Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 157 Days and 77035 Haiku later...

potato salad
exists in fly heaven the
far side told me so
Haiku # 73485, November 12, 2021 12:36 pm ET
by vhs
Okay, but try the
potato salad before
it's all gone, you know.
Haiku # 73483, November 12, 2021 11:10 am ET
by Don't miss out!
There's a little Darth
Figpucker in all of us
and it sure feels good
Haiku # 73482, November 12, 2021 11:02 am ET
by 6th cup of coffee
There is nothing wrong
with being evil today.
Or yesterday too.
Haiku # 73481, November 12, 2021 11:02 am ET
by People love it! of In their secret minds.
Who was it brought that
divine potato salad
with portobello?
Haiku # 73480, November 12, 2021 10:59 am ET
by So unique!
Mixing molasses
and mayonnaise will give you
malaise... right right right.
Haiku # 73479, November 12, 2021 10:50 am ET
by Tell me I'm wrong!
BifurcatingPoo
am who I be, you see now.
All is revealed.

The piggy squealed.
Prosciutto violate.
Ultraviolent.

Look at all that blood.
Thick tar under the moonlight.
You can swim in it.

Horrible buffet.
The potato salad's good.
But that's about it.

Soon the world will end.
The trillionaires all know it.
Escape while you can.
Haiku # 73478, November 12, 2021 10:43 am ET
by Ceti alphs something something
there is a tension
of control and power that
feels like elastic

being pulled, ready
to break, snap and people feel
malaise in the air
Haiku # 73477, November 12, 2021 9:54 am ET
by vhs
censorious twitter
disliking someone on these
mainstream platforms, my...

they'd have had a boo
hoo hoo in the 90s
then be told to shut

the frak up
Haiku # 73476, November 12, 2021 9:49 am ET
by vhs of and I'm the big snowflake on here!
me cat is named as
an adorable critter
a secret agent

his name must not be
but 007 kitty
Haiku # 73475, November 12, 2021 9:26 am ET
by vhs
One of my favourites
Written by Derek old friend
Trois cent eighty-eight
Haiku # 73474, November 12, 2021 6:58 am ET
by Janis of Memory lane
Seriously y'all
Thank you for every dumb poem
But die Russian bots
Haiku # 73473, November 12, 2021 6:48 am ET
by Janis of SQL custodial staff room
Super old website
Some edited css
Man shows up on phone
Haiku # 73472, November 12, 2021 6:42 am ET
by Janis of 25 years of light moderation
This is my cat's name:
Tremble before Jesus Christ,
Your Lord and your Judge.
Haiku # 73470, November 12, 2021 3:10 am ET
by Kitty Kat of Revelation
The Word of the Lord.
We must hear and obey it.
That is our duty.
Haiku # 73469, November 12, 2021 3:05 am ET
by Kind of Obvious.
what is your cat's name, vhs?
Haiku # 73467, November 11, 2021 10:34 pm ET
by Starkitten
it should be shut down
rotten wormy dogs and all
the world will soon end
Haiku # 73466, November 11, 2021 10:06 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Rotten Chinee man:
I will eat you AND your dog.
With my haiku. Burpp.
Haiku # 73465, November 11, 2021 7:18 pm ET
by Japanese Nip of Imperial Rising Sun Shogun Forces
What works what doesn't
Matter of practice trial mood
Display, error, blah
Haiku # 73464, November 11, 2021 6:34 pm ET
by Mox
Well blahnik blahnik blahnik
Let's go blahnik...take
Me to your blahnik
Haiku # 73463, November 11, 2021 5:32 pm ET
by Mox
Moxie/VHS:
Your work displays a certain
indecisive blah . . .
Haiku # 73462, November 11, 2021 5:26 pm ET
by Muh Maine Man of Moxierama
That must be some them
There ruskie bots selling those
Boner pills...bitcoins?
Haiku # 73461, November 11, 2021 3:41 pm ET
by Mox
is it just me or
is living solitude a
state of being, not?
Haiku # 73459, November 11, 2021 2:37 pm ET
by vhs
my cat will not let
me make my bed as he has
claimed it for himself
Haiku # 73458, November 11, 2021 2:15 pm ET
by vhs
well my break ends now
must exercise my right to
move my body now
Haiku # 73457, November 11, 2021 12:53 pm ET
by vhs
what can i do to
convince who is on the end
in toronto to

keep it going?
Haiku # 73456, November 11, 2021 12:48 pm ET
by vhs
do i have to place
a final note to a place
i would cry to see

gone...
Haiku # 73455, November 11, 2021 12:45 pm ET
by vhs
screen will not shrink, too
simple we have become, no
escape, panopti...

