I'll sit at my desk,
shirk responsibility,
and wait for my beer.

My cousin gave birth
To a giant stick insect.
Boy, is it ugly!

But still she loves it.
The mother-child bond is strong
Twixt woman and bug.

I look at the clock
The second hand ticks slower
Where, then, is the third?

Wednesday is dull,
I watch the second hand crawl.
Move faster, damnit!

us three talked lastnight
as always it was intense
so hard when we cry

eat fish with salt
harass the spacehopper
who knows it might bite

I am sniffling
Yet, there are comics to be sold
Imminent herbology

I wake up frozen.
Someone's stolen my duvet.
Jesus, not again!

Haiku? MR. T don't know no Haiku
MR.T pitties the fool who writes Haiku
Stop all this jibba jabba he says

Oh silly puppy,
Chasing ev'ry passing car...
What if you caught one?

i love haiku, but
is this site a message board?
please kaiku only

I am so ashamed
I should not have named you so
My humblest sorry

who are you, you Q?
and why put my name up too
shouldn't have you know!

Q, with Sanjuro
Is not Sanjuro, no way
it is only me

Work for domino?
I would rather die slowly.
Not for me I fear.

oops, i have farted
please do not look so alarmed
i had beans for tea

Oh, the trees are gay
trippy trippy la la la
Where's me hat Stanley

Mr Lipanzerman
a purveyor of fine cheese
and insect trousers

My oh my, I'm a
tree surgeon from South
Borneo, ooh ooh

Where is the big brain?
It has nice fashion sense
Ow, the large cat said

when judo training
you must fall down ten times but
get up eleven

Coming to LA?
Do swing by Mr T's Bowl
It's in Highland Park

Spent the evening there
Tonight, as my days here wane
It was quite a scene

In search of a vibe
It's the one that I've wanted
Mellow, Fucked Up, Kind.

and the tap drips drip
drip drip drip drip drip drip drip
it's always the same

acceleration?
spiralling our of control
my head is spinning

call an exorcist
all I hear is fingers tap
tap tap tap tapping

hurtling through a life
on a tiny blue marble
surfing the abyss

I get this feeling
I'm in motion, a certain
sense of liberty

accelerated
moving somewhere at a rate
poets in motion

James Van Der Beek's dog
Barked loudly, as if to say:
"I love Dawson's Creek!"

George W. Bush
Spilt his breakfast on the floor
And wept like a child.

My wicked uncle
Kidnapped my sister and me.
God, I hate that guy!

there once was a dude named Norm
whose poems just wouldn't conform.
his demise at the hands
of bad haiku fans
shall forever be mourned.

six five ninety one
play it forwards and backwards
still makes no sense. Huh?

blip bloop gloppity
glif gloop frippity nop nip
noop scrip fleeble glah!

ive got the straight edge
minus the connotations
i miss ian mckaye

that was weird lilliey
we submitted together
fucked up...don't you think?

The steps start to move
Fall down outside, bust my head
DAMMIT! Im DRUNNNK - again

children are starving
where is the giant nipple?
we're all gonna die!

believe in jesus
do you want to go to hell?
want to buy a book?

raised in the jungle
my father has no good teeth
so what good am i?

i have no honor
i'm sorry for my manners
chicken too tasty

rules of engagement
honorable haiku fight
bow down 3 times now!

LOSE FACE THEN NEW FACE!
must be changing names when lose,
victorious wins

HAIKU 3-5-3
short sword! HAIKU 5-7-5
long sword, now you know!

fast and furious
tolerate no cockroaches
committed to my biscuits

g'night

That's okay, really.
I'd quote more, but sleep beckons.
Good night, future boy!

here and now, don't leave
me high and broken.
rats...don't know Ani

Letters to Cleo.
Radiohead. Nine Inch Nails.
Ani DiFranco.

international
i spring into my suitcase
write home to mama

cursed with slow network,
I enviously watch them
type many many Haiku.

fingerfood looks up
and then enlightenment dawns
who turned the lights on?

my coca-cola
caffeine surging through bloodstreams
it's past my bed time