Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 188 Days and 77101 Haiku later...

Another new year
To read disgusting bad verse,
Most of it by Darth.
Haiku # 69313, January 1, 2021 12:29 am ET
by Sublime Haiku of The Celestial Poets
The little rascal
As an extra precaution
wears a Covid mask
Haiku # 69312, December 31, 2020 11:19 pm ET
by And A Tuxedo and Top Hat of A Rain Slicker and Monocle like Mr. Peanut
Exiting the bar
Escorting this well dressed dink
home for a night cap
Haiku # 69311, December 31, 2020 11:15 pm ET
by Escort of Dapper Dink of In Good Hands
You seem stuck on "dinks".
You need a resolution
to start this new year.
Haiku # 69310, December 31, 2020 10:14 pm ET
by Don't think of dink, think of stinky pink washed in the sink.
Have you ever seen
a tuxedo wearing dink
have one too many?
Haiku # 69309, December 31, 2020 8:39 pm ET
by Neat Freak, mopping of Under old willow
Solitary dink
All dressed up. Nowhere to go.
Soft music playing
Haiku # 69308, December 31, 2020 8:36 pm ET
by Drunk of Waiting for my balls to drop
Phallic Apparel
Soft satin, matching top hat
Penis Tuxedo
Haiku # 69307, December 31, 2020 8:30 pm ET
by Dink Penguin of Iceberg
The Polite Penis
"Pardon my not average size"
"Let me get that door"
Haiku # 69306, December 31, 2020 8:07 pm ET
by Genitalman of About Town
It's Masturbation
Invitation to the orgy
but no one shows up
Haiku # 69305, December 31, 2020 8:01 pm ET
by Harry Palmer of Going Blind ( I think)
A voice from beyond
"Suck my dead New Year's Eve dink!"
It's his one night out
Haiku # 69304, December 31, 2020 7:43 pm ET
by Epstein's Mother of Excusing Dick Clark's annual shenanigans
Better watch your heads.
Went for a long walk today.
Raining coconuts.
Haiku # 69303, December 31, 2020 5:57 pm ET
by If a coconut hits your coconut, you might have a bad day. of 2021, will it be any better? Time will tell.
Invented money
lowers the dollar value.
Stimulate here, pal.
Haiku # 69302, December 31, 2020 5:53 pm ET
by Fuck money. of Who needs it???!!!
And in other news,
how many times have you wanked
over Mary Ann?
Haiku # 69301, December 31, 2020 5:50 pm ET
by Survey says 790 of She was sooooo hot in her little island shorts.
Turkey McConnell
Gobbles, jiggling his wattles
(unpardoned RINO)
Haiku # 69300, December 31, 2020 8:32 am ET
by Get Stuffed of Stuffing
Bad Haiku News


Landslide in Norway
Gilligan's Mary Ann dead
Ticketmaster fined
Haiku # 69299, December 31, 2020 6:39 am ET
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Don't contaminate
sea gull poo with your gross head.
Green earth policy.
Haiku # 69298, December 31, 2020 6:01 am ET
by Beach boobies bounce beautifully by boardwalks. of Sandy shores shine shimmering.
A day at the beach
Seagulls drank suntan lotion
and shit on our heads
Haiku # 69297, December 31, 2020 4:38 am ET
by Shithead of Beach
If it's for sale,
I'll buy it for a dollar.
And a magic cow.

Walking in the sun.
Barefoot with reef cuts on feet.
Along a beach road.
Haiku # 69296, December 31, 2020 1:05 am ET
by I laugh at your covid waves. of The ocean is all that's real.
Space available
17 syllables max.
420 friendly
Haiku # 69295, December 30, 2020 7:32 pm ET
by Landlady of Highku Towers
Ghosts rattling chains.
Wait, nope, that was just my kids.
Up playing Roblox.
Haiku # 69294, December 30, 2020 10:58 am ET
by Getting drunk and killing people. of They should do it for real, like we did when kids.
Funny how commies
are more capitalist than
we Americans.
Haiku # 69293, December 30, 2020 12:48 am ET
by Organized Grime. of Grimy organs.
Can we nuke them now?!
China and Russia, I mean.
Unbearable SPAM.
Haiku # 69292, December 30, 2020 12:25 am ET
by If you're going to fuck me, at least buy me dinner first. of Useless motherfuckers.
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Haiku # 69291, December 30, 2020 12:00 am ET
by Natashuol86 of Russia
Jose L. Calva
He's the Cannibal Poet
or he might be Darth
Haiku # 69290, December 29, 2020 10:21 pm ET
by Longpig Laureate of Possibly right here
Here's my dilema:
Which part of you will look best
to make a necklace?

Your fat lying tongue.
Or shrivelled up clitoris.
Maybe your nipples.

