Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 40 Days and 77431 Haiku later...

Ate the scrabble tiles....
My next trip to the bathroom
Could spell disaster.
Haiku # 69327, January 2, 2021 8:29 am ET
by Stole this one from a meme
Barefoot restaurant.
The choppy waves here scare me.
I won't eat live food.
Haiku # 69326, January 2, 2021 5:44 am ET
by I will watch you.
After 40 years
I want to bang Mary Ann
high on Mary Jane.
Haiku # 69325, January 2, 2021 5:40 am ET
by Then, not now, of course!
The Fonz paid his girls.
Elephants are not stupid.
Her taint was soooo clean.
Haiku # 69324, January 2, 2021 5:36 am ET
by Unheard of. of You should take note.
I don't understand.
She stuck her gum underneath.
Pickles and salmon.
Haiku # 69323, January 2, 2021 5:33 am ET
by Covid has HIV strands. of The war has just begun.
Vaginal steaming
Remember Gwyneth Paltrow
Where's the tuna fish?
Haiku # 69322, January 2, 2021 5:15 am ET
by Posh Woman of Sitting in goop
I can feel your pain.
To lose weight, just eat ice cubes.
The wall is ugly.
Haiku # 69321, January 2, 2021 5:08 am ET
by Panda bear chopstick holders. of Theft is childish.
I done got fucked up.
They canceled tonight's opera.
There's way too much cheese.
Haiku # 69320, January 2, 2021 5:04 am ET
by The moon has lost weight. of Look how fat Trump is now.
Hawaiian music.
Kung Pao chicken and lo mein.
She has no boobies.
Haiku # 69319, January 2, 2021 5:00 am ET
by Coke with salted lime is, of course Conan the Barbarian's favorite drink.
Penguin poo on shoe.
Superman does not approve.
Eat the black lotus.
Haiku # 69318, January 2, 2021 4:55 am ET
by Mumra of Made peace with Thundercats.
L.O.S.E.R.
written all over his face
orange and pouty
Haiku # 69317, January 2, 2021 3:16 am ET
by ash
Bad Haiku News

UK Covid strain
now in US and China
the death toll rises
Haiku # 69316, January 1, 2021 12:12 pm ET
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
happier new year
we will see, are we clear here
its all in the wrist
Haiku # 69315, January 1, 2021 6:52 am ET
by vhs
Sir, these dink poems
They are not Darth's handiwork
He's not a female
Haiku # 69314, January 1, 2021 1:08 am ET
by Emily Dinkinson of My dusty room
Another new year
To read disgusting bad verse,
Most of it by Darth.
Haiku # 69313, January 1, 2021 12:29 am ET
by Sublime Haiku of The Celestial Poets
The little rascal
As an extra precaution
wears a Covid mask
Haiku # 69312, December 31, 2020 11:19 pm ET
by And A Tuxedo and Top Hat of A Rain Slicker and Monocle like Mr. Peanut
Exiting the bar
Escorting this well dressed dink
home for a night cap
Haiku # 69311, December 31, 2020 11:15 pm ET
by Escort of Dapper Dink of In Good Hands
You seem stuck on "dinks".
You need a resolution
to start this new year.
Haiku # 69310, December 31, 2020 10:14 pm ET
by Don't think of dink, think of stinky pink washed in the sink.
Have you ever seen
a tuxedo wearing dink
have one too many?
Haiku # 69309, December 31, 2020 8:39 pm ET
by Neat Freak, mopping of Under old willow
Solitary dink
All dressed up. Nowhere to go.
Soft music playing
Haiku # 69308, December 31, 2020 8:36 pm ET
by Drunk of Waiting for my balls to drop
Phallic Apparel
Soft satin, matching top hat
Penis Tuxedo
Haiku # 69307, December 31, 2020 8:30 pm ET
by Dink Penguin of Iceberg
The Polite Penis
"Pardon my not average size"
"Let me get that door"
Haiku # 69306, December 31, 2020 8:07 pm ET
by Genitalman of About Town
It's Masturbation
Invitation to the orgy
but no one shows up
Haiku # 69305, December 31, 2020 8:01 pm ET
by Harry Palmer of Going Blind ( I think)
A voice from beyond
"Suck my dead New Year's Eve dink!"
It's his one night out
Haiku # 69304, December 31, 2020 7:43 pm ET
by Epstein's Mother of Excusing Dick Clark's annual shenanigans
Better watch your heads.
Went for a long walk today.
Raining coconuts.
Haiku # 69303, December 31, 2020 5:57 pm ET
by If a coconut hits your coconut, you might have a bad day. of 2021, will it be any better? Time will tell.
Invented money
lowers the dollar value.
Stimulate here, pal.
Haiku # 69302, December 31, 2020 5:53 pm ET
by Fuck money. of Who needs it???!!!
And in other news,
how many times have you wanked
over Mary Ann?
Haiku # 69301, December 31, 2020 5:50 pm ET
by Survey says 790 of She was sooooo hot in her little island shorts.
Turkey McConnell
Gobbles, jiggling his wattles
(unpardoned RINO)
Haiku # 69300, December 31, 2020 8:32 am ET
by Get Stuffed of Stuffing
Bad Haiku News


