I would like to die.
Nothing in life gives me joy.
I am just a tool.
I believe in God.
I believe absolutely.
That He hates us all.
He sits on His throne,
gold, gems, and perls, watching.
Sickness, war, and death.
Pain and misery.
And He laughs watching it all,
despising humans.
by Happy Holy Days of Israel, Golgatha
Mama Cass sandwich.
Maximum Moistmaker
Homemade Mayonnaise
by Spreading her legs and condiments of Cunt Canyon
Stopped in to a church
How 'bout confessing to incest.
On a winter's day
by Pervert Police of Laurel Canyon
Live: Arsonist Nabbed
Cuffed whilst sipping hot cocoa
Admiring the flames
by Haiku News
warm hot chocolate
sitting by an open flame
on a winters day
by Anonymous Poet
as the snow lies deep
I crack open the Bailey's
sobriety gone
by Anonymous Poet
Your Haiku news source
Up next, Darth's longpig forecast
And dink stretching show
by Wella Balsam Conditioner of Promotional consideration
FedEx box cat pan
When full, tape shut. Leave on porch.
Homemade shitter bomb
by Starkitten of Litter Pan
Öklongig vertiik
Meuadischu svlegan haiku
Vertiik blaschen shite
by Sven
South Park Christmas Poo
Xmas Toilet Overflow
Walton
by Wholesome of Homestead
Pervert Truckdriver
Boofing tied up runaways
Hogtied Highway Hump
by Normal Person
Perverts here and there
Perverts Perverts Everywhere
Basement Dungeon Boof
by Cellar Door
The Dutroux affair !
What is it about Belgium?
Something sinister . . .
But now back to Darth:
His righteous Biblical verse
is our salvation.
Figpucker has it:
that certain je ne sais quoi
that attracts green flies
by Fig Darthpucker of Trigonometric Parabolic
Skin Flint, Guy Smiley
Father Time, Mister Man, Slimdick.
Adolph Q. Hitler
by Nicknames
Gaylord Cuntsnapper
Pig driller, Man about Town
Lord of the Manor
by Asinine Fool of Sing Sing (Sing)
Figpucker: more farts.
More excrement and more filth.
And WAY more sex too.
by Darth is too puritanical and rigidly moral
That's a bad smell
Concentrated egg farts whiff!!
It hangs in the air
by Rigging up this booby trap we will catch perverts like you
Feeling inspired now
Rigged up a fart spray device
Protect my beaver
by Inventor
Instant Pot Grinch Stew
Tangy snappy vaginas
Served a la 'jaculate
by Bob Cajun of Bobcaygeon
Calls for tradition
Fisting Sans Lubricant Eve
Make room for daddy
by Troughslurper of Telegraph Hill
"Santa's testicles".
Christmas meatball recipe.
In white creamy sauce.
Bell pepper and mint.
Perfect red and green garnish.
Straight rum, no egg nog.
Cuntfart Cunt's dry scabs
fly out of her vagina
like a glitter bomb.
by Cholesterol through the roof! of Watching glitter bomb package thief on you tube. Quite funny.
"Dark Stains on the Wall":
Old Oriental novel
Author: Hu Flung Dung
by Poetic School of Darth
One monkey throws poo.
This is the way things should be.
Two is a shit storm.
by Dead Wife, killed for drinking all of the beer and not going to the store for more.
You, Haiku poet !
Receive your wife's dead body
from Tsing-Tao beer vat.
by Auspicious Portents of Jade Mountain Goddess
How was your wife, hon?
Oh, a beer to hear I'm that.
I'll get you sorry .
by Wise Maiden of of Scarlet Robe of Tsing-Tao Brewery
Paper tigers all!
Wrong thinking of Old-Way mind.
(more Hennessy, mom)
by Gang of Four Aces of Dialectical Materialism applied to Haiku
How was your sorry, hon?
Oh, I'm that hear today.
I'll get you a wife.
by Good Beer !
sarah jeong ill-sung:
no seoul dim sum in a-hole
pyongyang yin poontang
by Carl Jeong of Old Vienna mit Kaffe-klatsch
How was your day, hon?
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
I'll get you a beer.
by Good wife.
Better time wasted
Examining your gonads
Big warts and all
by Doc
So Darwinian
Similarly simian
Abyssinian
by Haile Selassie of Detroit
Hair named Donald Trump.
He make me get furious.
Him bad president.
by Hair Apparent of Appalling Orange
Lucy was an ape
Not a proto-humanoid.
Sorry, Donald J.
by Omo Afar of Turkana Banana
Bleaching straightened hair
Qualifies as cultural
Appropriation
by Great Mother Africa of Lapp-land
"Rat" is a mob term,
used for one who tells the truth
So yeah, Trump is right.
by Hahahahaha
Holiday Shopping
I'm buying you some more junk
Don't expect blow jobs
by Shopper
Peaceful unicorn
Licking luscious lollipops
Farting rainbow dust
by Yasmine of Fla.
Stink weed in bloom
Growing out of your anus
You call it your head
by Anonymous Poet
From my shit you grow.
Fertilized words of anger.
Sprouting with hatred.
My words poured on you.
Polluted rain mutating.
See what you've become.
by Anonymous Poet
This tray of cookies
I'll just leave outside your door
Shh...iced with Jizzum
by Elf of Shelf
Sandy Hook ghosties
Hanging with Mr. Rosen
Where's the fire station?
by Nun with Tremondous feet and schlong
Christmas is cancelled
Santa Claus has a boner
Now that's a North Pole
by Mrs. Claus of Bedroom
North Pole telegram:
No presents. Just turds this year.
Some have corn kernels
by Santa of North Pole
Stuff the Christmas Cunt
Stockings? Fugheddaboddit.
Tidings of tuna
by Holly of Halls
Wooden drummer boy
Paradiddle diddle dong
Geppetophile Song
by Creep
Live Nativity
Copulating donkeys bray
Redolent dung piles
by Soylent Knight of On the scene
Sitting on the can
Making loud sucking noises
Care for a a Werther's?
by Dirty Old Man of Can
Kim Il Sung send out
Most glad tiding of Christmas
From happy Pyongyang
by Benevolent All-Wise Leader of People's Proletarian Vanguard
Angelic voices:
The celestial choirs of God.
Darth responds. More shit.
by No escape now. Christmas songs of glorious Gospel surround you
Just call me Stink Floyd
Another brick in the wall
Shit them out for free
Feed me tacos, beans
Free building materials
Great Wall of Feces
Tourist attraction
My dung bricks will attract flies
Call me Frank Lloyd Wrong
by Patent holder for Fecal Concrete of Brick Shithouse
