You can't expect to
weild supreme executive
power just because

Some watery tart
threw a sword at you! Monty
Python is the best.

Shouldn't have waited

Don't do drugs, they can
only bring you bad things like
fun, orgies, and friends.

Stay up late writing
three ten, time for bed i guess
no more britney bash.

Oops, she has done it
again, played with her bra size,
nasty little cheat

I'm of alien
intelligence. At least they
Say. They say too much.

Tis bad to tell a
story by way of haiku?
for me? No. For you?

Pedophile


Given a virgin
to sink his teeth in, he'd bite
and give no reason.

All he wanted was
to be a bit callous, now,
I've just got malice,

bleed like anyone,
like me. My skin, Is just thin,
My skin is still

I'm not all that bad
humor is my favorite thing
I'm shaken, not stirred

There was a time when
I thought that I had a friend
I put down the blade

so flames won't consume
me again. I awakened
to see what they want

all along. Open
eyes, realize all deception was gone. Never was

Not again

That hateful face of
God is just like all the rest
evil face of God

I've seen god's face
hates me with disinterest
Just like all the rest

I mean no offense
mount madonna mama's poems
make me cry. Thank you.

How will your reign end?
Become what you would destroy
buy your damn nikes

Necropheliacs
not so much sexy as dead
and that is just bad.

sluggy slime, you geek
get back to your own damn site
shit in your backyard

Thumper is my friend
I'd do anything for him
Maiming fools, for one

leaving the patio
man goes back to his bedroom
and falls fast asleep

damn computer geeks
they couldn't write no haiku
knock them on their heads

the sky has fallen
all of your precious birds have
died. boo hoo, boo hoo.

Haiku, i can do
as I sit down at the desk
and then fall asleep

Careen down the road
Flash of rabbit under tire
I named him Thumper

They pretend to eat
flesh. Cannibalism which
symbolizes Christ.

guys who drive around,
their big beats shaking cement,
are pretty damn cool.

hot wheel on carpet
poised in darkness patiently
waiting for my foot

six lanes of pure hell
suck in dark and noxious fumes
waiting for the end

toyo bowl heartburn
third world trash clogs the gutter
lone palm in asphalt

waking, the woman
sighs as she looks out the window
patio cocktails

Blocked off parking lot
long walks to rent videos
lazy people keep driving

Purple ducky poo
Barfy super toiletries
confusion? why yes

Hey piss off, sluggy!
Your shit is not welcome here.
You're not that funny.

Hey Haikus are fun
I think I will write one yay
Jason thinks I dumb

Endless channel flipping
The bane of late night viewing
Nothing's on TV

Nature's filled with fools
They must point this out to all
Some use big red font

MY HAIKU SHOULD BE
BIG AND RED AND READ A LOT
IF NOT FUCK YOU ASS

My friends say that I
lash out at society
die bitch six six six

90% chance
to sit and drool. You are wrong
again, weatherman.

I punched his square head
and the moron just sat there.
Computers are dumb

now to my patio
I go for a shot of cheap
gin and some dip chips

storm has subsided
as waters traverse the streets
into the old sewer

What's a "metope"? -
Space between the triglyphs of
a Duric friez.

the drunken master
vendibly airs his website
marketing faux paus

my daughter, she's two
may discern concept of loss
but maybe not death

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imagine there's no
heaven, imagine there's no
people, no rel'gion, too...

found a faster way
to zip into this website
circumnavigate

Burning lips on fire
Only a few peppers, please
Subway

This haiku blows balls
Why the hell am I writing
This stupid-ass thing?

i hate everyone ecept for people that have tits and cunts and give head and r female

Chronic pain. You can
Forget momentarily
Writing bad haiku.