i'll kick your fuckin' ass
hit the button one more time,
and i'll shoot you in the foot.

#$@*$
damn it...it's like i can't count
syllable problems

I have now returned
no no my loyal people
no need to kiss my feet

one more bad haiku
you got a problem with that?
i didn't think so

I fear violence
saintly one. your broken hand's
what's worrying me

hey is cattitude
kind of feline attitude?
please explain, I say

Gator will not leave.
To get rid of the Gator,
smash the computer.

wanted weather bug
now i have this gator junk
marketing bastards

I too, wear leather
head to toe I am covered
I'm the man in black

Haiku about poo
is tacky in the extreme
but majorly fun.

It's a ninety nine
six hundred cc's - yellow
would you like a ride?

writers of haiku :
see the button "clear the form" ?
press that one sometimes

life is far too short
we are all going to die
some almighty joke

beesting on my foot
pulstating local swelling
antihistamines

that killing machine
with serious cattitude
honed to a whisker

seriously guys
this is a waste of your life
go do something else

Speaking of Christians
Do Baptists fuck standing up
Dancing cheek to cheek

Poo is God's delight
Even Christians quietly
enjoy a good dump

Sushi makes good poo
slides out nice, easy and slick
It makes happy bung

My life is complete
when my bung sings a sad song
sweet baritone

If I fart in the
woods and my wife doesn't smell it
then, does it still stink?

I feel turds building
Waiting for morning coffee
to release a nice poo

Once upon a time
Paver was master poet
now he just spanks it

hey, is that thing red?
the honda, i mean, baby.
(I dont need the cash)

got my leather on
I insist on a helmut
the head is precious

getting back to now
all the places around here
i have been away

thrity five degrees
I still rode my bike tonight
and it comforts me

perhaps I did speak
language of persuasion, next
I offer them money

mailbox empty still
mel, miss made me sad maybe
my honda wants me

forms are not my friends
i've accidentally not
submitted my name

you have me all wrong
i'm the resident newbie
those were my first posts

A haiku newbie?
Moi? Haiku is my
middle name. Really.

don't mind me, i'm just
as bad a writer as you
that's what we're here for

someone save us all
we're stuck on this board with a
new haiku newbie

mucho me gusta
ir al restaurante
yo tengo hambre

woe is us my friends
four of us, thousands of lines
waste of cyberspace

te quiere un
haiku en espanol, si,
quatro camino?

9thmoon says that you,
the fourth way, watch too much god-
damn television

yep, i've got you babe,
i've got you babe. and know what?
i refuse to cher

my love gives life birth
pain unfolds it's pretty thorns
red blood stains my hands

leave out capitals
and punctuation, still
i am no cummings

four ways in spanish
is this my inquisition?
set my haiku free

Pedro, bad haiku
is like a good bowel movement --
pleasant for the soul.

pedro in cali
how about a haiku treat
make one in spanish

when haikus go bad
the earth groans a groan of pain
i can hear her now

A loan or a gift?
This is the pitiful plot
of all the "judge" shows

biblical ink blots.
interpret rorshach, meshach
and abendego

right here lies this man
convicted of bad writing
poor grog, rest in peace

This addiction is
taking over my shattered life
leading me to ruin