I would like some pie.
Anything except mince meat.
That shit is nasty.
by df
A cork's in your ass?!
I won't kiss your camel toe!
Don't want a face full.
by df
Cockburpcock so drunk
Oopsie stuck wine cork in ass
Pressure Cooker BOMB
by Boom Boom of Boom Boom Room
It's much more festive
to kiss under camel toe.
Mistletoe is dumb.
by df
Baby,..Cold outside
Bring us some Figgy Pudding
Cameltoe kissing
by Kringle of Mingle
Shy Figpucker
Kissing under camel toe
Your rum balls are fine
by Juicy Joyce of Basketball game
Cuntfart Quaint fart
Tiptoe Tiptoe Blunderbuss
Queef Cacophany
by Toot
*cockburpcock
Too much wine.
by Anonymous Poet
Hugh Hefner's bathrobe
Limp, lonely and forgotten
Hung behind the door
by Sleaze of Playboy Mansion
inappropriate
cuntfartcunt and cockburbcock
fishy mushroom sauce
by Anonymous poet of Lower case p. As in p on me.
I have overcome
Foul images and Haiku.
Bring it ON, mortals.
by Anonymous Poet
Ever Grimacing
New Jersey Constipation
Greetings from Springsteen
by Assberry Park of Wish you were here
Erect Santa Claus
Reindeer pulling sleigh and dink
Coming down chimney
by Seeing Things of Frosty windowpane
Walking down the street
Stopping to squish. Turtle trap.
Walking down the street
by Squisher
Grizzly Bear Christmas
Tree Decorating Party
Tinsel: Human remains
by T. Treadwell of Around
Andy Williams croons
Santa in repose on couch
Stiff drink and stiff dink
by That drunk Christmas painter of Sunday Paper advertisement
It might not be snot
But I hella need Kleenex
For my lower nose
by Garden Gnome of Kmart Warehouse
Is that you Sneezy!?
Are you fucking serious?
Sneezy was a dwarf!
by Overheard at Kmart Warehouse
Garden gnome orgy
Kmart warehouse.ugh ugh oooooooooooooooooooooooohhh!
GIANT ORGASM
by K. Martino of The Gut
Bleeding frog colors
red and green - how Christmassy.
Is that a real word?
by Funtcart Funt
As the story goes,
'Twas the cunt before Christmas
and all through the fart.
Not a creature was
fucking, not even a pig.
The condoms were hung
so they'll be re-used
because crack-whores are cheap as fucking shit
and I'm too lazy to continue this in haiku form.
by Cunts cocks farts poop piss floppy titties and bouncing testes
Sing:"Blood in the streets.."
Croaked? Peace Frog Accident Wreck
Have it toad away
by Miss Piggy of Law offices of Cuntfart Cuntfart and Cunt
Saw an injured frog.
It was bleeding in the street.
I should have killed it.
by Anonymous Poet
Radioactive
Fish of Honshu, upstream twerk
Mooncake urinal chunk
by Kimono O'Flappery of Spent a few days with a small dog
Rock rat Honshu life
Your own happiness is now
Gnawing small branches
by Honshu windy flapping kimono of Kimono dragon
But on second thought
Better keep it in your pants
His is way bigger
by Measures with Ruler
They're not really kids
Google "Little Superstar"
I think he's a dwarf
by Midget
I am sure these kids
see white mens' peckers often.
One more won't phase them.
by Anonymous Poet
Soften the Grinch heart
Open your door. Song! Rejoice!
Show them your pecker
by Good Advice
The children carol.
Not out of love for Jesus.
They just want money.
Future prostitutes.
Preachers or politicians.
Singing out of tune.
I tell them "Shut up!
Go away and don't come back!
Until you can sing!"
Talentless monkeys.
Fleas from a street dog's backside.
Begging for my blood.
Proof there is no God.
If there were, he would kill them.
So that's their purpose.
by Anonymous Poet
Honshu scry monkeys
Poo Flinging Ceremony
Wear brown kimono
by Wardrobe Consultant of Coming out of the Closet
Pan drippings?..What the?..
I thought it said pants drippings
Tasty brown gravy
by Captain of Gravy Boat
Dishonorable
Discharge. Running down your leg.
Fast as Usain Bolt
by Person in the know
Spain Christmas kaka
Kids hit the log with a stick
And presents appear
by Teletubbies viewer
God God God God Good
Devil Devil Devil Bad
God good Devil bad
by Anonymous Poet
Honshu River rat
Happy. Fat gut. Nibbling mooncake.
Rat thinks, "Gid is Good."
by Rat Finks of Honshu Bridge
Love God then hate God
He is everywhere. Absent.
Still waiting for Him.
by Someone's Cue to Blaspheme
Honshu river bridge
Cherry blossoms of spring moon . . .
Similar Jap stuff
by Yo Mama of Yokohama
To enjoy Christmas
Listen to Spanish carols
It's way more lively
by El Desdichado of Gringolandia
Let's face it. God sucks.
Made Grizzly bears to kill us
Gave men small ding dongs
by Smote Avoider of Hanging upside down from church railing
I would like to die.
Nothing in life gives me joy.
I am just a tool.
I believe in God.
I believe absolutely.
That He hates us all.
He sits on His throne,
gold, gems, and perls, watching.
Sickness, war, and death.
Pain and misery.
And He laughs watching it all,
despising humans.
by Happy Holy Days of Israel, Golgatha
Mama Cass sandwich.
Maximum Moistmaker
Homemade Mayonnaise
by Spreading her legs and condiments of Cunt Canyon
Stopped in to a church
How 'bout confessing to incest.
On a winter's day
by Pervert Police of Laurel Canyon
Live: Arsonist Nabbed
Cuffed whilst sipping hot cocoa
Admiring the flames
by Haiku News
warm hot chocolate
sitting by an open flame
on a winters day
by Anonymous Poet
as the snow lies deep
I crack open the Bailey's
sobriety gone
by Anonymous Poet
Your Haiku news source
Up next, Darth's longpig forecast
And dink stretching show
by Wella Balsam Conditioner of Promotional consideration
FedEx box cat pan
When full, tape shut. Leave on porch.
Homemade shitter bomb
by Starkitten of Litter Pan
Öklongig vertiik
Meuadischu svlegan haiku
Vertiik blaschen shite
by Sven
South Park Christmas Poo
Xmas Toilet Overflow
Walton
by Wholesome of Homestead
