BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
23 Years
342 Days
68427 Haikus
i wonder if this
place will still be postable
after the 31st?
Haiku #58267, by vhs of if not goodbye old friend
March 30, 2018 12:09 pm ET

they wanted me to
make a decision on some
thing i could care less

about one hundred per-
cent as if organizing toothpicks
was a life and death thing
Haiku #58266, by vhs
March 30, 2018 11:59 am ET

existential end
all is nothing, i want to
boing you like an an
Haiku #58265, by vhs of nine inch that taylor swifts first band...dur!
March 30, 2018 11:10 am ET

i can hear you floyd
any anonymity
is wires in my brain
Haiku #58264, by ash
March 30, 2018 6:23 am ET

Set the controls for
the heart of the sun, the heart
of the sun, the heart...
Haiku #58263, by Anonymous Poet of
March 30, 2018 3:15 am ET

how long is a chinaman
and he called me last night
very funny American joke
Haiku #58262, by vhs
March 30, 2018 12:20 am ET

It's beyond "website".
I'm a bi-tempered guy with
a short sex organ.
Haiku #58261, by of
March 29, 2018 11:57 pm ET

Make your penis huge.
Magical porn star cock pills.
Viagra dot cum.
Haiku #58260, by Ron Jeremy's pet crab lice
March 29, 2018 11:51 pm ET

its just a website...
im a bisexual guy
with a short temper

irish german and
ill miss this place, or you know
april fools, its still here
Haiku #58259, by vhs
March 29, 2018 11:42 pm ET

I am bored with this
So I will go away now

That sounds so sexy
But words can deceive us all
Into foolishness

So have at me chief
Or chef? Let the insults fly
Plunger in my ass?

So I go away
Unlike you, i do mean it.
One, two, three, four, five
Haiku #58258, by Mandingo Ebola
March 29, 2018 5:13 pm ET

Me; cute hippie chicks
DF; Asian prostitutes
VHS; his hand
Haiku #58257, by Who are we dating tonight?
March 29, 2018 1:49 pm ET

Thank you VHS
You are so dang amusing
Hilarious hate

Life didn't turn out right
So you lash out in anger
Whenever provoked

Just like Pavlov's dog.
If his dog was a racist
And homophobic.

All I did to you
Was to hold up a mirror...
Didn't like what you saw...
Haiku #58256, by Mandingo Ebola
March 29, 2018 1:46 pm ET

something woke up last
night in me that all the crap
just fell
Haiku #58255, by vhs
March 29, 2018 10:05 am ET

feelings are easily hurt
someone said dont pay attention
to him on the way out

of work tonight.
i feel like not showing up tomorrow
to let those people do without me
Haiku #58254, by Anonymous Poet
March 28, 2018 11:18 pm ET

Nothing precedeth
mine bitter weltanschauung
finally: my balls
Haiku #58253, by Lush
March 28, 2018 10:46 pm ET

Opening Day Tribute:

the crack of the bat?
behold the crack of my ass
I hate baseball games
Haiku #58252, by Lush
March 28, 2018 10:34 pm ET

You boys got so mean
Taking away all the fun.
Makes goodbye easy.
Haiku #58251, by Adorable Kittens
March 28, 2018 3:07 pm ET

what's sad about the
end of old things that to me
seems like it did not

have to happen to
begin with but the right folks
lost their interest

did not care, followed
a trend, or ended a good
friendship due to a

stupid need to be right
Haiku #58250, by vhs
March 28, 2018 1:37 pm ET

i will wait and see
if the owner of this old
site puts a new thing

up, till that time, farewell
Haiku #58249, by vhs
March 27, 2018 2:19 pm ET

well since you are a
math geek old friend, tell me of
grahams number would you?
Haiku #58248, by vhs
March 27, 2018 11:06 am ET

me being an asshole
had a real purpose sometimes
i find more conservative

people feel they can
be honest when theres the
sort of doublethink

that orwell warned of
in 1984...and it is evil
but mushroom soup if

done right, damn good now
Haiku #58247, by vhs
March 27, 2018 10:59 am ET

i value human life
so when i hear about that i
think jordan petersens

segments about how
much evil faith the columbine
murderers had...i

think weve too many
snowflakes and theyre all vulnerable
to lies and evil

ofcourse i look at hentai!
and swear like a lunatic
save the fucking world df

or you will answer to me for eternity
Haiku #58246, by the force of chaos
March 26, 2018 10:24 pm ET

i dont care, your own
stuff is old hat to me df
i dont want a cult

i was on this site
with hypnosis fetishists
and now im too mad

to think of sex i
am aiming for letting is
worth it, all is suffering

fuck it, forgive them
Haiku #58245, by vhs of i hate my rotten moments, i miss my cheap beer and chew
March 26, 2018 10:21 pm ET

I never could figure out the whole Jim Jones Kool-Aid thing... I mean, cyanide, great and all... but why kill all your follower and then yourself??? He should have killed them and kept all their money and property and gotten rich, claiming insanity when brought to trial. He could then have gone on talk shows and inspired other people to buy Nikes and catch the next space ship via way of KCN almond flavored Kook-Aid. Yummy!
He could have been a hero, just like crazy old Charlie, but no...
I need my own cult. Bring me offerings of figs and young prostitutes and various mind altering substances! Bring them now!

