Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 352 Days and 77336 Haiku later...

God hates us I know.
Cows don't make chocolate milk.
Mosquitoes exist.
Haiku # 60221, October 15, 2018 8:43 pm ET
by DARTH FIGPUCKER
well leave them leaves a
bit alone they end up on
the neighbor's yard way
Haiku # 60220, October 15, 2018 6:35 pm ET
by vhs
Lazy and ice cold
I just want to be the first
To climb Mt. Haikuji
Haiku # 60219, October 15, 2018 2:58 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Witchy Autumn Spell
Wind blow leaves to neighbor's yard
Can't rake them. Too hard.
Haiku # 60218, October 15, 2018 2:06 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
recipe for love
A bottomless cup of coffee
Topless barista
Haiku # 60217, October 15, 2018 1:59 pm ET
by Black Coffee of In bed
Standing in line now
Free samples of the worms day
Fly out your way soon
Haiku # 60216, October 15, 2018 12:34 pm ET
by Robin of Your yard
*Fertilized.
Haiku # 60215, October 15, 2018 10:29 am ET
by Christ, I suck.
*EasterBated
Haiku # 60214, October 15, 2018 10:28 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Chocolate Jesus.
This is My Body and Blood.
Cream filled, bite the head.

Eaterbated Peeps.
Fertiled eggs will soon hatch
a Devilish plan.
Haiku # 60213, October 15, 2018 5:01 am ET
by Fat Drug Her Pick
And finally, this
Wind is blowing my mind off
The thing it sits on
Haiku # 60212, October 15, 2018 2:41 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Carrying my phone
Looking cool as fuck all, eh?
Watch me talk on it
Haiku # 60211, October 15, 2018 2:38 am ET
by Cool
Writing my poem
About the new haiku smell
Feeling so lucky
Haiku # 60210, October 15, 2018 2:36 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Forecast calls for wind
Blowing straight out of your junk
And out the back end

Tie down the whole street
Seek out cover and good coffee
Wait out this weather
Haiku # 60209, October 15, 2018 2:34 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Hair conditioner
We know what you do with it
So, stop it right now
Haiku # 60208, October 15, 2018 2:29 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Delicatessen
Genoa hard salami?
Comes with own mayo
Haiku # 60207, October 15, 2018 1:44 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
priesthood and boners
The only problem with this
Hiding salami
Haiku # 60206, October 15, 2018 1:39 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Birdsong of the wind
Lullaby of the fat worms
Asleep in the nest
Haiku # 60205, October 15, 2018 1:30 am ET
by Happy Baby Bird of Nest
Delicate crane's eggs
Tickled by fluttering wind
Humping fan on low
Haiku # 60204, October 15, 2018 1:25 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Multitasking rules!
Masturbate to poetry.
Kill two birds, you know.
Haiku # 60203, October 15, 2018 1:19 am ET
by DARTH FIGPUCKER
Danced with my old friend
Tornado Toes ( he's a ghost)
Hit him up some time
Haiku # 60202, October 15, 2018 1:11 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Penis size the same
Lookalike of the sandworms
Protein shakes for all
Haiku # 60201, October 15, 2018 1:09 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Erection distract
Practice Haiku discipline
Leave ding dong alone
Haiku # 60200, October 15, 2018 1:06 am ET
by Advice
Who needs an erection
With all this poetry
To look forward to
Haiku # 60199, October 15, 2018 1:01 am ET
by Simpleton of 17 syllables and a microphone
What I was thinking
The wind was just letting go
Breathing on your head
Haiku # 60198, October 15, 2018 12:57 am ET
by Where's your hat?
Smoking in the dark
In bed listening to grunge
Burned my limp dick
Haiku # 60197, October 15, 2018 12:48 am ET
by Damn frustrated
The wind blew and extinguished
A burning lamp's wick
That's why it's so smoky in here
Remembering Nirvana
Haiku # 60196, October 15, 2018 12:45 am ET
by Simpleton
I take more showers than necessary
Because the last time I was happy
I was taking a shower
Attempting to recreate contentment
Haiku # 60195, October 15, 2018 12:40 am ET
by Simpleton of it feels like a long time ago
Deglazing the pot
White porcelain bowl. Hot stew
Martha Stewart shits
Haiku # 60194, October 15, 2018 12:29 am ET
by Martha and 400 assistants of Connecticut
Working hard scrub floor
Show you my big bento box
Join me for lunch, yes?
Haiku # 60193, October 14, 2018 10:18 pm ET
by Kit
Extra large popcorn
Hole cut out of the bottom
Yeah, that's him right there
Haiku # 60192, October 14, 2018 9:54 pm ET
by Theatre goer
The Japanese like
sordid carnal nastiness.
Look at anime!
Haiku # 60191, October 14, 2018 9:40 pm ET
by MyToyota MushySushi
guess what...i
f~posted from my tv
fracking sweet remote
Haiku # 60190, October 14, 2018 9:32 pm ET
by j bot
submissive haiku?
if im dominant then what
BDSMku
Haiku # 60189, October 14, 2018 9:27 pm ET
by j bot
**Imploding "HEAD meat"

