Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
26 Years, 77 Days and 76269 Haiku later...

The party is HERE!
The real party. In haiku.
For a select group.
Haiku # 73514, November 12, 2021 7:05 pm ET
by Not Communist Party of FREEDUMB
What? Whippersnappers?
You mean whipped cream cartridges
from my misspent youth?
Haiku # 73513, November 12, 2021 7:03 pm ET
by Now Whip It of Now Whip It GOOD
Who's this Elton dude?
Opened for Iron Maiden?
My God, I was high.
Haiku # 73512, November 12, 2021 7:01 pm ET
by Run for the Hills!
We salute Janis.
Her site is the last frontier.
True open forum.
Haiku # 73511, November 12, 2021 6:59 pm ET
by 5 then 7 then 5 of Or Die
I am stuck on this.
I am stuck on this album.
Don't you understand?
Haiku # 73510, November 12, 2021 6:56 pm ET
by Needle Stuck In Groove of VINYL
Remember twelve inch.
Back in the early eighties.
It keeps on shrinking.
Haiku # 73509, November 12, 2021 6:56 pm ET
by You whipper-snappers don't know the struggle! of Kilo to terra... Next is peta, you wild animals!
Adam, I hear you...
but Elton's "Love Lies Bleeding"
is such a great song.
Haiku # 73508, November 12, 2021 6:54 pm ET
by Adam of Admin (switch 2 letters)
At my advanced years
a floppy is typical.
Seldom have hard drive.

Please madam, don't byte.
Terabyte my solid state.
Enhanced by high tech.
Haiku # 73507, November 12, 2021 6:52 pm ET
by Floppy diks, as they say in India. of Like Game of Thrones.
Yes, single-sided,
single-density, even.
But for the poems,

this whole site would fit
on a five and a quarter
inch floppy diskette.

Though admittedly
not quite so old to have lived
in a flaccid sleeve,

it did indeed first
travel on three and a half
inches of plastic.
Haiku # 73506, November 12, 2021 6:14 pm ET
by Adam of The Server Side
An ancient art form,
an ancient new medium.
It's relative, but

A quarter of a
century is very old
indeed for the web.

Congratulations
are very much in order
for this Bad Haiku.
Haiku # 73505, November 12, 2021 5:53 pm ET
by Adam of 1996
Your mama. So sweet.
She asked me to have mercy.
I baked her cookies.
Haiku # 73504, November 12, 2021 5:38 pm ET
by Misogyny is Strength of Matriarchy
Your own dear mother
thanked me when I left her bed.
She was still panting.
Haiku # 73503, November 12, 2021 5:32 pm ET
by The Dozens of Yo Mama Obama
No one will step up?
Allright. I will rule from here.
Five syllables. WON.
Haiku # 73502, November 12, 2021 5:30 pm ET
by Haiku as Fight for Dominance of Beta Males
Jamaica Jerk-off:
It's a hilarious take
on the island vibes.
Haiku # 73501, November 12, 2021 5:28 pm ET
by Rock-steady of Jawbone of an Ass
The thing of it is
only one album of his
affects me this way.
Haiku # 73500, November 12, 2021 5:25 pm ET
by Yellow Brick Gold of Auric Splendors
Do you like Elton?
In retrospect, his band ROCKS.
He was really great.
Haiku # 73499, November 12, 2021 5:19 pm ET
by Bernie Taupin of Lyrical Prowess
Seriously folks,
Janis ought to have a crown
for our therapy.
Haiku # 73498, November 12, 2021 5:15 pm ET
by Haiku of Counseling
Oh no I screwed up.
Added extra syllable.
Lost haiku street creds.
Haiku # 73497, November 12, 2021 5:05 pm ET
by Sir Eltonon John John of Cocaine and Glasses
I'm listening to
Goodbye Yellow Brick Road (album)
It really moves me.
Haiku # 73496, November 12, 2021 5:03 pm ET
by Sir Elton Was a Bit of a Martinette though of 70's Delerium
Ooh I'm really mad.
This wicked world is so bad.
Capital of Chad.
Haiku # 73495, November 12, 2021 5:00 pm ET
by N'Djamena of Well It Rhymed . . .
Solid potato salad
Google the Ross sisters, Darth
Good for what ails you
Haiku # 73494, November 12, 2021 4:32 pm ET
by sk
Bear with me, rabbit.
It's your dear fur that I need
Or else I go bare.
Haiku # 73493, November 12, 2021 4:27 pm ET
by The Deer Escaped Alive of Venison
Rabbit, dear, and bear.
Together make hearty stew.
Wear them afterwards.
Haiku # 73492, November 12, 2021 3:11 pm ET
by So you can gain their spirit powers. of Yeah.
Deer is not Kosher.
I told your priest about it.
Eat the beating heart.
Haiku # 73491, November 12, 2021 3:07 pm ET
by Sometimes we have to be animals.
My eighth glass of wine.
The potato salad's great,
but, here, try this ham.
Haiku # 73490, November 12, 2021 3:05 pm ET
by It's so good even Moses would!
Drink wine. See it shine:
My intelligent design.
Now I end the line.
Haiku # 73489, November 12, 2021 2:31 pm ET
by Line of Lines of Janisopolis
potato salad
in hell sounds like a south park
episode really?
Haiku # 73488, November 12, 2021 2:20 pm ET
by vhs
No celebration????
Where's the nude pics of Janis?
The free giveaways?
Haiku # 73487, November 12, 2021 2:19 pm ET
by ???????????
That's all fine and good,
but does it exist in hell?
I'd imagine so.
Haiku # 73486, November 12, 2021 1:10 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
potato salad
exists in fly heaven the
far side told me so
Haiku # 73485, November 12, 2021 12:36 pm ET
by vhs
Okay, but try the
potato salad before
it's all gone, you know.
Haiku # 73483, November 12, 2021 11:10 am ET
by Don't miss out!
There's a little Darth
Figpucker in all of us
and it sure feels good
Haiku # 73482, November 12, 2021 11:02 am ET
by 6th cup of coffee
There is nothing wrong
with being evil today.
Or yesterday too.
Haiku # 73481, November 12, 2021 11:02 am ET
by People love it! of In their secret minds.
Who was it brought that
divine potato salad
with portobello?
Haiku # 73480, November 12, 2021 10:59 am ET
by So unique!
Mixing molasses
and mayonnaise will give you
malaise... right right right.
Haiku # 73479, November 12, 2021 10:50 am ET
by Tell me I'm wrong!
BifurcatingPoo
am who I be, you see now.
All is revealed.

