Give me more info.
Write a creative by-line.
Then I'll know it's you!
by Senryu Seppuku of Nagashima
If you're bored with porn.
Why not try a prostitute?
What is there to lose?
Well, yeah, there's money.
And you could get HIV.
It beats suicide.
Go on, blow some cash.
Go crazy, live a little.
You might just like her.
Read her your poems.
Show her bad haiku dot com.
Go on, we're waiting.
by
So . . . that circle jerk;
what happened to it, poets;
Did your muses leave?
by the time you realize you are full of shit, it is too late
What's the worse part about safe sex?
Stopping to click the mouse.
...And a sticky keyboard if you're not careful.
by
Do not waste your life.
Drive your car into a crowd.
Claim you were possessed.
Seek resolution
on Oprah or some talk show.
You will be famous.
by
That craving for porn;
say you don't ever get it
and I say you lie.
by performing amateur gynecology, the love of porn is not diminished
The Sabaeans or Sabeans (Arabic: اَلـسَّـبَـئِـيُّـون‎, as-Saba
by Wikipedia, which is full of conjecture
i could off myself
in real life, no more porn or
haiku from me, so
i think ill stick around even though i feel
bad today ive menial work to do
by vhs of fuck it
The Queen of Sheba
must have had a clitoris.
Or was she Muslim?
by the dry riverbeds of Southern Yemen
You ever had hope?
I mean... how naive are you?
All species die; ours too.
Extinction is good.
It is all God's perfect plan.
blah blah blah blah blah.
by
Did Allah tell you
To sew their vaginas shut?
Hell rises with you.
by informing yourself of the truth, you become no wiser
Nomadic faces:
Somali girls with no clits
infibulated
by sewing it shut, the risk of later health concerns increases
United States of
brainwashed by MSN News,
Go to hell forthwith.
by ignoring His law, nations come under the wrath of Almighty God
There are some nations
that seem truly to be cursed.
Can you name any?
by titling the documentary "A Cursed Land", France 24 made me think of this sad reality.
South Sudan at war:
Cattle rustling, burning huts
Flies on corpses. God.
by watching documentaries, one loses the hope of progress for mankind
I'll start this one off.
Online poets' circle jerk.
SK can finish.
Let's get those pants down.
We got your back, vhs.
We believe in you.
And... stroke 1, 2, 3.
stroke 1, 2, 3; 1, 2, 3.
Uh, oh. That was fast.
How embarrassing.
Em bare ass ing... or something.
Now where's the Kleenex.
by df
Just go masturbate.
You'll feel better afterwards.
Beats writing haiku.
by df
Inherit the wind
A fortune of flatulance
Methane Millionaire
Write bestselling book
Sign autographs with fart stains!
Back End Billionaire
by Starkitten of On the run
i wish i were in
the frame of mind to actually
be funny right now
by vhs
The sex was hot but
Always laying on the couch
Scratching his ink sack
by On the one hand it was good but on the other 7.....
Y'know, I can't name
a single modern poet.
Quite comical, yes?
by
Oh fucking hell no.
Tell me we're not back to this.
Cephalopod porn.
But considering
that haiku are Japanese,
I guess it makes sense.
by
Good night vhs
Good night John Boy Walton's mole
Good night James Caan's face
by Nettikrats
Good old Abel got
A pretty sweet deal - at rest
Under the water
Something something cryptosporidium
by Adam Ben Adam of nightly burnt offerings
They gave Ecstasy
To octopi and didn't
Even invite me
by Sparklepony, MD
i'm tired, i want to
write more haiku but I am
tired tonight from chats
by vhs of i wanted better results!
Be on the Lookout!
Starkitten has escaped cage!
Huge Haiku Reward!
by Anonymous Poet
Caress of night wind
A bitchslap to the senses
Kinky Excursion
by Starkitten of Kinky Pacific Northwest
James and I will help
Hop in. We're driving to town
For notebook paper
by Starkitten Good Samaritan
The carp-pool's surface
moved by murmurs of night wind...
Hey -- any beer left?
by the empty case of Kirin Asahi
Found a better way
To keep him hobbled in bed
Just sat on his face
by Starkitten of The end of all Misery and Suffering
Meow James meow Caan meow
Meow Starkitten meow love him
Meow James meow Caan meow
by Meow Starkitten meow
My my, such rancor...
Such peeved ventings of Haiku:
Embittered poets.
by Anonymous Poet
Tex-Mex, Chipotle
Diarrhetic poetry
All Trump's fault; who knew?
by the verse you write, I know you're a fan of our Triumphant President
So I often hear jokes about Taco Bell, Chipoltle and other Tex-Mex food giving people runs... I mean, maybe the bean fiber makes it all come out better, but I wouldn't call that diarrhea, would you? I mean, drinking 3rd world water can give you serious problems, but that's not what we're talking about. I think maybe these white bread and hamburger hillbilly motherfuckers need a serious bout of the runs to clean out their grease trap guts anyway. Fucking Trump supporters. But Trump doesn't need a supporter b/c his penis is too small. Har har har.
by
I find enjambment
to be quite offensive and
inappropriate.
But to that I say,
"Enjamb your tongue up me arse!"
And your little dog...
too.
by
what about that nazi
on rowan and matins laugh
in...very inter-
esting, but SCHTOOPID!
by vhs of by the way haiku has its purpose
Chipotle epics,
doing those girls doggy-style;
bold. But not Haiku!
by the way, this form of poetry is very strict. And stupid.
Blue waffle syrup.
Aunt Jemima free clinic.
I blame Uncle Ben.
He shouldn't have seen
Mrs. Butterworth side chick.
Fucking blue waffles.
by
The blossom fell down,
slowly spinning like a dance,
never to be fruit.
by
Danny's small penis
was no match for Jennifer's
gaping vagina.
by
Comparing her vagina to an over-stuffed Chipoltle burrito, Alex had the car door slammed in his face as his now ex-girlfriend peeled out and left him stranded in the hood. He made some new friends and took them over to his side of town to treat them to some Chipoltle, hand crafted beer, and white girls. The barista at the Insomnia all night coffee shop gave them all extra good blowjobs before they returned to the hood and Alex called up his girlfriend and made up with her, saying that his comparison was meant as a compliment because he likes eating Chipoltle burritos and he really wanted his car back. When she met him he bitch-smacked her and did her doggie style half the night and screwed her like a black man would. She loved it.
It had been a good day.
by
Let's have a party.
Paul Reubens for president!
A Playhouse Party.
By "party" I mean
a political party.
Chairy for VP.
by
This is no haiku.
But then what did you expect,
a huge vagina?!
by
Ex sister in law
Had ass skin grafted to face
I Called her Assface
by Makes sense
Sir David Schwimmer
Spanking the monkey on Friends
Thanks a lot, Marcel..
by Starkitten and Peter Gabriel of We like monkeying around
Silly Starkitten
Don't you ever grow tired
Of biology?
by the banks of the Swanee banking cartel
basically i want
to clone myself and spank the rear
ends of each gen z
sjw and burn
their syllubuses and force them
into boot camp for three
months...I am frustrated
thanks a fucking bunch Marcuse
by vhs
Class Action Lawsuit
Cunt Muffler faulty product
Slippery when wet
by Starkitten & Starkitten Attorneys at Law
Silence your horrible vagina!
I can hear it from the other
side of the world!
by df of My new job is a sales rep for Cunt Muffler LTD.