Ergot scrotal warts
transport me to other planes.
Come, follow me now!
Haiku #58244, by df is sick of normality!
March 26, 2018 9:25 pm ET

Perhaps the Kool-Aid
is the normal thing to do.
Who are we to judge?

The older I get
the more pointless it all seems.
I've no hope at all.

The world will soon die.
In one or a billion years.
Drink up while you can.

Fine dining and wine.
Or heroin and Kool-Aid.
It doesn't matter.

Whichever you choose,
destroy yourself or the world,
God will be laughing.
Haiku #58243, by Darth Figpucker of
March 26, 2018 9:15 pm ET

people set up their
cults and call it normal and
then drink the cool aid
Haiku #58242, by vhs
March 26, 2018 2:46 pm ET

meh heh heh heh heh
someone tells me the program
always wins, gosh darn

isolated inter
net meme belief systems
Haiku #58241, by vhs
March 26, 2018 2:40 pm ET

I have to go write
a chemistry lab report
for a spoiled kid.
Haiku #58240, by
March 26, 2018 2:26 pm ET

No no no.... I'm a math whore.
I could never work in a kitchen.
Haiku #58239, by
March 26, 2018 2:24 pm ET

Here's a fun one for you: Pick up a novel written 100 years ago, 80 years, 60... and so on until a present day novel.
That should depress you enough to make you go on a homicidal rampage.
Haiku #58238, by df
March 26, 2018 2:23 pm ET

dude, i work in a
kitchen. i love it. I like
the men and women

i work with. A good
bunch they are you see, maybe
you're crazy enough

to work there as well
Haiku #58237, by vhs
March 26, 2018 2:21 pm ET

Sports would not bore me
if only more people died.
Typhoon wind surfing.

Explosive footballs.
Tornado parachuting.
Grizzly bear jousting.

And the ever popular shouting
"get your ass back in the kitchen"
at a feminist march.
Haiku #58236, by Darth Figpucker of
March 26, 2018 2:16 pm ET

well the arts did so
suffer in these digital
times or im just old...
Haiku #58235, by vhs of GORDONS CALLE
March 26, 2018 1:15 pm ET

donald trump is a
caricature already, you cant
get more cartoonish
Haiku #58234, by vhs
March 26, 2018 12:17 pm ET

i had a belief
that one speaks their mind if
they can get away

with it, even with
faith, politics, sex, and sports
sports talk scares me much
Haiku #58233, by vhs hole
March 26, 2018 12:08 pm ET

rotten artistic
temper doesn't really sit
well with me either :X
Haiku #58232, by vhs
March 26, 2018 10:42 am ET

well the problem with
you is i like you so i
think god had a plan

for this endless round
of haiku poems and so
on, keep in touch then
Haiku #58231, by vhs
March 26, 2018 2:17 am ET

Hate isn't so bad.
And, like a bisexual,
it can go both ways.

Which hate is stronger.
It will kill us in the end.
Divided we fall.

I, for one, am glad.
Mankind deserves no better.
Look at what we've done.
Haiku #58230, by df
March 26, 2018 2:08 am ET

its a theory, the
evil liberal media hate
machine trashed m and m

he fought back
48 laws of power
this place dies it sucks

life goes on
Haiku #58229, by vhs
March 26, 2018 12:28 am ET

i guess i want to
end this little show with a
bang, egg me on

Haiku #58228, by vhs
March 26, 2018 12:17 am ET

id rather be a nut
and speak my mind than be a dickless
asshole with a three

inch penis with secret
desires of wearing a chastity
cage, my passive

aggresive little submissive closeted
bisexual jock wannabe
Haiku #58227, by vhs
March 26, 2018 12:11 am ET

i feel really good
saying idish things, feel 'sorry'
superego shills
Haiku #58226, by freuds big cigar of smoke me, im a fattie
March 26, 2018 12:04 am ET

then theres the old 'meds'
bullshit, go fuck yourself whilst
i stick a prozac suppository

up your liberal
ass so you can take it from
the plunger handle better
Haiku #58225, by vhs of i take it our critical buddy got bored smashing out windows for antifa creeps
March 25, 2018 11:59 pm ET

meh, theres all this crap
about keeping it 'cool'...well
fuck it, i keep it real

id rather kill myself
than conform to someones sense
of who im supposed

to be
Haiku #58224, by vhs
March 25, 2018 11:57 pm ET

Donald Trump's toupee.
A Tribble on Viagra.
It humps his bald head.
Haiku #58223, by Darth Figpucker of A brothel in Angeles City, Philippines
March 25, 2018 8:18 pm ET

You seem quite angry
I'm embarrassed for you dude
You can do better
Haiku #58222, by Might be time to get back on your meds
March 25, 2018 5:49 pm ET

Haiku #58221, by Mandingo Ebola
March 25, 2018 2:39 pm ET

like a roaring lion
perhaps im satanic and evil
i know my time is

short, then tears here
game over, move on, find
another vent place
Haiku #58220, by vhs
March 25, 2018 12:40 pm ET

i believe we live
in the Crisis, so it will take
tough measures be

fore Uncle Moonbeam
takes the tin foil off his head
and watches fox nudes...

i mean news
Haiku #58219, by vhs
March 25, 2018 12:34 pm ET

or if you god damned
liberal scum get your head out of
the nazi lite playbook

youve been referencing
listen to dave rubin and his
guests, id rather save

the world than see
it ruined by extremists
Haiku #58218, by vhs
March 25, 2018 12:30 pm ET