The Fonz paid his girls.
Elephants are not stupid.
Her taint was soooo clean.
by Unheard of. of You should take note.
I don't understand.
She stuck her gum underneath.
Pickles and salmon.
by Covid has HIV strands. of The war has just begun.
Vaginal steaming
Remember Gwyneth Paltrow
Where's the tuna fish?
by Posh Woman of Sitting in goop
I can feel your pain.
To lose weight, just eat ice cubes.
The wall is ugly.
by Panda bear chopstick holders. of Theft is childish.
I done got fucked up.
They canceled tonight's opera.
There's way too much cheese.
by The moon has lost weight. of Look how fat Trump is now.
Hawaiian music.
Kung Pao chicken and lo mein.
She has no boobies.
by Coke with salted lime is, of course Conan the Barbarian's favorite drink.
Penguin poo on shoe.
Superman does not approve.
Eat the black lotus.
by Mumra of Made peace with Thundercats.
L.O.S.E.R.
written all over his face
orange and pouty
by ash
Bad Haiku News
UK Covid strain
now in US and China
the death toll rises
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
happier new year
we will see, are we clear here
its all in the wrist
by vhs
Sir, these dink poems
They are not Darth's handiwork
He's not a female
by Emily Dinkinson of My dusty room
Another new year
To read disgusting bad verse,
Most of it by Darth.
by Sublime Haiku of The Celestial Poets
The little rascal
As an extra precaution
wears a Covid mask
by And A Tuxedo and Top Hat of A Rain Slicker and Monocle like Mr. Peanut
Exiting the bar
Escorting this well dressed dink
home for a night cap
by Escort of Dapper Dink of In Good Hands
You seem stuck on "dinks".
You need a resolution
to start this new year.
by Don't think of dink, think of stinky pink washed in the sink.
Have you ever seen
a tuxedo wearing dink
have one too many?
by Neat Freak, mopping of Under old willow
Solitary dink
All dressed up. Nowhere to go.
Soft music playing
by Drunk of Waiting for my balls to drop
Phallic Apparel
Soft satin, matching top hat
Penis Tuxedo
by Dink Penguin of Iceberg
The Polite Penis
"Pardon my not average size"
"Let me get that door"
by Genitalman of About Town
It's Masturbation
Invitation to the orgy
but no one shows up
by Harry Palmer of Going Blind ( I think)
A voice from beyond
"Suck my dead New Year's Eve dink!"
It's his one night out
by Epstein's Mother of Excusing Dick Clark's annual shenanigans
Better watch your heads.
Went for a long walk today.
Raining coconuts.
by If a coconut hits your coconut, you might have a bad day. of 2021, will it be any better? Time will tell.
Invented money
lowers the dollar value.
Stimulate here, pal.
by Fuck money. of Who needs it???!!!
And in other news,
how many times have you wanked
over Mary Ann?
by Survey says 790 of She was sooooo hot in her little island shorts.
Turkey McConnell
Gobbles, jiggling his wattles
(unpardoned RINO)
by Get Stuffed of Stuffing
Bad Haiku News
Landslide in Norway
Gilligan's Mary Ann dead
Ticketmaster fined
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Don't contaminate
sea gull poo with your gross head.
Green earth policy.
by Beach boobies bounce beautifully by boardwalks. of Sandy shores shine shimmering.
A day at the beach
Seagulls drank suntan lotion
and shit on our heads
by Shithead of Beach
If it's for sale,
I'll buy it for a dollar.
And a magic cow.
Walking in the sun.
Barefoot with reef cuts on feet.
Along a beach road.
by I laugh at your covid waves. of The ocean is all that's real.
Space available
17 syllables max.
420 friendly
by Landlady of Highku Towers
Ghosts rattling chains.
Wait, nope, that was just my kids.
Up playing Roblox.
by Getting drunk and killing people. of They should do it for real, like we did when kids.
Funny how commies
are more capitalist than
we Americans.
by Organized Grime. of Grimy organs.
Can we nuke them now?!
China and Russia, I mean.
Unbearable SPAM.
by If you're going to fuck me, at least buy me dinner first. of Useless motherfuckers.
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by Natashuol86 of Russia
Jose L. Calva
He's the Cannibal Poet
or he might be Darth
by Longpig Laureate of Possibly right here
Here's my dilema:
Which part of you will look best
to make a necklace?
Your fat lying tongue.
Or shrivelled up clitoris.
Maybe your nipples.
Ears are too cliche.
They did that in Viet Nam.
Born in wrong era.
by I'll sleep on it.... with a boner. of The FBI aleardy knows. Dont waste your time.
I must ask if you
notice how much I hate you.
Blow torch and grinder.
by Torture Chamber Charlie of Quality, not quantity.
It doesn't look tiny
in the dick picture you sent
(I had it enlarged)
by Well Developed of Dark Room
The First Annual
Serial Killer Parade
Coming to your town
by Making room for you in my trunk of Mapping out potential secondary locations
No need to worry.
I'm sure you do not know them.
Jimmy Dean's secret.
by Uncle Ed.
ed gein again, i
do not want to fucking know
who went in the sausages...
by vhs
Darth in your bedroom.
Wearing a real woman's skin.
I pfefer Ed Gein.
by Ed Gein beer stein. Made out of your skull. No brains to scoop. Ice cream you scream.
Vile live evil.
My penis is soooo tiny.
That's why I buy whores.
by Your mom says hi. of I removed her veil. Then put it back. One ugly ho!
Darth in the window
Wearing a woman's bathrobe
I love that Psycho
by Darth Figpucker Forever of Shower
He measures his dink
Darth can figure out the math
He rigged the system
by Noticer of Details of Haiku Central
I figured it out.
Darth Figpucker is a bot
programmed to be vile.
by Algorithm of Pessimism
Organic Cheetos
with beluga caviar
and Dom Perignon.
by Oprah's vagina with teeth. of And a handgun.
I'm a Dorito.
Eat my triangular ass.
God that was cheesy.
by With cream cheese salmon dip. of Oprah tested and approved.
7-11
I'll be the one who looks baked
Eating Doritos
by Haiku Hookup of Corner
Free Legal Advice
Channeled through the departed
Theodore Bundy
by Person in trance of Barstool
