Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 70 Days and 78036 Haiku later...
isn't sheena that woman
that runs around naked in
the jungle with george?

well, some lesbians do have
a hard time accepting the
fact two genders exists
Haiku # 28092 April 1, 2003 6:30 pm ET
by Mox
(this has been edited )
Haiku # 28091 April 1, 2003 6:28 pm ET
by scotch of happy april fool's!
Is she offended
by blatant misogyny
well, fuck her, that feminist nazi
bitch, she can go take her weepy
victimization and go watch some
Oprah and read some Toni Morrison
cause I'm not changing.
Haiku # 28090 April 1, 2003 6:22 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
An eye for an eye is just.
Therefore a summary slaughter
of the family of one of our Bible
Belt, corn fed marines would be
highly justified. After all, we're
the one's instigating the eye poking
here. So the Iraqis should not be
held accountable, nor any terrorist,
for returning the favor.
Haiku # 28088 April 1, 2003 6:15 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
Martin Amis blows
almost as much as Kingsley
who's, thankfully, dead
Haiku # 28087 April 1, 2003 6:09 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
you better be on
some serious heavy shit
as your weak excuse
Haiku # 28086 April 1, 2003 6:08 pm ET
by sheena
shocking amazing
how little you use your brain
disintegrating
Haiku # 28085 April 1, 2003 6:06 pm ET
by sheena
(and I don't think you're a bad person, just a "sinner" better off, than say many a self righteous, prick...oh!)
Haiku # 28084 April 1, 2003 3:46 pm ET
by Mox of being a self righteous prick
(and I still like Vonnegut...)
Haiku # 28083 April 1, 2003 3:45 pm ET
by Mox
oh, God said, "just pull the shade"
Haiku # 28082 April 1, 2003 3:44 pm ET
by Mox
I don't know
right now whether I can
be rational or not right now

what would it be like
if some invading army
killed that soldier's family?
Haiku # 28081 April 1, 2003 3:44 pm ET
by Mox
And God said "Let there be light."
And I said "Motherfucker! I'm
trying to get some sleep."
Haiku # 28080 April 1, 2003 3:14 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
Larson's haikus on the other hand
Brilliantly ineffectual, they're like
a succession of Insurance
commercials, you suffer through
them while waiting for the real writers and shows to come back on.
Haiku # 28079 April 1, 2003 2:35 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
S Frustrated groans
"now the banana... push deep"
Robot lover smirks
Haiku # 28078 April 1, 2003 2:30 pm ET
by Richard Larson of Springfield, IL
I hate Bukowski, Ham on Rye
blows, just self indulgent crap.
I write better sentences then
Bukowksi. I'd say I'm more like
a Martin Amis.
Haiku # 28077 April 1, 2003 2:30 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
S Frustrated dreams
of landing on the moon and
Tongue kissing John Glenn
Haiku # 28076 April 1, 2003 2:26 pm ET
by Richard Larson of Springfield, IL
My head hurts. Need nap.
Bored out of my mind, but wait...
uterus hurts too.
Haiku # 28075 April 1, 2003 2:25 pm ET
by cranky monkeygirl
S Frustrated writes
While eating many cupcakes
Fudgey Fingered Keys!
Haiku # 28074 April 1, 2003 2:23 pm ET
by Richard Larson of Springfield, IL
S Frustrated thinks
he is Bukowski, well buk's
Ded and S.F stinks
Haiku # 28073 April 1, 2003 2:21 pm ET
by Richard Larson of Springfield, IL
Man, I love to fuck
Donkeys and smear hot mustard
On my fat belly
Haiku # 28072 April 1, 2003 2:15 pm ET
by Richard Larson of Springfield, IL
Thief of the printed page, ha ha
I will steal everything you write,
And call it my own. (I am the
thief of the thief of the printed page stealing everything you write
and call it my own) this is called
a strange loop or recursion.
Haiku # 28071 April 1, 2003 2:13 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
What sensual, emotive crap
Typical of the female form.
Hasn't been a good woman poet
since Emily Dickinson.
Haiku # 28070 April 1, 2003 2:04 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
The monkey steals too
It is a bad monkey so I
Poke it with a stick
Haiku # 28069 April 1, 2003 2:02 pm ET
by A Student of Artificial insemination via the ear canal
Thief of the printed page...haha
I will steal everything you write,
And call it my own..hahahaaaa!!
Haiku # 28068 April 1, 2003 2:00 pm ET
by Richard Larson of Springfield, IL
hahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa
I steal and plagerize everything!!
I am god-like!! hahahaaaaaaa
Haiku # 28067 April 1, 2003 1:58 pm ET
by Richard Larson of Springfield, IL
Poem of the day
www.poetry.com
I STOLE IT, HAHAHAAAA
Haiku # 28066 April 1, 2003 1:57 pm ET
by Richard Larson of Springfield, IL
A Writer's Companion
You are not a hobby or an aperitif,
a laundry basket I can forget,
or a man I wish were mine.

