Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 39 Days and 77431 Haiku later...

But he's so sexy.
I'm in love with Donald Trump.
He can move on me.
Haiku # 69652, January 17, 2021 12:32 am ET
by Redneck church woman with good reasons to vote. of Nashville
The My Pillow Guy
Bedtime Stories for Old Men
who act like babies
Haiku # 69651, January 17, 2021 12:16 am ET
by Meteorologist of Forecasting Tears of Trumpers
Popcorn?! For breakfast?!
Who the hell you think you are?!
Go watch your Hentai!
Haiku # 69650, January 16, 2021 10:08 pm ET
by Me to my 4 yo son. of Urotsukidoji universe.
Long long pig shlong song.
Extra spicy Jimmy Dean.
You know what I mean.

Grind, stuffed from behind.
Spices and preservatives.
Hold the MSG.

Too greasy for me.
I'll have raisin oatmeal.
Thank you very much.
Haiku # 69649, January 16, 2021 10:01 pm ET
by And a coffee. of course! That goes w/o saying.
It's all a con game.
Whores can't have relationships.
Or happy children.
Haiku # 69648, January 16, 2021 9:54 pm ET
by Here's some money, now leave.
Poop poop poop dink dink.
Darth Darth Darth Darth long pig Darth.
Dinky poopy dink.
Haiku # 69647, January 16, 2021 9:52 pm ET
by Generic Noticer Poem Generator of Download the app at Google Store.
I'm retarded
The relationship's not real
But still fucked it up.
Haiku # 69646, January 16, 2021 6:19 pm ET
by Lacklustre of Hotel Quarantine
Happy New Year!!! www.google.com
Haiku # 69645, January 16, 2021 5:10 pm ET
by Molley www.google.com of a point or extent in space
Oh Darth. You BORE me.
I daresay I'll repeat it:
How you BORE me Darth.
Haiku # 69644, January 16, 2021 3:38 pm ET
by Condescending of Five More Degrees
Hot humid weather
makes the crickets sing loudly.
Predator's coming.
Haiku # 69643, January 16, 2021 8:57 am ET
by Sexual Stealing of Prince's other song.
A hippie pigeon
lives in a pigeon co-op,
And po-ops on cars.
Haiku # 69642, January 16, 2021 7:15 am ET
by Bad Dad Jokes 101
Are pigeons friendly?
Reserve bread crusts from your toast
Pigeon enjoy gifts
Haiku # 69641, January 16, 2021 4:53 am ET
by Pigeon of Pigeon Coop
You are so worthless.
Nothing but a parasite.
Born and raised that way.
Haiku # 69640, January 15, 2021 11:47 pm ET
by Your mom is so proud. of course all your friends as well.
Do not become gay
so you can stay regular.
"Gay" will plug you up!
Haiku # 69639, January 15, 2021 10:53 pm ET
by Constellation Constipation of I just took a stellar dump!
how much will it cost
to hire a prostitute
that one can poop on?
Haiku # 69638, January 15, 2021 10:45 pm ET
by Asking for Noticer. of She's too embarased
Give in to your hate.
Let the Dark Side consume you.
Have a hit of this.
Haiku # 69637, January 15, 2021 10:43 pm ET
by Fulfill your destiny. And my wallet.
Not constipated.
I guess you weren't listening.
But you never did.
Haiku # 69636, January 15, 2021 10:42 pm ET
by Close mouth, open ears, open mind, fart. of Let it all out.
The Honeymoon Suite
A penis dressed like Elvis
rests on crushed velvet
Haiku # 69635, January 15, 2021 10:00 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of TMZ
C'mon high roller
Let's run off to Vegas, Darth
(Clink) Jackpot spilling
Haiku # 69634, January 15, 2021 9:41 pm ET
by Feline Hitchhiker of Getting off on the on ramp
Pigeons are fine birds
Consider it your good luck
when they shit on you
Haiku # 69633, January 15, 2021 9:35 pm ET
by A. Pigeon of Rooftop
Let's Netflix and chill
Sorry about the frostbite
Clam shipped in dry ice
Haiku # 69632, January 15, 2021 9:32 pm ET
by Concerned and Nosy of Undisclosed
Mild Constipation
His Blood Type: Expensive Cheese
Atypical dink
Haiku # 69631, January 15, 2021 9:22 pm ET
by Baffled Physician of holding green stool sample
Hey, get off your ass!
Hey, why are you on my ass?
Hey, you're an asshole.
Haiku # 69630, January 15, 2021 8:07 pm ET
by G. Yurassismelli of Back door
Penis Repair Shop
This one's having a solder
That one can't be fixed
Haiku # 69629, January 15, 2021 8:01 pm ET
by Huge Bill of Invoice on a messy desk
Barracuda jaws
You weren't paying attention
Clampdown on your dink
Haiku # 69628, January 15, 2021 7:58 pm ET
by Martha Raye of Grave
Water bear orgy?!
That's soooo retardigraded!
But I think you'll go.
Haiku # 69627, January 15, 2021 7:33 pm ET
by Box of condoms for your birthday.
Pursuit of penis.
Three is no intellegence.
Tardigrades also fuck.

