Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 158 Days and 77638 Haiku later...

The deli counter
was out of bologna, so
I just got some ham.
Haiku # 32502, August 19, 2005 6:52 am ET
by TheUnseenUndine
our new phone book has
bail bondsman ad on cover
that'll save me time
Haiku # 32501, August 18, 2005 5:16 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown
Temp tattoos are cool
Just put on skin, add water
Instant body art.
Haiku # 32500, August 18, 2005 11:08 am ET
by TheUnseenUndine
everyone wants me
i wish they'd all just fuck off
and leave me alone
Haiku # 32499, August 18, 2005 9:15 am ET
by ash
burning with desire
but the fireman jilted her
she was so put out
Haiku # 32498, August 18, 2005 9:13 am ET
by ash
Beantown for a week
There are no black people here
'Cept for the students
Haiku # 32497, August 17, 2005 2:43 pm ET
by Maestro of Boston
Father's mother owns
Poultry farms in Ithaca
Grandma has a cock
Haiku # 32496, August 17, 2005 2:39 pm ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
put on a new shirt
today...damn like dashiki
long! Fight the Power
Haiku # 32495, August 17, 2005 12:33 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown
Bare white office walls
Grey phone squawks without stopping
A bird sings - not here
Haiku # 32494, August 17, 2005 10:33 am ET
by geekengineer of Sandy Eggo
On the moon, we are
far too advanced to use your
primitive Earth verse
Haiku # 32493, August 16, 2005 3:16 pm ET
by Betty Lebomb
They like seem to get
bigger every day, yet I'm
the boob for lookin'
Haiku # 32492, August 16, 2005 3:14 pm ET
by onjaysun (look at her eyes!) of frogtown
Dang! These haikus suck!
Who would waste their time with these?
...I think I'll write one.
Haiku # 32491, August 16, 2005 2:34 pm ET
by xris
my quiet little
kennedy forbidden fruit
i can not have you.
Haiku # 32490, August 16, 2005 7:40 am ET
by florintino ariza of 43431
I cannot believe
how much time can be wasted
ticks upon the clock
Haiku # 32489, August 16, 2005 3:02 am ET
by Betty Lebomb
Age is a number
that ticks away the winters
waves on a shoreline
Haiku # 32488, August 16, 2005 3:01 am ET
by Betty Lebomb
I jammed all night long
72 shots bourbon
wiener dogs zero
Haiku # 32487, August 16, 2005 2:59 am ET
by Betty Lebomb
Safely tucked in bed
big bad wolf in the closet
grandma has a cock
Haiku # 32486, August 16, 2005 2:58 am ET
by Betty Lebomb
Oh, the liquor feast
brings upon the morning wood
grandma has a cock
Haiku # 32485, August 16, 2005 2:57 am ET
by Betty Lebomb
Drunken congo line
with stiff bump in the back-side
grandma has a cock
Haiku # 32484, August 16, 2005 2:45 am ET
by Betty Lebomb
Brand new recipe
Lightly sauteed testicles
Mmm, mmm. A sack lunch
Haiku # 32483, August 15, 2005 5:26 pm ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
Mr. and Mrs.
Pez Dispenser, you've gotta
support baby's head
Haiku # 32482, August 15, 2005 3:10 pm ET
by onjaysun R.N. of frogtown
steven malkmus highs
just to get motion from feet.
just cant deliver
Haiku # 32481, August 15, 2005 2:35 pm ET
by florintino ariza of 43431
happy birthday mel
yet we be jammin' long time
grandma has a cock
Haiku # 32480, August 15, 2005 9:37 am ET
by ash
was on the wagon
till the sun set in the west
then I dismounted
Haiku # 32479, August 15, 2005 3:42 am ET
by mellie
whisky soaked raisins
tossed into the birthday cake
my mother made it
Haiku # 32478, August 15, 2005 3:38 am ET
by mellie
fifty six years old
I was so much younger then
the day before that
Haiku # 32477, August 15, 2005 3:36 am ET
by mellie
Such a scorching day
it's not the weather outside
it's a bitch house mate
Haiku # 32476, August 14, 2005 9:55 pm ET
by Betty Lebomb
Huffing gasoline
Plotting array of arsons
Happily, inert
Haiku # 32475, August 14, 2005 5:01 pm ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
Methamphetamine
Either smoked or injected
Clawing at my flesh
Haiku # 32474, August 14, 2005 3:38 pm ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
Silent reverie
Pondering grotesquerie
Rob a bakery
Haiku # 32473, August 14, 2005 3:27 pm ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
Sophie I express my love
For you with this
Bad Haiku
Haiku # 32472, August 14, 2005 10:07 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
reverberations
emanating from plucked strings
Rockin' with Dokken
Haiku # 32471, August 14, 2005 8:51 am ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
theanthropism
god through a human prism
welcoming schism
Haiku # 32470, August 14, 2005 8:49 am ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
once upon a time
i started this short story
and that's all there was
Haiku # 32469, August 14, 2005 6:07 am ET
by ash
I guess I just thought
The phrase "free-form nostalgia"
Deserved a haiku.
Haiku # 32468, August 14, 2005 5:53 am ET
by Liza Lot of Ohio
"Man of the House" flick
is a rotting bucket of
fish heads and oysters
Haiku # 32467, August 14, 2005 3:05 am ET
by Betty Lebomb
suitcase briefcase wall
man hails from columbia
strange reading marquez
Haiku # 32466, August 13, 2005 10:53 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
There's no f***ing way!
Reading Garcia Marquez
Even as I type.
Haiku # 32465, August 13, 2005 5:10 pm ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
just could'nt shake it
the high or improper thought
i made it home okay
Haiku # 32464, August 13, 2005 4:22 pm ET
by florentino ariza of 43431
Bustin' moves atop
A refrigerator box
Gettin' retarded
Haiku # 32463, August 13, 2005 12:43 pm ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
Manipulated
Just like clay for modeling
Red state citizens
Haiku # 32462, August 13, 2005 12:42 pm ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
I can safely say
At the risk of sounding trite
You shouldn't have gone.
Haiku # 32461, August 13, 2005 2:41 am ET
by Liza Lot Less, These Days
Oscar's gone Wilding
William Burroughs for morphine
Jim's a Carrolling
Haiku # 32460, August 12, 2005 8:27 pm ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
Gosh I never knew
My dreams had the makings of
One morbid haiku.
Haiku # 32459, August 12, 2005 5:04 pm ET
by Liza Lot of Ohio
Motionless in fear
Before becoming aware
I have woken up.
Haiku # 32458, August 12, 2005 5:04 pm ET
by Liza Lot of Ohio
Faceless man in hat
He has bleach and a chainsaw
One scary nightmare.
Haiku # 32457, August 12, 2005 5:03 pm ET
by Liza Lot of Ohio
Waxing poetic
Ass drunk in the afternoon
God bless USA
Haiku # 32456, August 12, 2005 3:08 pm ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
Purple mesh tank top
Cut just above the navel
Sartorial bliss
Haiku # 32455, August 12, 2005 3:07 pm ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
All hail Breakin' 2:
[Da] Electric Boogaloo
Cinema splendor
Haiku # 32454, August 12, 2005 3:05 pm ET
by Maestro of Manhattan
if you wanna make
your Daddy parts orange, eat
Cheetos...watch some porn
Haiku # 32453, August 12, 2005 2:02 pm ET
by onjaysun of frogtown (thx dnb)
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