You are the comfort in the night,
a right flight plan, the only one I have,
a ticket to come by.

The times I begin to doze, you'll nudge me
to a desk, floor, perspectives my weak mind
won't do without, or ask to sleep some more.

Judgement and prescriptions end in
facts and budding truths of lyric
and almost lyrical lines
pulled fresh from your garden.

A ruby fruit for filled pancakes
on the first cold days of autumn.

You are the conjecture,
impetus for getting away
from my warm covers and lovers
this and every morning.

Where are we going at this hour?
Haiku # 28065 April 1, 2003 1:57 pm ET
by Richard Larson of I STOLE POEM OF THE DAY!!
At first she said yes
But it soon turned into no
Now she speaks no more
Haiku # 28063 April 1, 2003 1:10 pm ET
by A Student of Artificial insemination via the ear canal
The audacity of that cunt, getting
up on that podium groaning and
blubbering about her "experience"
with sexual assault. The feminist
audience nods in girlpower
agreement. Wasn't she the one
who necessitated the use of anal
beads in the first place?
Haiku # 28062 April 1, 2003 1:07 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
diary haiku,
sexually frustrated,
writes nice paragraphs.
Haiku # 28061 April 1, 2003 1:06 pm ET
by Cornea Pete (writing a haiku)
She gives you consent
But afterward she's ashamed
It's time to cry rape.
Haiku # 28060 April 1, 2003 12:57 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
The shapely swiveling
hips of grandpa carving
Thanksgiving turkey.
Haiku # 28059 April 1, 2003 12:47 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
She seem to enjoy my finger in
her bum at the time, but two
months later she decides with the
help of her friends that she'd been
raped. I claim it was consentual,
but I'm kicked out of school
anyway. Moral of the story: if
you're going to fuck a girl nasty
style, make sure to kill her
afterwards and dismember the
body.
Haiku # 28058 April 1, 2003 12:33 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
I just love all these boring diary-
haikus being farted out for mass
consumption. I'll try one myself-
I got up today
And started the morning with
a weeping session.
Haiku # 28057 April 1, 2003 12:11 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
Du bist Unternarr
Mit dein Bockwurst mit So
Haiku # 28056 April 1, 2003 10:45 am ET
by A Student of Artificial insemination via the ear canal
learn, as the drugs leave
learn as you lose it, you will
learn, as the drugs leave
Haiku # 28055 April 1, 2003 9:35 am ET
by Jack of Waco
University
I should attend more often
Or I'll be thrown out
Haiku # 28054 April 1, 2003 9:20 am ET
by A Student of Artificial insemination via the ear canal
I wrote too many
got addicted way too fast
can I get a patch?
Haiku # 28053 April 1, 2003 1:59 am ET
by something rosie
please don't leave me yet
pry your fingers from the keys
I might fall apart
Haiku # 28052 April 1, 2003 1:49 am ET
by something rosie
faults she'll never see
through the strong love in her eyes
she's too good for him
Haiku # 28051 April 1, 2003 1:38 am ET
by something rosie
mom says be careful
be careful who you fall for
I should have listened
Haiku # 28050 April 1, 2003 1:28 am ET
by something rosie
school just makes me stress
just to get me out the house
bull shit isn't it?
Haiku # 28049 April 1, 2003 1:22 am ET
by something rosie
look me in the eye
lie to ease my conscience
tell me she's not real
Haiku # 28048 April 1, 2003 1:14 am ET
by something rosie
So I'm addicted,
first step is admiting it
so what happens now?
Haiku # 28047 April 1, 2003 1:06 am ET
by something rosie
you make my lips numb
don't think I can recover
you just say "oh shush"
Haiku # 28046 April 1, 2003 1:02 am ET
by something rosie
making bad haikus
someone said it would be fun
so why the hell not?
Haiku # 28045 April 1, 2003 12:59 am ET
by something rosie
standing on the edge,
i'm thinking about jumping,
the ship is sinking.
Haiku # 28044 April 1, 2003 12:53 am ET
by Cornea Pete
run, flee for your life!
if he's just weird, at least you
indulged in drama.
Haiku # 28043 March 31, 2003 7:17 pm ET
by sheena@computer lab
other scary thing:
he cruises dating websites
more proof pool's shrunk, stunk
Haiku # 28042 March 31, 2003 7:15 pm ET
by sheena@computer lab
famous last words huh
...he seemed shy and innocent
no, trust your instinct!!
Haiku # 28041 March 31, 2003 7:13 pm ET
by sheena@computer lab