Work at a start-up
It doesn't pay very well
Thanks for the pencils

I never sleep well
My back calls me a cheapskate
I must buy a bed

I was bored before
But poem about Buttercup
Is so crap I cry

When I make dinner
I realize I need more food
Hot Pockets are fine.

Five syllables here
Seven syllables go here
I am not too creative

I sat in front of
the biggest Indian tool
on the plane last night

phunkadelica
sharon, ben, joe, dean and paul
like to eat hot dogs

Lots of beer last night
The ugly girls were models
Monday morning. Don't call.

Hell is horrible
The Dark One tortures your soul
With awful Haiku.

Welcome Gentlemen
All Your Base Are Belong To
Us What You Say Cats?

come read silly pith
submissions are filtered
leave your brains at home

Princess Buttercup!
what a relief! Give I ah-
re-PET-TIT-tive sigh~

when the spring comes rain
and my knee hurts so badly
amputation now.

Kevin is super
Gay really really dumb
He does acid, dumb

School really blows ass
I don't like going to school
My school really sucks

School really blows ass
I don't like going to school
My school really sucks

I have my own puss
now that I am big and stong
my puss grows with me

The Partisan League
Coveting your cheese supplies.
Ware Xarabydun!

Elephant dancer,
I can so smell you from here.
Fester away, Dad!

Lumbering for hell
Foot locked in moral bear trap.
Rice gets in your eyes.

speaking to teacher
I discovered that I had
forgotten my leg

Monday morning poo
flushing weekend's decadence
a ton of red meat

my dream was quite good
I ate bacon and radish
followed by some cake

I am so docile
I am so fucking docile
I kick docile ass

Bad Haiku just stinks
horrible, disgusting, bad
and i adore it

Get on up Get on
up Ah Like a sex machine
Ah Get on up Ow!

Get up on it
Get up on it like this
Get up on it

Hockey player bit
my earlobe but then a
game broke out - beer ad

still up on this sheet.
potential kills greedy time
paper? more sheet? hmmm.

go wash your mouth out
with something stronger than soap.
maybe arsenic

Possible they stood
near you? You shit-eating git.
Can't you smell yourself?

Foreign students, phew!
What makes them smell? Do they bathe?
Do they know of soap?

Mother Theresa
Fawning over the wretched
Me, Christian? No thanks.

Look, a corn "floater"
Don't remember eating that
mmm... *smack* Yes, I do!

Well, har-dee-har-har
I got me a three-legg'd goat
Chew on this, Billy.

Do let's bend over!
Take it like good receivers
We expand and tear.

I told you, woman
Don't mix carrots with jell-o
That shit is nasty.

sleep like an angel
dream like a dirty sinner
wash your sheets, that's gross.

Dripping white bird shit
Falls _into_ a man on bench
Snoring, mouth open

my stupidity
oh no what got into me
that tumidity !

"tumnescence" doesn't
have an "n" in it. but we
all fuck up sometimes

a rounded swelling
oh so beautiful like a
partial moon at night

swelling in the ranks
a sort of e-tumnescence
stimulating jerks

evil sluts of night
how you tease would-be watchers.
a trick? prob'ly not.

too bad you missed when
ten bucks each; me and cris kissed
and yeah, there was tongue

buttsex in my ear
do it do it do it oh
messy isn't it

take a long sweet draught
cold sustinence from a can
only the lucky

the erection of my
soul leads to the butt fucking
of the universe

can't go to sleep now, the queen of the radio can't pry the conk from her ear. swishhhhhhhshhshshshhhhh... er um, ,,
the ocean won't leave the shore.

can't go to sleep now, the queen of the radio can't pry the conk from her ear. swishhhhhhhshhshshshhhhh... er um, ,,
the ocean won't leave the shore.