Bad Haiku News
Nashville explosion
New strain of Covid in France
New snake species found
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Time to awaken
Dick Clark's stiff Anaconda
Party til you puke
by Nigel of Boa Constrictor
Little Figpucker
gazes up at the night sky
Flips Santa the bird
by Time Machine of Days of Young Master Figpucker
with all the bullshit
on here I'm getting haiku
and waifu confused...
by vhs
Who's had the squirrels?
Nativity Scene with nuts
Joseph could be rabid
by Foaming of At the mouth
Having multiple personality disorder does not mean that you have committed "gang rape" once that you have raped someone. Now go have a tea party with your imaginary friends like a good little psycho on thorazine.
by Sigmund Frood of Tannin bomber
Who's old enough to
have had a real Christmas tree
in their living room?
by Old Farts Nostalgia Association. of On the edge of Alzheimer's
Gang rape the cocoa.
Throw it at the carolers.
Say it's self defense.
That's their punishment.
And it's a light one at that!
For singing off key.
by DW of What kind of "God" allows his worshipers to sing so badly?!
Mannequin Hogpile
Get your smelly plastic twat
Out of my face, bitch
by J C.Penney of Closed for the Holidays
Why not gang rape
the carolers at your door?
Save on hot cocoa
by Frugal of Dooryard
Please save your receipt
should you wish to return or
exchange this whore
by DW of Pimp Ethics and Standards Committee
On a bear skin rug
Figpucker, The New Fragrance
For the New Horny
by Masculine yet feminine of With some fruity notes
Try blowing your nose.
But know that if nothing comes out,
it's all been for snot.
by budda boom budda bing
Irresistible
Your buoy bobbing on seafoam
Now, feeding frenzy
by Jock Itch Cousteau of Down Below
Please save your receipt
should you wish to return or
exchange this haiku
by Bitch of The Management
If Santa loves me,
I've not been naughty enough.
Satan, however...
by Not naughty, all for naught at forty knots of Knotty Pines, nautical resort.
i feel good but grim
today, like this was a break
for what matters most
by vhs
Jesus Christ is Lord!
Oppose Him at your own risk
Oh condemned sinner.
by Friendly Local Milquetoast Pastor of Xmas
Dear little Figpuck:
Although you have been naughty,
Santa still loves you
by Elf Efficacy of Sickbag
fourth turning and
xmas, still we need to cross
the river on ice
by vhs of maga or rewind?
Just relax fella...
It's Christmas for zombies too
Green bean casserole
by Ball sack inspector
You are pathetic.
That is because you are here.
Jesus, it's Chistmas!
by Now go away and dont come back until Jan. 15. of In a room.
When zombies wake up
The first thing to reinflate
is their dead ball sack
After a quick peek
Most will hit the ground running
Double check your door
by North American of Zombie Watch
Well, since we can't kiss
Would you mind if I groped you
during this bad plague?
by Hans Allover of Hard to reach areas
seven Covid deaths
all linked to one sick person
feeling sick? stay home!
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Donald Trump hit links
Congress goes on vacation
While Country suffers
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Jewish people and
Chinese food on Christmas? No!
It's every damn day!
by Oy vay, more sacred than the commandments! of Schezchwan pork... Kosher enough.
Why did she leave you?
Too much math? Red lipstick stains?
Pencil Protector?
by Drunk of Floor
If you are my Ex,
I hope you get HIV
and Covid-19.
by On the same day. of All I want for Christmas.
Ok Figpucker
Tell us about your presents
What did Santa bring?
by Drunk of Barstool
We wish you a Merry Covid
And a Happy Mutated Virus.
From China with Love (of money).
Bc all commies love money and power.
by Mr Hankey's pet cat Sparkles. of Bc why not.
For Ex gyn exam.
Broken brokered vagina.
Not worth a damn thing.
by And quite stinky!!!
forex can be quite.
the scam as it is so you
know games people play
money money money
by vhs
Vad är valutahandel. https://se.forex-is.com
by ForexGync of Lowest spread forex brokers
Wishing Peace on Earth
Merry Christmas to your dink
from my vagina
by No More Wars of Too Busy Getting it On
you know organized
crime seems to be the subset
guv ment's right into
by vhs
Trump pardoned those who
The Demonrat's false framed
Don't forget it tools.
Biden family crimes
Are real and easy to see
its all in the laptop.
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Erlick took the money
Miss Fang Fang fook fooked for.
And got elected
Swellwell hated Trump
And hollered he is a spy!
As Fang and Xi laugh
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
Erlick its Fang Fang
You gave me a bug- bas-turd!
But I bugged you!
Mao down there in hell
Is watching your blue movies
laughing and smoking.
Yankees are stupid
a dork like you on Intell?
Low info voters
How cool is that huh?
They thought Trump was a agent!
We fooled them damn good!
by Wong Lofan of Kalifornia
so what do people
do to shut down a world psyop
when we fear punks
by moxie
COVID is all hype.
Ninety percent survival,
No different from flu
by But it Helps their Reset of Course
Trump goes on rampage
Pardons, Relief veto threats
more Covid denial
by Crimson Mind of Phoenix, AZ
Hello Wong Lofan !
Merry Christmas to you, sir.
Time to write haiku.
by Eric Swalwell of Swallowed Badly
oh you are still on
here, let the user beware
merry xmas...fnord
by moxie
For Christmas this year
I'm getting ink on my dink.
"Fuck Covid-19!"
That's all there's room for...
after your mom's name on there.
I was really drunk.
by Darth Whorrendous of This Christmas tell your mom I said hi. And leave me some eggnog.
It wasn't a cross.
It was the first Christmas tree.
Jesus was naked.
So Christmas tree balls,
you know what they represent.
Dangling innocence.
by In a sense, the Little Drummer Boy. of Incence. Frakly. Myrrh is overrated. I'll take the gold though.
Nailed to the cross
I ordered a Large Pizza
with free Garlic Knots
by Diary of Jesus H.Christ of Pocket of Flowing Robe
Jesus the trickster.
Christ did not walk on water.
He used a surfboard.
by Long haired longboarding hippie.
Santa saved my soul.
Jesus came down my chimney.
It sure did smell weird.
by Where's my Xmas tree pine air freshener? of Oh, that's right, I smoked it.
Don't forget cookies.
Made with some Turkish Hashish.
That's how Santa flies.
by Flew up the flue. of Don't get the flu!
