Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 167 Days and 77048 Haiku later...

Frogs have green testes.
Tadpoles are hyperactive.
Use AXE shower gel.
Haiku # 68999, December 6, 2020 4:32 pm ET
by So you can be a real man.
William Barr, fatass,
Pardoned Ruby Ridge killers.
Don't trust this swamp toad.
Haiku # 68998, December 6, 2020 3:58 pm ET
by Familiar Refrain of Ribit Ribit Ribit
Testicular green.
Zombies and Jolly Giants.
Blueberries are gay.
Haiku # 68997, December 5, 2020 9:31 pm ET
by Have you ever had an Asian prostitute ask you if you'd like to squeeze one or both of your balls into her anus? of Well, then you haven't lived, boy!
Walked to the men's room
He was playing the same note
when I got back there
Haiku # 68996, December 5, 2020 1:20 pm ET
by Snake of Occasionally mistaken for neck of guitar
Santa is Satan
Santa Ana is windy
St. Ana is hot
Haiku # 68995, December 5, 2020 11:47 am ET
by Carlos Santana of Shredsville CA
it's almost that time
santa the covid vector
will be bringing death
Haiku # 68994, December 5, 2020 6:40 am ET
by ash
TYPING IN ALL CAPS
THE PUNCTUATION BONER
DON'T MAKE THAT MISTAKE
Haiku # 68993, December 4, 2020 10:39 pm ET
by PUNK
Ladies in hairnets
Excuse me for a moment..
Now, that's a turn on
Haiku # 68992, December 4, 2020 8:58 pm ET
by Pervert of Bad Haiku, Canadian Edition
Meat Tenderizer
Emeril Lagasse's cock
Bam Bam Bam Bam Bam!
Haiku # 68991, December 4, 2020 8:53 pm ET
by Tonic Drinker of Marblehead, Massachusetts
Cock A Doodle YOU
The secret ingredient
For my longpig stew
Haiku # 68990, December 4, 2020 7:25 pm ET
by Cannibal at Large of Food Channel
Dangerous pastimes
Dad took his son out fishing
Son now has one eye
Haiku # 68989, December 4, 2020 7:22 pm ET
by Half submerged boot of Undisclosed
Get bicycle smiles
Genuine banana seat
Fresh phallus fruit
Haiku # 68988, December 4, 2020 7:16 pm ET
by Tongue Twister of New Westminster, BC CA hairnet
I racked my balls hard on the bicycle's middle bar when i had to stop quicklty and I am sure vhs finds this to be the most entertaining thing hes heard all week. He needs a blow job. Someone volunteer.
Haiku # 68987, December 4, 2020 4:35 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Remember how cool
'Momma mia et me go'
was back in the day.
Haiku # 68986, December 4, 2020 4:32 pm ET
by Freddie Krueger liquid heavy meyal
Just get over it
Trumps loss was so fucking huuuuuge
Even Willie Barr knows
Haiku # 68985, December 4, 2020 1:15 pm ET
by Now go back to your tinker bell tv
Fatass William Barr
Swamp toad par excellence
Shows us who he is.
Haiku # 68984, December 4, 2020 8:31 am ET
by Ribit Like An Amphibian of Republican Deep Swamp
Marxists: they rely
On those too stupid to know
What Marxism is.
Haiku # 68983, December 4, 2020 8:28 am ET
by Vladimir Illyich Jones of Detroit Motor City y'all
Raped by cotton swab.
Nasally violated.
Will I get pregnant?
Haiku # 68982, December 4, 2020 5:57 am ET
by DW of Lablab. (I am sexually hyperactive, thanks for asking.)
The milkman's daughter
Blushes with each gentle pull
'til the bucket's full
Haiku # 68981, December 3, 2020 9:21 pm ET
by I. Mayhave of Watched The Wicker Man too many times
Covid cow is dead.
Globalists milked her to death
trying to get reset.
Haiku # 68980, December 3, 2020 7:54 pm ET
by Mooooooo of Swinging Udders
The Dr. asks Darth
Are you sexually active?
"I'm jerking off now."
Haiku # 68979, December 3, 2020 5:57 pm ET
by Physician's Office of Phillipines
The censors nixed me.
My Odysee led me here:
"Payback's a Bitchute".

https://tinyurl.com/yyqcd5cj
Haiku # 68978, December 3, 2020 10:04 am ET
by Jacob Rosenbaum of Hell
Do you charge extra
to bathe my anus with love?
One hundred pisos?