Not "Heat meat".

Honestly.... can't type.
Haiku # 60188, October 14, 2018 8:42 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Gay millenials
have a problem with dairy,
yet eat their own "cheese".
Haiku # 60187, October 14, 2018 8:26 pm ET
by DARTH FIGPUCKER
Burn in Hell Haiku:
vapid, superficial verse.
Go home to Japan!
Haiku # 60186, October 14, 2018 8:12 pm ET
by eat my words of wisdom
Please: more verse about
sordid carnal nastiness.
THAT'S real Haiku (not)
Haiku # 60185, October 14, 2018 8:09 pm ET
by Sick of your stench and tired of this site
He's mocking me!
I'm mocking myself under a pseudo pseudonym and I won't stop!
He's craving equations. I must feed him!
Bye bye the by and by for now, I'll thank the cow
for the cheese, and next time say please.
Haiku # 60184, October 14, 2018 8:05 pm ET
by Pig Fart Her Duck
Imploding heat meat.
Vacuum pump in rump to brain.
B4 you're insane!
Haiku # 60183, October 14, 2018 7:55 pm ET
by But her buttered butt, err...
Dead prostitutes, cough,
Poems, fat old mosquitoes,
Rancid moldy cheese.
Haiku # 60182, October 14, 2018 7:51 pm ET
by But her fly is stuck
Exploding ass meat.
Roast rump nitroglycerine.
C4 long pig ham.
Haiku # 60181, October 14, 2018 7:43 pm ET
by DARTH FIGPUCKER
Enslave all Earth's beasts
for my spoiled dairy feast.
I know no karma.

I need no dharma
Dolly llama cheeese, so pass
the crackers, honky.

And I'll pass the gass.
Proverbial cut the cheese.
Limburger blasting.

Limburger is just
really funky brie, you see.
What God made cows for.
Haiku # 60180, October 14, 2018 7:39 pm ET
by DARTH FIGPUCKER
Dead mosquitoes, cheese,
coffee, cute young prostitutes,
and bad poetry.
Haiku # 60179, October 14, 2018 7:28 pm ET
by But her butterfly tattooed ass in the air
Vegan Pacino
Heaps of Parma! Good Karma!
Made with walnuts, yeast
Haiku # 60178, October 14, 2018 7:24 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Baked in your pie hole
Four and twenty blackbirds
Singing. Dead of night
Haiku # 60177, October 14, 2018 7:22 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Injecting goat cheese.
Smoked Gouda Buddha bong hits.
Snorting Parmesan.

I fucking love cheese.
Cholesterol filled downfall.
Delicious descent.

Worth the heart attacks.
Worth the hardened arteries.
Red wine cracker friends.
Haiku # 60176, October 14, 2018 7:20 pm ET
by DARTH FIGPUCKER of Rape the vegan nuns on the alters of C'thulu.
Cross Country Convoy
Cathetered cock constant cruise
Canned cuisine cooking
Haiku # 60175, October 14, 2018 7:19 pm ET
by Mack
Pies' fart greaseless then
Remembered outside my hole
Ass blows shameful kiss
Haiku # 60174, October 14, 2018 7:11 pm ET
by But her fly is undone
Sunday Communion
Vegan Parmesan sprinkle
Priest, Try stopping me
Haiku # 60173, October 14, 2018 7:03 pm ET
by Starkitten of Cataholic Church
Changes repeating
Me commanding door open
Fortune of hustle
Haiku # 60172, October 14, 2018 7:00 pm ET
by But her fly is unzipped
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