The piggy squealed.
Prosciutto violate.
Ultraviolent.

Look at all that blood.
Thick tar under the moonlight.
You can swim in it.

Horrible buffet.
The potato salad's good.
But that's about it.

Soon the world will end.
The trillionaires all know it.
Escape while you can.
Haiku # 73478, November 12, 2021 10:43 am ET
by Ceti alphs something something
there is a tension
of control and power that
feels like elastic

being pulled, ready
to break, snap and people feel
malaise in the air
Haiku # 73477, November 12, 2021 9:54 am ET
by vhs
censorious twitter
disliking someone on these
mainstream platforms, my...

they'd have had a boo
hoo hoo in the 90s
then be told to shut

the frak up
Haiku # 73476, November 12, 2021 9:49 am ET
by vhs of and I'm the big snowflake on here!
me cat is named as
an adorable critter
a secret agent

his name must not be
but 007 kitty
Haiku # 73475, November 12, 2021 9:26 am ET
by vhs
One of my favourites
Written by Derek old friend
Trois cent eighty-eight
Haiku # 73474, November 12, 2021 6:58 am ET
by Janis of Memory lane
Seriously y'all
Thank you for every dumb poem
But die Russian bots
Haiku # 73473, November 12, 2021 6:48 am ET
by Janis of SQL custodial staff room
Super old website
Some edited css
Man shows up on phone
Haiku # 73472, November 12, 2021 6:42 am ET
by Janis of 25 years of light moderation
This is my cat's name:
Tremble before Jesus Christ,
Your Lord and your Judge.
Haiku # 73470, November 12, 2021 3:10 am ET
by Kitty Kat of Revelation
The Word of the Lord.
We must hear and obey it.
That is our duty.
Haiku # 73469, November 12, 2021 3:05 am ET
by Kind of Obvious.
what is your cat's name, vhs?
Haiku # 73467, November 11, 2021 10:34 pm ET
by Starkitten
it should be shut down
rotten wormy dogs and all
the world will soon end
Haiku # 73466, November 11, 2021 10:06 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Rotten Chinee man:
I will eat you AND your dog.
With my haiku. Burpp.
Haiku # 73465, November 11, 2021 7:18 pm ET
by Japanese Nip of Imperial Rising Sun Shogun Forces
What works what doesn't
Matter of practice trial mood
Display, error, blah
Haiku # 73464, November 11, 2021 6:34 pm ET
by Mox
Well blahnik blahnik blahnik
Let's go blahnik...take
Me to your blahnik
Haiku # 73463, November 11, 2021 5:32 pm ET
by Mox
Moxie/VHS:
Your work displays a certain
indecisive blah . . .
Haiku # 73462, November 11, 2021 5:26 pm ET
by Muh Maine Man of Moxierama
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