BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
23 Years
311 Days
68090 Haikus
Wong Lofan just dreams
About beer and pussy past
en route to A.A.
Haiku #62047, by Sorry you grew old of Happens to Most of Us
February 8, 2019 7:59 pm ET

No one here is lost
See, you've come to the right place
And I'm glad you're here
Haiku #62046, by Noticer of Details
February 8, 2019 7:58 pm ET

I can't say enough
About how lost you all are.
So stay fucking lost.
Haiku #62045, by I am not a Loving Christian of Course
February 8, 2019 7:46 pm ET

I dare you to come
To this pathetic website.
STEP UP you pussy.
Haiku #62044, by I Taught Almighty God About Poetry
February 8, 2019 7:44 pm ET

Fuck you. Fuck your soul.
And your mind. And your spirit.
I hope you read this.
Haiku #62043, by I Taught Christ How To Love The Human Race
February 8, 2019 7:39 pm ET

That's right, Bad Haiku.
Lots of foul thoughts from lost souls.
No one dragged you here.
Haiku #62042, by Babylonian Captivity of Go to Hell
February 8, 2019 7:36 pm ET

DARTH. The guilty one.
Made me read about shit, shit,
Shit, shit and more shit.
Haiku #62041, by So wipe your Ass and get Over It of May You Be Spared
February 8, 2019 7:32 pm ET

Yes, you are guilty
of loading the internet
with foul stinking shit.
Haiku #62040, by So wipe your mouth and wipe your mind
February 8, 2019 7:27 pm ET

My wife has left me.
My inadequate haiku
drove her to Cuntfart.

Divorce court is next.
Cuntfart gets full custody
of all our children.

Please teach them haiku.
And sometimes take them fishing.
And please don't rape them.
Haiku #62039, by Darth Figpucker
February 8, 2019 7:23 pm ET

Hail, the Poo Flingers
Misunderstood throughout Time
Firm smelly handshake
Haiku #62038, by Noticer of Details of Emergency Room
February 8, 2019 7:18 pm ET

Crime: Constipation
Sentenced to life in prison
Free Free set me free
Haiku #62037, by Last line read in sing song voice of Sting
February 8, 2019 7:13 pm ET

at a certain age
the battle of the bulge is
literal gut wrench...
Haiku #62036, by vhs
February 8, 2019 7:13 pm ET

Hey that kinda smarts
No it's burning the skin off
Cauterize the hole
Haiku #62035, by Torturer of Incompetent ERDoctor of Fantasy
February 8, 2019 7:09 pm ET

He doesn't like poo
Read about it at med school
That shit is too real
Haiku #62034, by Observer of Idiots of This Emergency Room
February 8, 2019 6:57 pm ET

In my fantasy
Enema for the doctor
Fill it with acid
Haiku #62033, by Cat Raver of Rubber Room
February 8, 2019 6:27 pm ET

To tell you the truth
You start by not saying that
Will they ever learn?
Haiku #62032, by Liar of Liarsville
February 8, 2019 3:02 pm ET

Lord, how I would hate
to be born Figpucker's wife.
Deep levels of Hell.
Haiku #62031, by Does she like Haiku?
February 8, 2019 2:24 pm ET

They chased the Beatles
They chase my darning needle
It's Peenmania!
Haiku #62030, by Help! of Cavern Club (My wife's Cunt)
February 8, 2019 1:06 pm ET

See my Royal Peen
By appointment to the Queen
Admire my gold knob
Haiku #62029, by Gold Nob Bob of Look for the mob
February 8, 2019 1:04 pm ET

I peed in a sink
It's not as strange as you think
In London, England
Haiku #62028, by Downright Upright of Drinking a shandy outside the pub
February 8, 2019 1:02 pm ET

What the hell is this?!
Tampon in the urinal!
Getting out of hand.
Haiku #62027, by Transgender Substantiation Sanitation of I am toxic shocked!
February 8, 2019 9:59 am ET

We couldn
Haiku #62026, by On the run(s)
February 8, 2019 6:48 am ET

Remember Taiwan
Cold beer, warm girls, China seas
Shu lin kou station

Bought some green jade
And some yards of bright red silk
Carter you bastard!
Haiku #62025, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
February 8, 2019 6:02 am ET