Landslide in Norway
Gilligan's Mary Ann dead
Ticketmaster fined
Haiku # 69299, December 31, 2020 6:39 am ET
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Don't contaminate
sea gull poo with your gross head.
Green earth policy.
Haiku # 69298, December 31, 2020 6:01 am ET
by Beach boobies bounce beautifully by boardwalks. of Sandy shores shine shimmering.
A day at the beach
Seagulls drank suntan lotion
and shit on our heads
Haiku # 69297, December 31, 2020 4:38 am ET
by Shithead of Beach
If it's for sale,
I'll buy it for a dollar.
And a magic cow.

Walking in the sun.
Barefoot with reef cuts on feet.
Along a beach road.
Haiku # 69296, December 31, 2020 1:05 am ET
by I laugh at your covid waves. of The ocean is all that's real.
Space available
17 syllables max.
420 friendly
Haiku # 69295, December 30, 2020 7:32 pm ET
by Landlady of Highku Towers
Ghosts rattling chains.
Wait, nope, that was just my kids.
Up playing Roblox.
Haiku # 69294, December 30, 2020 10:58 am ET
by Getting drunk and killing people. of They should do it for real, like we did when kids.
Funny how commies
are more capitalist than
we Americans.
Haiku # 69293, December 30, 2020 12:48 am ET
by Organized Grime. of Grimy organs.
Can we nuke them now?!
China and Russia, I mean.
Unbearable SPAM.
Haiku # 69292, December 30, 2020 12:25 am ET
by If you're going to fuck me, at least buy me dinner first. of Useless motherfuckers.
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Haiku # 69291, December 30, 2020 12:00 am ET
by Natashuol86 of Russia
Jose L. Calva
He's the Cannibal Poet
or he might be Darth
Haiku # 69290, December 29, 2020 10:21 pm ET
by Longpig Laureate of Possibly right here
Here's my dilema:
Which part of you will look best
to make a necklace?

Your fat lying tongue.
Or shrivelled up clitoris.
Maybe your nipples.

Ears are too cliche.
They did that in Viet Nam.
Born in wrong era.
Haiku # 69289, December 29, 2020 10:10 pm ET
by I'll sleep on it.... with a boner. of The FBI aleardy knows. Dont waste your time.
I must ask if you
notice how much I hate you.
Blow torch and grinder.
Haiku # 69288, December 29, 2020 9:57 pm ET
by Torture Chamber Charlie of Quality, not quantity.
It doesn't look tiny
in the dick picture you sent
(I had it enlarged)
Haiku # 69287, December 29, 2020 9:43 pm ET
by Well Developed of Dark Room
The First Annual
Serial Killer Parade
Coming to your town
Haiku # 69286, December 29, 2020 9:39 pm ET
by Making room for you in my trunk of Mapping out potential secondary locations
No need to worry.
I'm sure you do not know them.
Jimmy Dean's secret.
Haiku # 69285, December 29, 2020 9:22 pm ET
by Uncle Ed.
ed gein again, i
do not want to fucking know
who went in the sausages...
Haiku # 69284, December 29, 2020 5:42 pm ET
by vhs
Darth in your bedroom.
Wearing a real woman's skin.
I pfefer Ed Gein.
Haiku # 69283, December 29, 2020 5:15 pm ET
by Ed Gein beer stein. Made out of your skull. No brains to scoop. Ice cream you scream.
Vile live evil.
My penis is soooo tiny.
That's why I buy whores.
Haiku # 69282, December 29, 2020 5:09 pm ET
by Your mom says hi. of I removed her veil. Then put it back. One ugly ho!
Darth in the window
Wearing a woman's bathrobe
I love that Psycho
Haiku # 69281, December 29, 2020 1:52 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker Forever of Shower
He measures his dink
Darth can figure out the math
He rigged the system
Haiku # 69280, December 29, 2020 1:46 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of Haiku Central
I figured it out.
Darth Figpucker is a bot
programmed to be vile.
Haiku # 69279, December 29, 2020 9:43 am ET
by Algorithm of Pessimism
Organic Cheetos
with beluga caviar
and Dom Perignon.
Haiku # 69278, December 29, 2020 8:35 am ET
by Oprah's vagina with teeth. of And a handgun.
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