con.
Haiku # 73454, November 11, 2021 12:43 pm ET
by mox
the man who speaks of
the rotten verse, i wanted to
pass this place on to

a friend or two :(.

does an emoji count as a syllable?
Haiku # 73453, November 11, 2021 12:39 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
do i need to post
the address of this place to
my twitter to get

writer friend to plead
no dinna do that, i have
cawfee and care free...
Haiku # 73452, November 11, 2021 12:33 pm ET
by mox
my question is must
i paste my condolence to
this place of my past?
Haiku # 73451, November 11, 2021 12:31 pm ET
by vhs
She's "Florida Man" !
I saw her all over news.
They're one and the same.
Haiku # 73450, November 11, 2021 12:21 pm ET
by Florida Woman Himself of Okeefenokee Mangrove Swamp
She's just a rumor . . .
An assumed identity:
Unknown entity.
Haiku # 73449, November 11, 2021 12:19 pm ET
by Wind Whispers Name of Someone
Janis hates snowmen.
She ruthlessly murders them.
They have families.

But she does not care.
By shotgun or flamethrower.
Showing no mercy.
Haiku # 73448, November 11, 2021 10:44 am ET
by I saw it with my own two eyes. of Not made out of coal.
She's a super-bot:
The Janis algorithm.
It's a catchy beat...
Haiku # 73447, November 11, 2021 10:17 am ET
by Rithm is Gonna Get'cha of A.I. Website Creation
Janis is a web nut.
She secretly runs Google.
And the CIA.
Haiku # 73446, November 11, 2021 9:52 am ET
by Except on weekends when she sells crack to grade school kids.
Janis is the Bomb.
Janis is the unsung Queen.
We've never met her . . .
Haiku # 73445, November 11, 2021 9:31 am ET
by To Ronto of To Oronto Toro Nto
As yet, unconfirmed:
Bad Haiku will be shut down.
Janis converted.
Haiku # 73444, November 11, 2021 9:29 am ET
by To Sunni Islam of Uncle Ben's Condoleeza Rice
Will Janis shut down
the website at twenty-five
years of putrid verse?
Haiku # 73443, November 11, 2021 8:45 am ET
by Would be appropiate. of And life would be better.
Well, actually,
I think that she's a woman.
Never know these days.
Haiku # 73442, November 11, 2021 8:43 am ET
by Your confusion has Confucius confused. of Cuntabulate this!
You're completely whacked.
Because you've been whacking off.
Try the Thai massage.
Haiku # 73441, November 11, 2021 8:38 am ET
by Might I recommend the older woman with the tiger tattoo on her shoulder.
I am a fuzzball.
You are a fuzzball. We are
Fuzzballs. With three breasts.
Haiku # 73440, November 11, 2021 8:18 am ET
by Milkers Cubed of To the power of NO
I identify
As a person whose ID
Is completely whacked.
Haiku # 73439, November 11, 2021 8:15 am ET
by Demi-Boy of Dummy Boy with Tampax Inserted
Plead insanity
and you will surely get off.
I get off all day!
Haiku # 73438, November 11, 2021 7:51 am ET
by blahblahblah
I'm needing a brrrrt.
I found one on the dark web.
Too many spyders.
Haiku # 73437, November 11, 2021 7:48 am ET
by LSD Super Soaker of A fine alternative
Every single bomb
that's been released throughout time
makes one of my farts
Haiku # 73436, November 11, 2021 7:45 am ET
by Delusions of Grandsewer
After a long nap,
blowing out all those boogers
like a machine gun.
Haiku # 73435, November 11, 2021 7:43 am ET
by ratta-tat-tat of splatta-splat-splat
Feed us a fetus.
Charitable carpenter.
He's giving me wood.
Haiku # 73434, November 11, 2021 7:40 am ET
by Thief
Every single fart
that's been released throughout time
would make a fine bomb
Haiku # 73433, November 11, 2021 4:41 am ET
by A way out of here
Verily, oh Blob.
Squeejum Squee, swallow thyself!
Not one soul else will.
Haiku # 73432, November 11, 2021 4:35 am ET
by Well, maybe in Africa.
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