was on the wagon
till the sun set in the west
then I dismounted

whisky soaked raisins
tossed into the birthday cake
my mother made it

fifty six years old
I was so much younger then
the day before that

Such a scorching day
it's not the weather outside
it's a bitch house mate

Huffing gasoline
Plotting array of arsons
Happily, inert

Methamphetamine
Either smoked or injected
Clawing at my flesh

Silent reverie
Pondering grotesquerie
Rob a bakery

Sophie I express my love
For you with this
Bad Haiku

reverberations
emanating from plucked strings
Rockin' with Dokken

theanthropism
god through a human prism
welcoming schism

once upon a time
i started this short story
and that's all there was

I guess I just thought
The phrase "free-form nostalgia"
Deserved a haiku.

"Man of the House" flick
is a rotting bucket of
fish heads and oysters

suitcase briefcase wall
man hails from columbia
strange reading marquez

There's no f***ing way!
Reading Garcia Marquez
Even as I type.

just could'nt shake it
the high or improper thought
i made it home okay

Bustin' moves atop
A refrigerator box
Gettin' retarded

Manipulated
Just like clay for modeling
Red state citizens

I can safely say
At the risk of sounding trite
You shouldn't have gone.

Oscar's gone Wilding
William Burroughs for morphine
Jim's a Carrolling

Gosh I never knew
My dreams had the makings of
One morbid haiku.

Motionless in fear
Before becoming aware
I have woken up.

Faceless man in hat
He has bleach and a chainsaw
One scary nightmare.

Waxing poetic
Ass drunk in the afternoon
God bless USA

Purple mesh tank top
Cut just above the navel
Sartorial bliss

All hail Breakin' 2:
[Da] Electric Boogaloo
Cinema splendor

if you wanna make
your Daddy parts orange, eat
Cheetos...watch some porn

Six turkeys running
in front of car like frickin'
awl Jurassik Pawk!

searching for answers
i gaze into my navel
but i'm long sighted

Grilled cheese is a king
and a true lover of soul
cape of golden brown

Damn, beer after beer
Shedding tears, yet there's more beer
I fear that I'm queer

Pontification
Spewing Dogma from pulpit
Lame-ass balderdash

Kinky girlfriend wants
me to suck toe, chose middle
one, it has roast beef

Smacking that blue vein
Tied off with rubber and spiked
Fare thee well for now

Piltdown Man a hoax.
Where's the bloody missing link?
Damn, dirty apeman!

Fear the hirsute brute
Horrid galloping galoot
Hair is everywhere

Apotheosis:
Dick Van Patten is a God.
I worship his work.

Halls Mentho-Lyptus,
I'm afraid you just can't scratch
That nicotine itch.

balsa is our friend
hail to the micropilots
we do it with dope

the air is too cold
laughter is making me cough
reach for the puffer

One more coffee shot
will do me in for tonight
see you tomorrow

I may be drunken
but I know scanned in balsa
wood when I see it

Of all I have loved
few have touched my bitter heart
as much as mellie

Oh, it's halloween
that's not a candied apple!
grandma has a cock

Heart to weak to pump,
medic alert bracelet call,
grandma has a cock

Coffee liquor bad!
tastes like Sanka and some ass
but it does the trick

"Being There" is good
a movie to make you think
by Jerzy Kosinksi

Caffeine patches are
are for weak of mind and soul
just drink the coffee

With a photo flash
I smile a big phony smile
you are dead to me

I puffed a small pipe
and gave it a great big puff
and now I can fly