Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 30 Days and 77414 Haiku later...

Keep slapping that ham,
oh grand Sensei of Haiku.
May it help your verse.
Haiku # 61599, January 10, 2019 8:25 am ET
by Syllababically Challenged of Sillabobbles

Free cassettes? Right on.
ABBA, Pink Floyd... forget Bjork.
I'll use my Walkman.
Haiku # 61598, January 10, 2019 8:16 am ET
by Syd Faltskog of That wicked syncopated ragtime
Turning to butter
Penis slapping. Running top speed
You'll never catch me
Haiku # 61597, January 10, 2019 6:17 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Human Pyramid
Bulimic Cheerleader Blows
Laxative Lava
Haiku # 61596, January 10, 2019 5:22 am ET
by Hawaiian Rainbows of HeyIwannaleiya
The drunken in laws
I pissed in their lemonade
I watch them drink it
Haiku # 61595, January 10, 2019 5:17 am ET
by Urine Goodhands
Sometimes when I run
My penis slaps my legs hard
Then I run faster
Haiku # 61594, January 10, 2019 5:14 am ET
by Insane Bolt of Ahead of You
Seeking employment
Acceptance in the workplace
Got a smelly bum
Haiku # 61593, January 10, 2019 5:11 am ET
by It won't come clean
Fill out all the forms
Magazine subscriptions come
Never pay for them
Haiku # 61592, January 10, 2019 5:07 am ET
by I take issue with this of Periodically
Lonely at the top
Haiku misers! Hoarders, all!
Just what will it take
Haiku # 61591, January 10, 2019 4:07 am ET
by Mooning You All of Barstool
The Real Starkitten
Meow meow meow meow meow meow meow
I am Starkitten
Haiku # 61590, January 9, 2019 3:09 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Ten Penny Henry
Extra penny for your thoughts
They verge on dirty
Haiku # 61589, January 9, 2019 3:05 pm ET
by Come On Eileen of Ta loo rye ay
There is soup in my fly
Creme d Trousertrout
Haiku # 61588, January 9, 2019 3:00 pm ET
by Frenchy
Wardrobe Malfunction
Waiter, there
Haiku # 61587, January 9, 2019 2:59 pm ET
by Frenchy of Oooo lala
Columbia House
Free cassettes for VHS
ABBA, Pink Floyd, Bjork
Haiku # 61586, January 9, 2019 2:53 pm ET
by 12 for a penny
Escargot leaves trail
Are we there yet? No, not yet.
Are we there yet? Soon
Haiku # 61585, January 9, 2019 2:51 pm ET
by Almost there of Snail trail
Enjoyable when you are hella baked
Like Funyuns and basically all food
Haiku # 61584, January 9, 2019 1:58 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I would imagine
This website
Haiku # 61583, January 9, 2019 1:56 pm ET
by Puffgiggles of Gigglepuffs
I hope v.h.s.
is still alive and typing.
he seemed so depressed.
Haiku # 61582, January 9, 2019 8:32 am ET
by Downeast of Southwest
How much puck would a
Figpucker puck if a Fig
pucker could puck fig?