Ears are too cliche.
They did that in Viet Nam.
Born in wrong era.
Haiku # 69289, December 29, 2020 10:10 pm ET
by I'll sleep on it.... with a boner. of The FBI aleardy knows. Dont waste your time.
I must ask if you
notice how much I hate you.
Blow torch and grinder.
Haiku # 69288, December 29, 2020 9:57 pm ET
by Torture Chamber Charlie of Quality, not quantity.
It doesn't look tiny
in the dick picture you sent
(I had it enlarged)
Haiku # 69287, December 29, 2020 9:43 pm ET
by Well Developed of Dark Room
The First Annual
Serial Killer Parade
Coming to your town
Haiku # 69286, December 29, 2020 9:39 pm ET
by Making room for you in my trunk of Mapping out potential secondary locations
No need to worry.
I'm sure you do not know them.
Jimmy Dean's secret.
Haiku # 69285, December 29, 2020 9:22 pm ET
by Uncle Ed.
ed gein again, i
do not want to fucking know
who went in the sausages...
Haiku # 69284, December 29, 2020 5:42 pm ET
by vhs
Darth in your bedroom.
Wearing a real woman's skin.
I pfefer Ed Gein.
Haiku # 69283, December 29, 2020 5:15 pm ET
by Ed Gein beer stein. Made out of your skull. No brains to scoop. Ice cream you scream.
Vile live evil.
My penis is soooo tiny.
That's why I buy whores.
Haiku # 69282, December 29, 2020 5:09 pm ET
by Your mom says hi. of I removed her veil. Then put it back. One ugly ho!
Darth in the window
Wearing a woman's bathrobe
I love that Psycho
Haiku # 69281, December 29, 2020 1:52 pm ET
by Darth Figpucker Forever of Shower
He measures his dink
Darth can figure out the math
He rigged the system
Haiku # 69280, December 29, 2020 1:46 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of Haiku Central
I figured it out.
Darth Figpucker is a bot
programmed to be vile.
Haiku # 69279, December 29, 2020 9:43 am ET
by Algorithm of Pessimism
Organic Cheetos
with beluga caviar
and Dom Perignon.
Haiku # 69278, December 29, 2020 8:35 am ET
by Oprah's vagina with teeth. of And a handgun.
I'm a Dorito.
Eat my triangular ass.
God that was cheesy.
Haiku # 69277, December 29, 2020 3:18 am ET
by With cream cheese salmon dip. of Oprah tested and approved.
7-11
I'll be the one who looks baked
Eating Doritos
Haiku # 69276, December 28, 2020 8:44 pm ET
by Haiku Hookup of Corner
Free Legal Advice
Channeled through the departed
Theodore Bundy
Haiku # 69275, December 28, 2020 8:39 pm ET
by Person in trance of Barstool
If you plug your "arse",
global warming will subside
and life will rejoice.

Upon your demise
we will launch you into space
to save the planet.
Haiku # 69274, December 28, 2020 7:54 pm ET
by EPA 42 U.S.C. §13101 et seq. (1990)
Fines just aren't enough
Overdue library books
Electric chair ride
Haiku # 69273, December 28, 2020 7:10 pm ET
by Doobies Decimals and Decibels of High
I'll have a Dilly
The Orignal Snack Bar
Between Eve's legs
Haiku # 69272, December 28, 2020 7:05 pm ET
by Bruh, this is Adam ( from the Bible) of Digging in to Bottomless Clams!
Bad Haiku News

Trump signs Relief bill
a Chinese journalist jailed
Ancient 'snack bar' found
Haiku # 69271, December 28, 2020 1:28 pm ET
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Methane Lottery
Hold your head up to my arse
for today's numbers
Haiku # 69270, December 28, 2020 12:54 pm ET
by Buy a Ticket of This Could Be Your Shitty Day!
Numerology.
It means as much to me as
gynecology.
Haiku # 69269, December 28, 2020 10:49 am ET
by When was your llast exam?
I enjoyed your fart.
It reminds me of balot
and strong vinegar.
Haiku # 69268, December 28, 2020 10:44 am ET
by I still won't try monkey meat.
I asked my kids that.
They say their online freinds care.
And that I do not.

Is ten years of age
too soon to kick out the house?
Relax! I'm joking!
Haiku # 69267, December 28, 2020 10:39 am ET
by Fingers worked to the bone. of One foot in the grave.
i was asked why do
i bother with online folks
missing on real life?
Haiku # 69266, December 28, 2020 10:14 am ET
by vhs
There's someone to blame
when your conjoined twin lets wind
(Besides your old dog)
Haiku # 69265, December 28, 2020 4:54 am ET
by Fartfucius of Under old willow
If they both feel it
When conjoined twins get it on
is it called incest?
Haiku # 69264, December 28, 2020 4:39 am ET
by People Person of USA!!
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