Strife, puberty, and
the pursuit of a penis.
Alien able.

Emansipation.
Set your own Goddamn self free.
You fat, lazy whore.
Haiku # 69626, January 15, 2021 7:23 pm ET
by The Prostiution of The United States of 'Murica. Emansepation constipation separation -- rid yourself of like shit, I did! I do declare! Forty-second Ammendment.
The drunken pattern.
She Mandel-brought the red wine.
But then he escaped.

Back to the gay bar.
Where things got a bit messy.
BifurcatingPoo.
Haiku # 69625, January 15, 2021 7:02 pm ET
by But I'm sure you knew.
Always in pursuit
Of the bigger better bang.
Pure astrophysics.
Haiku # 69624, January 15, 2021 5:17 pm ET
by Theories of Intelligent Design
Always in pursuit
Of the bigger better bang.
Pure astrophysics.
Haiku # 69623, January 15, 2021 5:16 pm ET
by Theories of Intelligent Design
Solar ejections:
Spasmodic spurts into space
From the corona
Haiku # 69622, January 15, 2021 10:03 am ET
by Sexy Solar Flares of Outer Space
Please do not fear the
gaseous ejaculate.
Here's a free sample.
Haiku # 69621, January 15, 2021 6:56 am ET
by Clean your glasses.
Maybe it's a worm.
Maybe it's a pachyderm.
Ether makes me squirm.
Haiku # 69620, January 15, 2021 6:53 am ET
by Enticer of the snails.
Let us reminisce
the penile flatulence.
Effervescent sperm.
Haiku # 69619, January 15, 2021 2:18 am ET
by Maybe it's a worm.
One-eyed prostitute.
I'll keep an eye out for you.
Glass eye lubricant.
Haiku # 69618, January 15, 2021 2:15 am ET
by Lubricant pube you can't of Find in the behind the old stinky pussy won't-oh
The junk's in the trunk.
I wet humped the cheese thinking
Of your dry pillow.
Haiku # 69617, January 15, 2021 2:11 am ET
by Can't you get your facts straight?! of Nothing but fake news and lies your entire life!
Under old willow
Darth dry humped his pillow. (moan)
whilst thinking of cheese
Haiku # 69616, January 14, 2021 9:41 pm ET
by Legends of of Haiku Fairy Tales
Do you look for slime?
I didn't see much eyeballs
or any pubes
Haiku # 69615, January 14, 2021 9:37 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of Under old willow
The centipede's junk
How do you tell the difference?
Like, what end's the junk?
Haiku # 69614, January 14, 2021 9:34 pm ET
by Carcass Tosser of Haiku Junkyard
When we speak of food,
should it be before eaten,
or when it comes out?

Or continuous
recycling like in The
Human Centipede?

If given a choice,
would you pick the front or back?
That is a tough one!
Haiku # 69613, January 14, 2021 7:11 pm ET
by Poetry Etiquette of Emily Post Toasties
Darth Figpucker's Guide
to the Finer Things in Life
Book Signing (dink pen)
Haiku # 69612, January 14, 2021 4:27 pm ET
by Pen Stealer of Using your pen to write this
Carrots, peas, onions
Beets, scallions, corn, ghost peppers
All haunting my shit
Haiku # 69611, January 14, 2021 4:21 pm ET
by I. Ain't afraid of No Ghost Peckers
Donald's not finished.
Q told me so. It's all fake.
Trump shall RISE AGAIN!
Haiku # 69610, January 14, 2021 10:05 am ET
by A False Preacher of a False Profit
Shniffle doople plonk.
Shlop bop ba loo bop plah-doooo.
Rham-schtankerfiendom.
Haiku # 69609, January 14, 2021 8:58 am ET
by z d x y j
Deserted island
Maybe wearing a loin cloth
Permanent boner
Haiku # 69608, January 14, 2021 7:56 am ET
by Middle Aged of Blue Lagoon
Describe some more food
Almost as good as eating
Say something spicy
Haiku # 69607, January 14, 2021 7:46 am ET
by I'll have of what Darth's having
Bad Haiku News

Trump Impeached again
Flint water: Rick Snyder charged
Trump "Don't pay Rudy"
Haiku # 69606, January 14, 2021 7:25 am ET
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Quarantine boredom
Pleasure myself with haiku
Finish myself off
Haiku # 69605, January 14, 2021 2:40 am ET
by hhtigerlily of Hotel Quarantine
Quarantine boredom
My hot online fantasy
Is just a ghost fuck
Haiku # 69604, January 14, 2021 2:37 am ET
by hhtigerlily of Hotel Quarantine
Why are those boys proud?
They've not done anything good.
Counterexamples?
Haiku # 69603, January 14, 2021 1:20 am ET
by It's a beautiful day in the neigborhood. of A beautiful day for a neighbor.
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