Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 56 Days and 78008 Haiku later...
oh is that right? well...
live with it, deal with it, fuck
it, get on with life
Haiku # 55378 November 9, 2016 12:15 pm ET
by vhs
smug redneck faces
our country is a huge joke
mass suicide. please.
Haiku # 55377 November 9, 2016 9:51 am ET
by Rick Snyder Has IBS
Change "In God We Trust"
to "Grab 'Em By The Pussy".
Write this on your cash.
Haiku # 55376 November 9, 2016 3:46 am ET
by df
I am saddened.
Racism triumphs again.
Turn on the ovens.

Invest in methane.
Or perhaps cyanide gas.
You'll make a fortune.

On the other hand.
"Just grab 'em by the pussy."
I think I like it.
Haiku # 55375 November 9, 2016 3:44 am ET
by df
President Donald
This is going to cost us
Can not believe it
Haiku # 55374 November 9, 2016 1:58 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
D
Haiku # 55366 November 8, 2016 8:43 pm ET
by df
Getting stoned on farts.
A fascinating concept.
I bet it would work.

You must collect them.
Like in a party balloon.
Huff them like nitrous.
Haiku # 55352 November 8, 2016 8:37 pm ET
by df
Poop is worse than spam.
I could post animal porn.
Whatever it takes.

But still no progress.
The spam goes undeleted.
I'll go sniff my farts.
Haiku # 55351 November 8, 2016 8:34 pm ET
by df
eh well you know i
just started wearing glasses
I had them, i was

off and on, you know
it's ok, i'll get used to them
part of, older...
Haiku # 55349 November 8, 2016 5:31 pm ET
by vhs
poop is worse than spam
IMHO, just sayen'
old people are strange
Haiku # 55348 November 8, 2016 1:32 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
i see shit on a
page, i react with some ick
then i put this up
Haiku # 55347 November 7, 2016 9:35 pm ET
by vhs
This is getting old.
I am getting sick of shit.
Next: DONKEY BONER!
Haiku # 55346 November 7, 2016 3:56 pm ET
by df
how to avoide spam?
why not use the new google recaptcha?
very useful!!!
Haiku # 55338 November 7, 2016 12:23 pm ET
by Nima
Rare, lean Angus beef.
Thin cut with Romain, dijon,
and ripe tomatoes.

Served on hearty wheat
that's slightly toasted and
a glass of red wine.

Beaujolais is best.
But what the hell do I know.
Merlot if you must.

Better than bologna or sponge meat and Hell-man's "mayo" with Velveeta on white bread and the amusing prison toilet fermented Kool-Aid... Not that I would know.... ahem.
Haiku # 55333 November 6, 2016 11:29 pm ET
by df
I have to agree.
Sandwiches are indeed nice.
If made properly.
Haiku # 55332 November 6, 2016 11:19 pm ET
by df
Why do anything?
It all adds up to nothing.
Sandwiches are nice
Haiku # 55331 November 6, 2016 10:20 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I think I'll get a goddamn coffee now and surprise them by bringing my own mug and sugar b/c fucking white sugar sucks and I don't like using paper cups w/ plastic lids... so Goddamn wasteful and we should take better care of my planet instead of being such filthy fucking humans. (Pigs are cleaner than humans as far as how much trash they make). If only humans had a shorter life span then they wouldn't be such an environmental problem. We need humans with a shorter shelf live. In praise of tobacco, alcohol, and pharmacy drugs. And those damn pharm drugs still won't cure up my blue zit testicles, Goddamnitall.
What was I talking about?... oh yeah.... coffee....
Haiku # 55329 November 5, 2016 6:27 pm ET
by df
And if so, then what
do you watch on TV while
you are fondling?
Haiku # 55328 November 5, 2016 6:22 pm ET
by df
Seriously though,
do you ever lounge all day
playing with your balls?
Haiku # 55327 November 5, 2016 6:21 pm ET
by df
I have a concern.
Could Skittles make me be gay?
With their gay colors?
Haiku # 55326 November 5, 2016 6:18 pm ET
by df
I'm tired of blue.
I would like rainbow colors.
So I'll try Skittles.
Haiku # 55325 November 5, 2016 6:16 pm ET
by df
Perhaps it could be
interspecies relations
with sea animals.
Haiku # 55324 November 5, 2016 6:13 pm ET
by df
I wonder if it's
'cause I eat a half gallon
of berries each day.
Haiku # 55323 November 5, 2016 6:11 pm ET
by df
Removing blue stains?
I now buy blue underwear.
Smurfette does the same.
Haiku # 55322 November 5, 2016 6:10 pm ET
by df
Testicular zits.
Apparently abnormal.
The pus is bright blue.
Haiku # 55321 November 5, 2016 6:07 pm ET
by df
I'm trying to keep
up but i can only sign on
when I'm not at work

