BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
22 Years
311 Days
and
65997 Haikus
later...
have you read the poems
where Satan has three heads
and one mouth chews Judas
Iscariot for eternity????
Haiku #61101, by vhs
November 25, 2018 8:29 pm ET

poetry is for
the last chance of expression
of the hopeless the

haiku is the suicide
poem of the samurai...
Haiku #61100, by vhs of this isn't a haiku but I am tired of life today
November 25, 2018 8:24 pm ET

So who listened to
Alice's Restaurant this
last Thanksgiving day?
Haiku #61099, by Anonymous Poet
November 25, 2018 7:12 pm ET

Listening to AC/DC conjures up images of being shat upon by Satan whilst chained under his outhouse and he's having constipation and screaming, picking the scabs from a VD sore and flicking them down on top of you with the massive piles of shite at the very lowest level of hell.
Haiku #61098, by Anonymous Poet
November 25, 2018 7:10 pm ET

Dingleberry pie.
Just like grandma used to make.
Fresh from the oven.
Haiku #61097, by df
November 25, 2018 7:06 pm ET

Mona Lisa's cunt
Vertical smile mystery
Obvious tuna
Haiku #61096, by Leonardo of Hard on Department
November 25, 2018 6:42 pm ET

Zorg Zeguulon Zerr
Zygorx Zxrog zzzis zeguulon
Zguyx zx Zorg Zerr
Haiku #61095, by Zorg of Zeguulon
November 25, 2018 6:39 pm ET

Don't bother worry
That's just a waste of your time
Jerk off instead, man
Haiku #61094, by Anonymous Poet
November 25, 2018 6:27 pm ET

Zoom lens on asshole
Wrinkles. Hairs. Dingleberries.
I'll s(h)it on your face
Haiku #61093, by Zygorx of Sgrunx
November 25, 2018 6:14 pm ET

Awful twat waffle.
Eyeful of Eiffel Tower.
Fine wine art cheese fart.
Haiku #61092, by df of French fried frog fritters fraternity
November 25, 2018 5:04 pm ET

Haiku licks my ASS.
You are a lightweight ass-lick.
Do your best. Lightweight.
Haiku #61091, by Ass- cheeks of Transcedence
November 25, 2018 5:00 pm ET

Now you will read this.
Now you will acknowledge Truth
Or burn forever.
Haiku #61090, by Haiku condemns you out of time & money
November 25, 2018 4:44 pm ET

I will end Haiku.
You will lick my abstract ass.
You have no values.
Haiku #61089, by Ass Suck of Poetic Innovation
November 25, 2018 4:37 pm ET

John Podesta is
a total criminal and
Now he stands accused.
Haiku #61088, by Haiku of Ass-suck
November 25, 2018 4:32 pm ET

do i miss you much ?
even though you can't hear me
i certainly do
Haiku #61087, by ash
November 25, 2018 3:29 am ET

I'll start a website.
DarthFigpuckerNude dot com.
For true fans of mine.
Haiku #61086, by df
November 24, 2018 11:30 pm ET

The site is broken
It keeps cutting off my words!
Somebody! Please help!
Haiku #61085, by The owner of Vancie (Adam)
November 24, 2018 9:22 pm ET

*But, she
Haiku #61084, by Vancie
November 24, 2018 9:21 pm ET

Thank you, Starkitten!
Vancie is really happy
But, she
Haiku #61083, by Vancie
November 24, 2018 9:19 pm ET

Long pig twat waffle
Mosquito pork worms cuntfart
Skateboard cranium
Haiku #61082, by Figpucker Fanclub
November 24, 2018 6:24 pm ET

Vancie, you be good
It's hard not being naughty
Let me scratch your belly
Haiku #61081, by Vancie' friend, Starkitten
November 24, 2018 5:51 pm ET

Haiku.
Haiku #61080, by Anonymous Poet
November 24, 2018 10:08 am ET

Vancie is a dog
She is very very black
And she is a brat
Haiku #61079, by Vancie
November 24, 2018 10:06 am ET

Shimmy was a cunt
He stole our rolls of pennies
And bought tons of weed
Haiku #61078, by Rippin
November 24, 2018 4:23 am ET

Larvae puparium
Squidnick Centurion
If I named new cars
Haiku #61077, by Hi Koo
November 24, 2018 4:21 am ET

Radiating pain
into the neck from the brain
will make one insane.

Grabbing a handful
of synthetic opioids
like they were candy.

