfaster
He was trying to...
Haiku # 70105, February 16, 2021 7:44 pm ET
by Can't remember of Joke nor punchline
Not all are bad here
Most haikus just need more work
Need... motivation.
Haiku # 70104, February 16, 2021 6:53 pm ET
by Warflarglbargl of Barglarglwarfl
Elvis penis ghost
It has mutton chop sideburns
Hunk of burning love
Haiku # 70103, February 16, 2021 2:34 pm ET
by I will not grow up you bossy poo face
Just grow the fuck up
Its like junior high school here
Immaturity
Haiku # 70102, February 16, 2021 11:11 am ET
by Bossy McFucky
Evil penis ghost
It starts out small but grows big
Then it spits at you
Haiku # 70101, February 16, 2021 2:02 am ET
by Dinky Doo of Phantom Phallus Investigative Research Foundation
Angle of dangle
Proportional to meat heat
You can’t argue that
Haiku # 70100, February 16, 2021 1:59 am ET
by Slim Jim of Hanging low
Angling is fishing
I’ve got a pole. So do you.
And you have a worm
Haiku # 70099, February 15, 2021 10:31 pm ET
by Catfish Net of Stalkings
Fuck TikTok.
I'll say it again.
Fuck TikTok.
Haiku # 70098, February 15, 2021 10:05 am ET
by No equation could be this true!
The angle of the dangle is proportional to the heat of the meat.
Haiku # 70097, February 15, 2021 10:01 am ET
by blahblahblah
I don't know "wokeness".
But I do know "Wookieness".
Just bang drunk Ewoks.
Haiku # 70096, February 15, 2021 9:57 am ET
by DARTH Whorendous is the name.
For math tutoring
I just need lots of money
or some LSD.

The drugs are for you.
Then you'll think that you learned math.
When you're just trippin'.
Haiku # 70095, February 15, 2021 9:54 am ET
by Think I give away my secrets for peanuts?!?!
is df on here?
i want to have some advice
on fixing wokeness
Haiku # 70094, February 14, 2021 11:25 pm ET
by moxie
How do I sign up
for math tutoring, Darth?
I need extra help
Haiku # 70092, February 14, 2021 6:58 pm ET
by G.E.
Schrodinger's dinger;
It is both erect and not.
First you must observe!
Haiku # 70091, February 14, 2021 6:25 pm ET
by You get what you get, don't throw a fit.
The amount of cats
is only approximate.
Schrodinger's grandma.
Haiku # 70090, February 14, 2021 6:21 pm ET
by Check out my huge equation!
This Valentine’s Day
Get her what she really wants
Kittens! Kittens! Cats!
Haiku # 70089, February 14, 2021 4:01 am ET
by You Know of It’s True
It's good to be home.
But it's better to be in
the local brothel.
Haiku # 70088, February 13, 2021 12:14 pm ET
by Valentines Day and Venereal Disease of Like chocolate and peanut butter. Extra crunchy.
Not all that funny.
Not boner inspiring.
Not worth watching it.
Haiku # 70087, February 13, 2021 12:11 pm ET
by Mr. Negativity w/ slow internet.
i had to share this
because it is just so good
trust me, you'll love it