How long has it been?
Since the last time I told you
Cuntfart Cuntfart Cunt
Haiku #62024, by Cuntfish of cunt
February 7, 2019 11:32 pm ET

Aluminum foil
Useful to wrap leftovers
Not as toilet paper
Haiku #62023, by Anonymous Poet
February 7, 2019 9:19 pm ET

Ghost. Patrick Swayzee.
Can a ghost ejaculate?
Does the Bible say?
Haiku #62022, by Smote Avoider of No Smoting Zone
February 7, 2019 7:51 pm ET

Come together now
All are beings who make wind
Breathe it in. Rejoice!
Haiku #62021, by Anonymous Poet
February 7, 2019 7:48 pm ET

So are you white or
and why should we breathe?
Haiku #62020, by Reified Isms of Ontology
February 7, 2019 7:21 pm ET

It's Earth, Wind and Fire.
That's what I am composed of.
Go figure me out.
Haiku #62019, by Yo Funked-Up Mama of 1976
February 7, 2019 7:19 pm ET

So are you black or
African American
and why do you care?
Haiku #62018, by Anonymous Poet
February 7, 2019 7:05 pm ET

Miss America
You got your legs wide open
American Pie
Haiku #62017, by Jack Hornier of Not little
February 7, 2019 5:30 pm ET

Sick of the routine:
sneak into America;
so -- no loyalty.
Haiku #62016, by Sustainability of Borders
February 7, 2019 5:23 pm ET

Some immigrants good;
but some never learn English.
Only want Dollar.
Haiku #62015, by Ass of Imilation
February 7, 2019 5:16 pm ET

She won't use her hands
Greedy chopsticks grab penis
Banned from the restaurant
Haiku #62014, by Dim Sum of Chinatown
February 7, 2019 4:00 pm ET

Stamp Collecting (Nerd)
Tonga Banana Stamp (Nerd)
Nerd Nerd Nerd Nerd Nerd
Haiku #62013, by Nerd of Post Office
February 7, 2019 3:56 pm ET

Miss you look so hot
In that sexy qi pao dress!
Don't call your lawyer.

Just a compliment
From a beat up old bastard
Who likes sexy girls.

War between sexes
Seems damn silly-to me
We are all human.

No more fun joking
Harmless flirting riske' fun
Its a sad damn thing..
Haiku #62012, by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
February 7, 2019 3:55 pm ET

Closet. Way in back.
MC Hammer's crazy pants
You can not touch them
Haiku #62011, by Me of Wayback
February 7, 2019 3:49 pm ET

Stale fortune cookie
Tasted it. Hard to swallow.
The texture is off
Haiku #62010, by Hungry of 20 minutes later
February 7, 2019 12:39 pm ET

Liberal women
talk talk talk talk talk talk talk...
and then keep talking.
Haiku #62009, by But Ann C. talks better
February 7, 2019 9:52 am ET

This page left intentionally blank.
Haiku #62008, by But now it's not blank. of Oh shit!
February 7, 2019 7:14 am ET

With that being said
With that being said fart fart
With that being said
Haiku #62007, by new law passed today of Must say before farting
February 7, 2019 5:18 am ET

Let the world end tonight
Will someone please pull the plug
Haiku #62006, by Done of Here
February 7, 2019 1:43 am ET

Readymade haiku
Just add water and voila
Bad Haiku Growbeast
Haiku #62005, by Junk of Made in China
February 7, 2019 1:38 am ET

For Valentine
Haiku #62004, by Flo of Mel
February 6, 2019 9:54 pm ET

Long winter evenings
Inches and centimeters
Measuring my Dong
Haiku #62003, by Big Mack of Whopper
February 6, 2019 9:50 pm ET

You ll be a millionaire
Haiku #62002, by Anonymous Poet
February 6, 2019 9:47 pm ET

Haiku #62001, by Anonymous Poet
February 6, 2019 9:22 pm ET

Haiku #62000, by Anonymous Poet
February 6, 2019 7:05 pm ET

Haiku #61999, by Anonymous Poet
February 6, 2019 6:55 pm ET

Dirty underwear
Will be the new currency
Haiku #61998, by Financial Advisor of Loot of the Fruit of the Loom
February 6, 2019 6:55 pm ET