I'd rather grab tits.
Since I'm no politician
that would be okay.
Haiku #61076, by farty pants poopie face... or something
November 24, 2018 2:46 am ET

All are poetasters
And useless Turkey Basters
Yeah, and time wasters
Haiku #61075, by Outer Spacester
November 23, 2018 5:22 pm ET

Those aren
Haiku #61074, by Anonymous Poet
November 23, 2018 6:16 am ET

You might be the one
The greatest haiku poet
You
Haiku #61073, by Haiku Freak
November 23, 2018 6:12 am ET

Still at the table
They ate until their pants burst
Compared genitals
Haiku #61072, by I'd rather not say of Under the table
November 22, 2018 10:22 pm ET

We're having tacos
Believe me, there is no "Hell"
Some of us know that
Haiku #61071, by Anonymous Poet
November 22, 2018 7:39 pm ET

If you can't give thanks
Then burn in hell, ungrateful.
Haiku has no worth.
Haiku #61070, by Anonymous Poet
November 22, 2018 6:55 pm ET

Splatter of gravy?
Granted, I don't eat that much
C'mon, you miser!!
Haiku #61069, by John Boy Walton's Hangry Mole of John Boy Walton's face
November 22, 2018 4:11 pm ET

A hole in the pie
And Grandpa's looking sheepish
Pass the Werther's, please
Haiku #61068, by Anonymous Poet
November 22, 2018 3:01 pm ET

Moist moist moist moist moist
Moist moist moist moist moist moist moist
Moist moist moist moist moist
Haiku #61067, by Moist person of Moist place
November 22, 2018 11:36 am ET

Screwing roast turkey?
It's not beastiality.
It's making gravy.

Or you might call it,
ahem, BASTE-iality.
Pre-stuffing the bird.
Haiku #61066, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 22, 2018 7:12 am ET

Asking for a friend
Screwing a turkey carcass..
Biestiality?
Haiku #61065, by I'd rather not say
November 22, 2018 4:31 am ET

Leftover pumpkins
Grab one off your neighbour's porch
Headless Horseman Time!!
Haiku #61064, by Fun Person
November 22, 2018 2:14 am ET

dear americans
though your president's a twat
we love you long time
Haiku #61063, by ash
November 22, 2018 1:50 am ET

there once was a poem from me
to show how said limericks be
the pattern of rhyme
and their rhythmic time
is exactly as you can now see
Haiku #61062, by ash
November 22, 2018 1:47 am ET

Define limerick.
Other than being dirty.
Rhythm, rhyme, so on.
Haiku #61061, by Edward Lear's left testicle.
November 21, 2018 8:05 pm ET

Give you sedatives
Dunk you in a vat of nog
Fuck your brains right out
Haiku #61060, by Anonymous Poet
November 21, 2018 6:59 pm ET

That ain't a limerick
You better lay off the sauce
Poet, Stay Sober!!
Haiku #61059, by Anonymous Poet
November 21, 2018 6:58 pm ET

Egg nog with rum sucks.
Drink half a gallon per day.
You must drink it straight.

Spend New Year's alone.
No one likes to fuck fatties.
Not even when drunk.
Haiku #61058, by df
November 21, 2018 6:56 pm ET

This bad haiku's a limerick.
When you read it you will be sick.
You'll vomit a bucket
of puke and shout "fuck it",
Cunt maggots and dog feces lick.
Haiku #61057, by Vaginal Flatus Discharge Beverage Beaver Hemorhage of Bloody Mary
November 21, 2018 6:51 pm ET

Santa brings presents
But why dont God and Jesus?
Cheap Motherfuckers
Haiku #61056, by Person who wants lots of presents
November 21, 2018 6:46 pm ET

I've not drank egg nog,
disappointing heart surgeons,
for about four years.
Haiku #61055, by df
November 21, 2018 5:51 pm ET

Spiked Santa's egg nog
latte with Viagra pills.
Shopping mall scandal.
Haiku #61054, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 21, 2018 5:48 pm ET

I rode a funt-cart.
It wouldn't go very fast.
It was at Wal-Mart.

Oh wait, no, I'm wrong.
It was one of those "Rascals".
The seat smelled funny.
Haiku #61053, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
November 21, 2018 7:37 am ET

Quantum particles
swerve inappropriately
whilst navigating.
Haiku #61052, by the way of the scoundrel
November 21, 2018 5:39 am ET