the irony my
deeply missed friend is what is
next on the menu?

P.S. Google Kellyanne Conway and Beavis for a good laugh.

Opioids are not the problem.
War is not the problem.
Who is president is not the problem.
Even environmental destruction is not the problem.
The problem is overpopulation.
All else is symptomatic.

The only solution is a "superbug".
I personally like the idea of an airborne
antibiotic resistant gonorrhea.

I tried to make such a bug by
recreational activities,
but all I got was singing balls.

They sing "Poker Face".
I wouldn't mind Jethro Tull
Zeppelin or Pink Floyd.

But what do I get?
Balls that sing Lady Gaga.
Karaoke balls.

Also whoever had the idea
To put Kellyanne Conway
In charge of the nation's opioid crisis
Should be fired or at the very least
Be sent to his room without supper
Solution to the opioid crisis:
Legalize ibogaine and have free clinics
Or nothing will change whatsoever

Yes there are people that believe
That the world is flat...
And yet they are allowed
To fucking build rockets
I mean... I'm no more likely to vote
Darth Figpucker for President
Because I still have some love
For humanity, but that is tested daily

I've proudly never
shizzled anyone's nizzle,
whatever that is.

I wish I could sleep.
My testicles won't let me.
They keep on singing.

Snickerdoodle pie
a la mode caramel drizzle
shizzle my nizzle.

I think obviously that was done in sick humor only. Perverts don't make perverted jokes about being perverts. Or do they?
"Sitting on a park bench, eying little girls with bad intent."
And I wouldn't call Ian Anderson a perv for such lyrics, but oh well.

Someone's been spending
Way too much time at the
Ping Pong Pizza Place

Times are so creepy
And you are adding to it
I mean wow, really?

Smarties candy best
The little boys will attest
Reach in my pocket

Chocolate goat milk
super-duper strong coffee
buzz-buzz masterbait

master bait
novice trap
newbie boobie
silicon valley

Have you ever tried
all organic Cheesy Poofs?
That is a real thing!

the man had the roost
all to hisself, it ain't much
fun like it is though...

sometimes you just say
ah fuggetaboutit and
let go, there it is

expecting much from
people, alas people do
dissapoint people

slow down and observe
the moment and the whole zen
thing soon makes some sense

rush rush rush, hurry
hurry hurry, get things done
then next day you die

drug are bad mmkay?
you know south park, midwest, cut
outs, cartman, now stay

away from my cheesy poofs

You know how helium makes your voice sound like the chipmunks, well nitrous makes your voice slightly deep like Satan has taken over your body... another fun reason to try it.

I think I have it!
I'll start doing whip-cream gas.
Nitrous oxide laugh.

Just say N2O.
Like being at the dentist,
No drilling needed.

But I could get killed.
Police kill drug users here.
So what should I do?

I need some hard drugs.
My wife said she would leave me
if I start with drugs.

Not a bad idea!
But what will I serve for drinks?
Pina Colada?

Remove seat from bike
Replace with it with a bar stool
Hipster super cool

I'll ride my bike all
day long to the point of
exhaustion or death.

But I hate that feeling of the pointy bike seat feeling like its going up your ass like you've fallen drunkenly asleep at a frat party and some drunk "Eata Pumpkin Pie" has had too much X and discovered that he has homosexual tendencies after his "girlfriend" went home with some football player and can you blame her. Fucking bike seats.

Erectify Cheer.
Bono boner bonbon hump.
Help me, Lord Satan!

In the depths of mind,
one cannot truly see life
from faults of the past

once vibrant storefronts
give way to for sale or rent
signs and tattered paint

"The sphinx's sphincter
made quite an uncommon toot,"
said Tutankhamun.

Penile implant.
Nile crocodile Lyle.
Ate Neffer-titty.

It is not normal.
Uncommon Tutankhamun.
He smoked too much hash.

people make choices
and we may not agree but
we will miss y'all

hmm i understand
words better if you don't mind
guys will be guys though

The meaning of life
One's life can have a meaning
I don't know how to quantify that

The meaning of life
Is it a variable
In the equation ?

if it were a bad
haiku on thanksgiving it
would be a turkey

so stuff it as you will
and cover it with gravy

happy thanksgiving
forty two is the answer
what is the question?

Happy Thanksgiving.
Eat lots of sweet potato,
turkey and gravy.

difference is that
I'd end up marrying one
of the green girls there

don't tell De, he thinks
if the girl is green she gone
past experation

None of the theorems contain an equality. In language they call that an incomplete sentence.
It is believed that as the dimensionality of the Madelung constant is increased that it diverges or approaches infinity. No one has proved this, to my knowledge. It's not as sexy as twin primes or Reimann or why did the chicken cross an arbitrary plane of existence and uniqueness when it could have just as easily stayed home in the roost keeping its eggs warm.
Chickens should be called roosters -- they stay in the roost. Roosters should be called COCKS.
Been a while since I've seen a good cock fight. Sabong. NYSE old days.
Drunk enough, I just might try balot eggs afterwards. Assuming I still have 50 pesos left.

If vhs was captain of the Enterprise
Instead of James T Kirk
I don't think much would change
Scotty would be as stressed as ever
But most importantly
I know vhs would be seeking out alien Females with the same zeal
All he needs is warp drive capability

"J-ROD'S NUMBER" THEOREM:
(# of herps) / (# of derps) + (# of cigarettes smoked per hour) - (# of tins of bacon flavored chewing tobacco consumed) ^ (angular momentum of chicken tender upon consumption)

"VHS' NUMBER" THEOREM:
(# of burgers) / (# of Sue B impersonations per minute) + (# of degrees cap is askew) - (liberal to conservative ratio) ^ (# of kittens currently in lap)

the old folks try to
set limits on the younger
knowing too well their

time is coming

Marilyn Manson?
I didn't know she was ill.
Tainted Love loved taint.

mugabe, manson
keep it in the family
is their common theme

The witches are false.
They refuse to eat children.
Oh, but they'll drink beer!

Rather than the death penalty, murderers should be kept on public display, much like at a zoo, where we could pay to speak to them and be entertained. The money made would easily pay for the prison as well as victim compensations. Sadly, we live in a "civilized" society, not a sane one.

So Manson's near death.
Strangely I do not feel sad.
He brought much laughter.

I'd like some absinthe.
The real McCoy with wormwood.
For breakfast and lunch.