Yes, that's my rectum.
No, it's not a fire hose.
Though it's got pressure.
Haiku # 68977, December 3, 2020 3:15 am ET
by dw of I'll use it to paint your house.
What's the difference, Darth?
Are farts the same thing as shit?
Like water and ice?
Haiku # 68976, December 2, 2020 10:14 pm ET
by S. Brownstain of Flatulent Earth Society
They hang in the air
The same way that goodbye does when it's forever
Haiku # 68975, December 2, 2020 9:58 pm ET
by Toot
Molecules of farts
Under magnification
Reveal Hitler's face
Haiku # 68974, December 2, 2020 9:53 pm ET
by Noticer of Details of Behind microscope
Darth Darth Darth...(unh)...Darth
Darth (unh) Whorrendous Darth GOSH
I'm farting a lot.
Haiku # 68973, December 2, 2020 9:26 pm ET
by Methane, Myself and Ithane
fart fart fart fart fart
fart fart fart fart fart fart fart
fart fart fart fart fart
Haiku # 68972, December 2, 2020 8:30 pm ET
by unknown of Fart Farm
Bought forty acres
Starting up my own Fart Farm
Guess it's milking time
Haiku # 68971, December 2, 2020 4:14 pm ET
by Fart Farmer of Fart Farm
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
this sums up 2020
Haiku # 68970, December 2, 2020 12:33 pm ET
by Your mom of Texas
vhs won't eat
He's been off his feed these days
Ever since Trump lost
Haiku # 68969, December 2, 2020 3:43 am ET
by Noticer of Details of Under old willow
We'll take care of you
Would you like a sponge bath, Darth?
We're smoking hot twins...
Haiku # 68968, December 1, 2020 9:01 pm ET
by Bathy Kates of Conjoined
Who will we eat first?
I say vhs; he's clean.
Got knows what I have!
Haiku # 68967, December 1, 2020 8:47 pm ET
by dw of Air Borne Ebola
Let's talk about it
Let's talk cannibalism
Fuck talking, let's eat
Haiku # 68966, December 1, 2020 6:03 pm ET
by Cannibal of I smell Hoomans
It's near to farting.
The British one-fourth penny
is called a farthing.

They should also have
a shithing and pithing coin too.
They they'll be complete.
Haiku # 68965, December 1, 2020 2:05 pm ET
by A full range of functions.
You seen that snake guy?
He gets high off snake venom.
Injects it often.

He never gets sick.
It gives him super powers.
At least it's not meth.
Haiku # 68964, December 1, 2020 12:43 pm ET
by I think I'll try jelly fish venom. of :-O
A coincidence?
You walked past the snake charmer
and got a boner
Haiku # 68963, December 1, 2020 7:28 am ET
by I. Sawit of Surveillance cameras
I don't want to see
Your colony down under.
(Butt maybe Ash does...)
Haiku # 68962, December 1, 2020 2:30 am ET
by Don't Make an Ass of Yourself of Netherworlds of Darth
I clicked on that link
It looked like an abacus
shoved in a ham

It was your asshole!
I must say, you are handsome
from either end, Darth
Haiku # 68961, November 30, 2020 9:45 pm ET
by Your secret admirer of Either End
Picnics and parties.
Cute puppy dogs and kittens.
Fluffy clouds and stuff.
Haiku # 68960, November 30, 2020 9:17 pm ET
by Everything is fine. of Trust me.
Maybe a world run
by the New Chinese Empire
might not be so bad.
Haiku # 68959, November 30, 2020 8:52 pm ET
by Criminals flourish under communism. of And I am nothing if not a criminal. Whores? Check. Drugs? Check. Weapons? Check. Surfboard? Check.
That last post links to
a picture of my asshole.
In case you need it.
Haiku # 68958, November 30, 2020 8:46 pm ET
by dw
https://static.ffx.io/images/$zoom_0.346%2C$multiply_2.1164%2C$ratio_1.5%2C$width_756%2C$x_86%2C$y_0/t_crop_custom/q_62%2Cf_auto/fc5a4891a86ecae4caee529c6ee5b87297165119
Haiku # 68957, November 30, 2020 7:55 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
all hail xi xinping
emperor who will be king
world dynastic fling
Haiku # 68956, November 30, 2020 7:08 pm ET
by ash of a colony down under
i see he is still
at it and i have lost all faith
in syllables.
Haiku # 68955, November 30, 2020 1:39 pm ET
by vhs
Great TP idea.
2020 calendar.
Year's not over yet.

What shite occurs next?
I can hardly wait to see.
Planet of The Apes.
Haiku # 68954, November 30, 2020 5:57 am ET
by Put the funt back in the cart. of NOW!
I just took a shit
Then I wiped my big fat ass
with the calendar
Haiku # 68953, November 30, 2020 1:27 am ET
by Father Time of (Flushing Sound)
Standing in the queue
Your breath has fogged my glasses
Six feet is the rule
Haiku # 68952, November 30, 2020 1:03 am ET
by Betty LeBomb
Ching Chong Chinaman:
Didn't know how to milk a cow
(Except H. Biden.)
Haiku # 68951, November 29, 2020 10:07 pm ET
by Worthy Gentleman of Celestial Kingdom
Chinese
Japanese
Dirty knees
Look at these!
Haiku # 68950, November 29, 2020 8:26 pm ET
by Baby Firefly
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