Kitten versus star:
Feline musings wander far
Bookish avatar
Haiku # 61581, January 9, 2019 8:28 am ET
by Haiku Disinformation of Front Operation
More verse about Trump...
greatest statesman and leader
since old Abe Lincoln!
Haiku # 61580, January 9, 2019 8:19 am ET
by Donaldian Sources of Poetic Inspiration
A morning quickie:
getting it on with my muse
Thanks love, that was fun.
Haiku # 61579, January 9, 2019 8:15 am ET
by Wham Bam of Thank You Haiku
Under surveillance
No ordinary pervert
Dad's got a hard on
Haiku # 61578, January 8, 2019 11:09 pm ET
by Ivanka Trump of Toadstool polisher
Books were overdue
LIBRARIAN STABS BOOKWORM!
Throw the book at him
Haiku # 61577, January 8, 2019 10:58 pm ET
by Fitting Punishment
Quiet Library
Clicking of high heels. A scream.
Murder Mystery
Haiku # 61576, January 8, 2019 10:53 pm ET
by Reading Rainbow
I'm gonna catch heck
Leaving this tremendous poop
In your toilet bowl
Haiku # 61575, January 8, 2019 10:50 pm ET
by Don't Mind Me of Collision Course with Colitis
Origami Fold
Defecate Japanese style
Delicate brown bird
Haiku # 61574, January 8, 2019 8:18 pm ET
by One ply
A wall made of bricks
Each one gold. Each one I shit.
Tremendous, my bricks.
Haiku # 61573, January 8, 2019 7:25 pm ET
by Toadstool dick
Nasal Spelunking
Bring home a green souvenir
On your fingertip
Haiku # 61572, January 8, 2019 6:20 pm ET
by Pokey of Poconos ( Beautiful Mt. Airy Lodge)
Where is Figpucker?
Joined the priesthood?Arrested?
Need some of his sass
Haiku # 61571, January 8, 2019 6:13 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Neurotic liberals
As far as the eye can see
Projecting their peeve
Haiku # 61570, January 8, 2019 3:47 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Get well soon, poet
Prescription Refillable
Healing Syllables
Haiku # 61569, January 8, 2019 2:51 pm ET
by Doc sk of Bad Haiku
Crud won't go away
I'll stay home again today
Call or text, okay
Haiku # 61568, January 8, 2019 1:14 pm ET
by pudding tame of Earth
Admit your mistake
Voting for Angry Orange
What were you thinking?
Haiku # 61567, January 8, 2019 10:15 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Racists hate Cheetos.
Haters hate our president.
(We know he's a saint.)
Haiku # 61566, January 8, 2019 7:54 am ET
by Neurotic Projections of The Left
Spiritual gas
Rising sky high from my ass
This poop soon shall pass
Haiku # 61565, January 8, 2019 7:48 am ET
by Passwinder of Holditinder
Survival Food Kit
One fat mama cass sandwich
With a moistmaker
Haiku # 61564, January 8, 2019 7:20 am ET
by Prepared
Old cunt lips flapping
Mud flaps on grandad's pickup
Grandma rides shotgun
Haiku # 61563, January 8, 2019 7:06 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
When you are the best
The best part is the best smell
That comes from your farts
Haiku # 61562, January 8, 2019 7:01 am ET
by Sniffy
Pizza is my friend
Circle triangle yum yum
Chomp chomp fart fart fart
Haiku # 61561, January 8, 2019 5:35 am ET
by Greasy Pete of Poop pants
Appreciation
Couldn't they show it just once
No. Shit in their soup.
Haiku # 61560, January 8, 2019 5:29 am ET
by Alice of Brady Residence
He farted toothpaste
Freak of nature. Minty Fresh.
Smelly Cavity
Haiku # 61559, January 8, 2019 4:22 am ET
by Fangtooth
Kimono Bad stain
Ancient Japanese Secret
Use toilet paper
Haiku # 61558, January 8, 2019 4:20 am ET
by Kaka PooPoo of Terlit
Vagina Sniffer
The pay stinks. the cunt stinks too
Nose to the grindstone
Haiku # 61557, January 8, 2019 4:18 am ET
by Jack Off of Box
Potato hard on
Ejaculating Spud
Potato stick spew
Haiku # 61556, January 8, 2019 4:15 am ET
by Vegetables are gross
Everlasting Fart
Dense cloud hovering, drone like
Mission Accomplished
Haiku # 61555, January 8, 2019 4:13 am ET
by E. mission of In the air tonight
Crumble stale Cheeto
Defective and past shelf life
Bloated, racist pig
Haiku # 61554, January 8, 2019 12:32 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Here lies Swollen Gland
Buried with his dick in hand
Death Boner unplanned
Haiku # 61553, January 7, 2019 7:28 pm ET
by Life is weird of Smegmatery
Only Indians
are truly spiritual.
We white men are not.
Haiku # 61552, January 7, 2019 7:27 pm ET
by Professional Indian-Lover of the Vavished West
Standing on the corpse
Activated ding dong nerve
Funeral postponed
Haiku # 61551, January 7, 2019 7:21 pm ET
by Couldn
Shogun of hung low
Lost his danoinks with one blow
From the Blunderbuss
Haiku # 61550, January 7, 2019 7:18 pm ET
by Gun Shy
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