Hairy frog and I
But wait, it isn't a frog
My penis has warts
by Riddip of Lily pad
I'm the headless twin!
Did you just ASSUME my head?!
That's so UN-PC!
by df
MY SPOON IS TOO BIG!
by Fom of Gesh
Somehow I picture
Marilyn Manson smoking
the Royal Feces.
by df
I read it somewhere
That Queen Elizabeth's poop
Has to be burned up
by Noticer of Details of Behind binoculars
I AM A BANANA
by Fesh of Glom
Rat a tat tat peck
Peck peck rat a tat tat
Shut up woodpecker!
by Ann Noyed
Hey Darth Figpucker
Does your conjoined headless twin
Write these bad poems?
by Poet of Know it
Grandpa got confused
When he went to milk the cows
He jerked off instead
by Don't drink the milk of It's spoiled
They just start out raw
Cooking brings out the flavor
Stop jerking off please!
by Chef of Miami Spooj
With so much bad food
there's no choice but eat people.
Either that or rats.
by Now that I think about it, the rats are cleaner.
If they are STEWING,
how on earth can they be RAW?
... Shit, now I'm hungry.
by Guess no diet today, damnitall.
Echolocation
We have tracked your flatulence
You're bat shit crazy!
by Fart Knower of In the vicinity
Raw human beings
Stewing in their own juices
Figpucker Island
by Chamber of Commerce of Figpucker Island
Barbershop quartet
Four fart flatus harmony
Not a mass shooting
by Gassy Jack of Loading up on beans
Halfway through the sand
Why did they bury me here?
The sun is sinking
by A. Bandoned of With a submerged boner
Hospitality
Found between the open legs
Of a gorilla
by Gorilla fancier of In the mist
Co-op-era-tion.
Yip yip yip yip yip, uh huh.
Yip yip yip yip yip.
by Marshun
Yip scram fram glom bom
Merple dormy hramp mong bip
Strabble grok strop frop
by Fesh of Glom
Flerma scrom tizda
Hepta glom scrag hlang mangmang
Fesh fesh groo jung yoo
by Fesh of Glom
They who masturbate
whilst contemplating livestock
are my soul brethren.
by Darth Figpucker, The Highly Inappropriate
I plowed Buzz Lightyear
One more off the bucket list
Next up is Woody
by BHTizzie
I think I know him!
Does your brother ride a horse?
--Your, Ichabod Crane
by
Two beers, rum & Coke,
and a tall Bloody Mary.
My head is fuzzy.
Now I need coffee.
What a horrible junkie.
Freebasing caffeine.
by Freebase caffeine is not just an urban legend. It will fuck you up.
Well fuck me running!
That's a goddamn good poem.
I think I'll jack off.
by df of twin w/ head, you are awesome!
Conjoined headless twin
Mother always liked you best
Life is so unfair
by Other twin of With fully formed head
the world keeps turning
even if i'm still asleep
the planet isn't
by ash
Ignite your poem.
Might singe the hairs on your taint.
Goes out with a bang.
Then by that regards
cows are the world's best poets.
Hungry for burgers?
by Invisible Literature
I wrote a poem
But instead of using words
I used methane gas
by Hairy Asshole of Chair
It wasn't special.
Not very big and brownish.
The pic's on Facebook.
by
I'll go take a dump.
Then I'll tell you about it.
Get comfortable.
by
One voice is my ass.
Listen to words of wisdom.
Parooooot-a-toot-toot.
by That is pure truth!
The best voice ever
Belongs to Jeanine Piero
White nationalist
by VHS's pappy
One voice is reason.
One voice stinks of excrement.
Choose well which is which.
by HAIKU haikuhaikuhaiku of up your HAIKU
Hey Beto O'Dork
You got a haircut wow cool!
On TV good job!
And you ride skate boards!
Excellent qualifiers !
for useful idiot!
by Baron Urern Von Sternberg of Mongolia
Igniting flatus.
Do you have the balls to try?
Careful! Don't burn them!
by Reduce Green house Gasses, light your farts. of Methane is far worse of a greenhouse gas than CO2, so burn your farts to save the earth!
Written on the wind
Timeless, smelly brown smudges
Nose poems. Breathe Deep
by All for you
I almost read it
Form of written flatulence
Your signature verse
by Chairman of the Bored
I have used corn starch
For rear end irritation
And making gravy
by Not Food Safe Certified of Kitchen
Ever fuck Jello
while you are high on corn starch?
Then you haven't lived.
by Bill Cosby of If it wiggles and it's wet, stick it in.
Participation
Masturbation requires some
But you're too lazy
by Noticer of Details of Behind binoculars
Ever snort corn starch?
Have you ever fucked Jello?
It's never too late
by Helpful
I done got fucked up.
Butt-chugged me some paint thinner.
My farts smell like pine.
by Bubba Boofsalot of Texass
Everybody knows
Elevators take more time
With a Fart on-board
by Gassy Jack of Elevators
Just enjoyed primo
carabao capuccino.
Urge to roll in mud.
by Do you have any wagons that you need me to pull? of Bellow, grunt, snort.
A gay poet wrote
on worms in his urethra;
he'd let them crawl in.
You said nightcrawlers.
I thought maybe you know him.
Hey, you could swap worms.
A new gay sex thing.
And you get to tell your friends,
you heard it here first.
by His name was Darren of The Native American race.
Capitalists blow
the whore the Lard Jesus Christ
and spit on themselves.
by Stalin's pet ferrett of The 328th generation.
Communists will bow
Before the Lord Jesus Christ
in spite of themselves.
by Epiphany of Dialectical Revelation
First dumb them all down
With organized religion
Then sell salvation
by Blueray
Can't go to Poland !
Might need to nuke Hurricane !
Nuke the storm BIGLY
by Donald Ass Trump of Near button