etc etc etc etc, and
when FarmVille is the art the
vanilla wins too

much credence, not that there's
"anything wrong with that" but
chaos vs. order
Haiku # 55320 November 5, 2016 12:19 pm ET
by vhs
It was tan and fibrous from eating lots of veggies like a good little boy and came out rather easily. It had a slight skunk-funk to it from eating pomelo fruit (like a grapefruit, but sweeter).
The skunk smell reminded me of making marijuana cookies. I'll have to do that again some day.
Your welcome.
Haiku # 55310 November 4, 2016 8:14 pm ET
by df
I think I'll poop now.
I'll give you the details.
Be back in flush...
Haiku # 55309 November 4, 2016 8:03 pm ET
by df
Kim Kardashian
would make a good president
for next election.
Haiku # 55308 November 4, 2016 8:00 pm ET
by df
I don't regret it.
Will this condemn me to hell?
Christ, I sure hope so.
Haiku # 55307 November 4, 2016 7:58 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I once threw mud balls
at passing cars when I skipped
kindergarten class.
Haiku # 55306 November 4, 2016 7:53 pm ET
by df
Neither Donald Trump
nor Secretary Clinton
are worth a cat turd.
Haiku # 55305 November 4, 2016 7:50 pm ET
by df
The drug war of Rody Duterte is rather interesting. While in America we might condemn such actions and cruel and inhumane, if you knew the extent of the drug problem over there and its severity, you might come to understand that they really have no choice but to eliminate drugs by whatever means possible.
It isn't pretty, but it's by far the lesser of two evils. It's easy and necessary for liberal politicians in the US to look down on "gestapo" methods to eliminate amphetamine addiction, but it's gotten to the point where there is no other way. Time will show that his methods are quite successful and sometimes civil rights must take a back seat to eliminate poverty and crime.
The fact that he's now "in bed" with the commies is partly the fault of the US attitude towards his methods. The US should mind its own damn business.
Haiku # 55304 November 4, 2016 7:49 pm ET
by df
Pressurized testes.
My penis is not happy.
Please let your wife know.
Haiku # 55303 November 4, 2016 7:41 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Remember in high school, that one teacher with the really big tits?
And when it got cold her nips would stand up.
That was awesome!
Haiku # 55302 November 4, 2016 7:39 pm ET
by df
Have you ever wanted to take a large catapult and launch puppies from it into shark infested waters?
Haiku # 55301 November 4, 2016 7:36 pm ET
by df
That explains a lot.
The way the universe is.
I don't own a gun.
Haiku # 55300 November 4, 2016 7:35 pm ET
by df
It is disturbing.
Each time you kill a kitten,
God will masturbate.
Haiku # 55299 November 4, 2016 7:32 pm ET
by df
I've made up my mind.
I need a dirty young whore.
Like Pink Floyd's Young Lust.
Haiku # 55298 November 4, 2016 7:30 pm ET
by df
Where's the best pizza?
Sao Paulo, Brazil, of course.
It is worth the trip.
Haiku # 55297 November 4, 2016 7:29 pm ET
by df
Italiano Pie.
American Pie spin off.
He fucked a pizza.
Haiku # 55296 November 4, 2016 7:28 pm ET
by df
Fat girl porn is strange.
She went by "Pizza The Slut".
Star Wars porno spoof.
Haiku # 55295 November 4, 2016 7:25 pm ET
by df
Enjoy Pizza Hut.
Pizza the Hut was awesome.
Space Balls was genius.
Haiku # 55294 November 4, 2016 7:23 pm ET
by df
What is really gross:
Collect dandruff and add salt.
Parm cheese substitute.
Haiku # 55293 November 4, 2016 7:23 pm ET
by df
Do NOT order ham
if ever you're in Asia;
it will be sponge "meat".
Haiku # 55292 November 4, 2016 7:23 pm ET
by df
There is too much spam.
It is rather disgusting.
More than the real Spam.

Haiku # 55291 November 4, 2016 7:22 pm ET
by df
I was a clean youth.
In my late years I partied.
And will until death.
Haiku # 55290 November 4, 2016 7:13 pm ET
by df
the system is slow
the abuses of youth creep
up and take the down

path of the wounded
body, staking a claim on
the golden adult
Haiku # 55289 November 4, 2016 11:20 am ET
by vhs
You disappoint me
Go get sleepy mourning buds
Love music davie
Haiku # 55288 November 4, 2016 4:43 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Body decaying.
Collect dead parts dropping off.
Skin, hair, phlegm, penis.
Haiku # 55272 November 3, 2016 4:00 pm ET
by df
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