I had a dream I was talking to a dog
His English wasn't very good
I was just impressed he understood
by dvd
How much should one read?
Almost seems like a lost art.
Most prefer pictures.
by Adorable Kittens
I have a big poop
His name is Shittin
I'll never trust him as a sandwich
by Atlas Pooped
I have a big snake
His name is Satan
I'll never trust him as a necklace
by Adam Ben Adam
If there are only physical phenomena
There is no mind, in which case
This isn't happening
by Drowsy Philosopher
potus sounds
like a marvel villian name likr
modoc or...zorgo
baron mordo, doctor doom
by vhs
Jesus died?!
by Confused Muslim
Circular logic is circular
Jesus didn't die for sin
Circular logic is circular
by Tiny Circles
If not for Jesus,
there would never be a Grinch,
to steal Christmas!
If you never sin,
then Jesus was crucified
for nothing but gifts.
And I guess for kicks.
by Anonymous Poet
we wouls miss out though
on mister grinch who i think
should be year around...
if we went back too far
by Anonymous Poet
Christmases of yore.
1950s thereabouts.
Set the time machine.
by Anonymous Poet
Circling the drain.
Bacon blue cheese hamburgers
and eggnog milk shakes.
by Anonymous Poet
I keep trying to get a plane ticket
To the nation of Robonia
But they tell me it isn't real
by dvd of I apparently need a new travel agency
given youve worked with
me irl are you sure i might not
be a sweet transvestite from
planet Transylvania? no
we also worked with real Trans
sylvanians
by JWA/vhs
murphys law sez we
gonna make it hard for youse
to touch base like, timely
by jwa/vhs
I've met alot of people like that
The (mostly) dead guy I found in a
Gas station restroom - overdose
The clerk seemed annoyed at me when I brought it to their attention that there
Was an unresponsive man in there
The Colombian man who believed a shape shifting transsexual Mexican assassin was trying to murder him
He wanted me to buy him an assault rifle... Uncomfortable
Then there is the man that flew illegal bombing missions during the Vietnam conflict, I think it was in Cambodia, to clear highways for China (domino theory lol) he also thought it would be wise to "kill all Muslims" you know as a Precaution... He told me that
War is good for the country
I don't disagree with the statement
I disagree with the assessment of
The meaning of the word "good"
And "country" because I think by
"Good" he meant profitable
And by "country" he meant extrememly Wealthy white people
by dvd
common thing that is
those make up the events that
haunt us folks in life
love em though enjoy
weird stuff....
by vhs
I remember when I was a child
Someone knocked on the door
I answered it and there was
An unremarkable man standing There who asked me where my
Father was - He wasn't home
After the man left my mom
Came downstairs and was Extremely upset that I had Opened the door for
A stranger, I asked her how to
Tell the difference between
A bad man and a good man
I figured they must wear
Different color clothes
*Kid Logic*
We got a security system after That and I never found out who The man was or why he wanted
To talk to my dad - it's funny how A small event like that
Sticks with me 20 years later
I think it must be the lack of Resolution
That makes someone otherwise
Unremarkable
Something that I still
Remember
by dvd of the mid-1990's
doncha know homey
pop goes the weasel cuz the
weasel goes pop... right...
by JWA(vhs)
Pop goes the Weasel
Will be the last song ever
Heard by human ears
by Anonymous Poet
creative output
rendered for your consumption
the best I can do
by Robot painter
What song will the last
human listen to as he
or she lays dying.
by Anonymous Poet
Pachyderms cannot
be blamed for holding grudges;
they're nearly extinct.
by df
People bitch about GMOs
The solution is a drought and
10,000 chain smoking crows
by Crow #1
During the time of the black death
Skeletal men in black robes were seen
This is where the image of the Grim
Reaper comes from - but they did not
Have sickles, they waved staffs as
They went through rye fields, spreading
A black fog throughout... An explosion
Of ergotism and famine was the result
by dvd
how do you turn a
web comic female person
into literature???
by vhs
existential deaths
died when irony fell in
9/11, we thought
ironically
by Anonymous Poet
loaded with grudges
the elephant in the room
can never forgive
by ash
my best intentions
can never be good enough
misinterpreted
by ash
my failed compliments
are the red rags to the bull
who sees monochrome
by ash
hmm german delis
would never be the same once
lsd reubens
hit the market
by vhs
LSD comes from
rye wheat fungus but I can't
trip on a Reuben.
Weaponized airborne
ergot infections would make
earth a better place.
Mustard gas passe.
Passed the gassy Grey Poupon.
Dijon and Kraut farts.
Psychadelic lunch
corned beef, swiss, kraut, on rye
with yellow cap shrooms.
by Anonymous Poet
Animals are nice
Sometimes they might have some lice
You can still eat them
by Mandingo Ebola of The land where cats rule
Aww, vhs remember
Things could also be worse
At least you're not DF
by Atlas Pooped
not much in the mood
today, all the things I'm chasing
are just mirages...
by vhs
Some farmers down south
Pay good money to hunters
Who kill wild hogs
by dvd of profiting from disaster can be kosher
Six million wild hogs
Destroying America
Eat lots of bacon
by Mandingo Ebola of Offering solutions in times of crisis
Shit just got real here
Anonymous cowards suck
Even I know that
by Mandingo Ebola
depends on what you
smoke, with what and how often
you blow the smoke out
by vhs
yum yum yum you know
how much salt is in old spam
i wont eat the stuff
by vhs
Hooray spam is back
Like rotten maggots feasting
On internet rot
by Concerned American
well censorship of
baby boomers who do not
value human life
great stuff ;)
by vhs of damn zombies
The butane hash oil I am so fond of
Is, by mass, the same price
As electronics grade gold... I'm poor
But withdrawal from nicotine and
Caffeine make cannabis withdrawal
Laughably easy
My endocannabinoid system will
Fully recover and so will my wallet
by dvd
But if you love it,
if you love your addiction,
is it all that bad?
Science, music, athletics, cannibalism...
all great stuff!
by Anonymous Poet
addiction is a
downer, food, internet, games
even vanilla things
the ordinary drag of life
by vhs
ill try to get some
folks posting if i can but
christmas is coming
by vhs
Cannabis - panic attacks every time
The weird thing is that truly
I enjoy that so fucking much
by dvd of walking a fine line between dependence and addiction
vhs got a galaxy tablet
this is not fake news
preparing for apocalypse
by dvd of studying the exotic element: "Uuu" aka Devonium
that's good my dear sir
that's pretty damn good nice to
see you Ghost...it's me!
by vhs
I must stay silent
Lest they reveal my own guise
I must stay quiet
by Ghsostbusters2