https://youtu.be/BZlRt05RY9Y
Haiku # 70086, February 13, 2021 4:08 am ET
by ash
Sylvester Stallone
Sweaty underwear. Skid marks.
Raw egg in tall glass
Haiku # 70085, February 12, 2021 11:08 pm ET
by Noticer of Details
Chair Aerobics Class
Lift, lift, lift the left butt cheek
Fart! Fart! Feel the Burn!
Haiku # 70084, February 12, 2021 7:15 pm ET
by Funtcart of Roast Beef Explosion
New dance routine
First, remove all of your clothes
(release the fire ants)
Haiku # 70083, February 12, 2021 5:28 pm ET
by Juh Juh Juh Jitterbug of Wham! UK
Under the covers
you will find the dutch oven
It's your wake up call
Haiku # 70082, February 12, 2021 4:54 pm ET
by Methane Windmill of Worst Case, Ontario
Under the covers
doesn't matter how you look
we are all the same
Haiku # 70081, February 12, 2021 11:26 am ET
by Ellen Urowitz of Toronto Ontario
Golden yellow leaves
spotted in middle winter
in Toronto
Haiku # 70080, February 12, 2021 11:22 am ET
by Ellen Urowitz of Toronto Ontario
Pednecrozoophile.
Dead baby anilmal sex.
Stinky puppet show.
Haiku # 70079, February 12, 2021 4:33 am ET
by Nuclear war will cleanse the planet of the filth we have become.
Pednecrozoophile.
Dead baby anilmal sex.
Stinky puppet show.
Haiku # 70078, February 12, 2021 4:33 am ET
by Nuclear war will cleanse the planet of the filth we have become.
They forgot my fave
crunchy poop lovers dot org
asm dot org
Haiku # 70077, February 12, 2021 12:39 am ET
by blahblah
Call it sleepy seeds
Sandman filling the sand bag
Wake up with a smile
Haiku # 70075, February 11, 2021 6:16 pm ET
by Serta Sheep of Hiding
Orgasm on her
when awake if you love her,
asleep if it's hate.

Dot ru, of course.
R U a honey old man?
Come visit Russia.
Haiku # 70074, February 11, 2021 3:20 pm ET
by Borat of Very nice!
orgasm on loveawake.ru
Haiku # 70073, February 11, 2021 1:23 pm ET
by SandraNoitE of Spain
Don't trust lesbians.
They all have daddy issues.
And they want revenge.
Haiku # 70072, February 11, 2021 8:51 am ET
by Truth!
You can freeze to death.
I will take malaria
to that any day!
Haiku # 70071, February 11, 2021 12:57 am ET
by The only thing I need cold is beer. of And maybe pina colada. And ice cream.
A lot of cocaine
in the midwest nowadays.
Oh, no, that's just snow.

Ha ha ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Haiku # 70070, February 11, 2021 12:55 am ET
by Better you than me!
An itch I can’t scratch
Feeling of euphoria
I do wish to catch

Please open your door
That baggy that contains it
Oh the sweet snow coke
Haiku # 70069, February 11, 2021 12:18 am ET
by Line of lines
Can you imagine
getting a ride on his back?
He looks so friendly
Haiku # 70068, February 11, 2021 12:03 am ET
by Undisclosed of Purveyors of Haggis
A word to the wise
The Loch Ness Monster is NOT
a cephalopod
Haiku # 70067, February 10, 2021 11:58 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of Here for you
But I must confess
My first thought was that I saw
the Loch Ness Monster
Haiku # 70066, February 10, 2021 11:55 pm ET
by Lass of Slightly Used Bagpipe Shoppe
Your outboard motor
did certainly catch my eye
that day at the lake
Haiku # 70065, February 10, 2021 11:51 pm ET
by Nude Enthusiast behind the bush of Outdoors
I don't need to flash
at a nudist colony
with hot surfer chix.
Haiku # 70064, February 10, 2021 10:35 pm ET
by Surfing with dink out. of Sort of like paddle boarding.
How I picture you
Cool trench coat like Robert Stack
but flashing your dink
Haiku # 70063, February 10, 2021 8:38 pm ET
by Noticer of details of Solved Mystery
Quarantine Royale
Charles’ face, Camilla’s crumpet
Out comes marmalade
Haiku # 70062, February 10, 2021 8:26 pm ET
by Reptilian with blue balls of Fox Run (portable latrine)
Rare roast beef curtains
Horseradish makes you horny
Sam the Butcher’s load
Haiku # 70061, February 10, 2021 7:31 pm ET
by Alice (maid) of Meandering snailtrail
There once was a time
everyone tossed their urine
out of the window
Haiku # 70060, February 10, 2021 7:27 pm ET
by I. P. Frehley of Piss Jug Mountain
Don't visit much now.
Too much excremental filth.
Give the site to Darth.
Haiku # 70059, February 10, 2021 6:08 pm ET
by The New Look is Depressing
Bang that choco cup
into a whore's asshole with
a wooden paddle.

After which you may
suck out the peanut butter.
Post pics on Facebook.
Haiku # 70058, February 10, 2021 5:47 pm ET
by The Real Donald Trump
< 50 Less Recent Haiku 50 More Recent Haiku >