Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 64 Days and 78028 Haiku later...
I want to quit life.
Not to die, just quit life.
Live under a bridge.

Jump out at children.
"Delicious meat! Juicy sweet!"
Wearing troll costume.

Farting in public.
Talking to people not there.
Collecting boogers.
Haiku # 58861 August 20, 2018 11:53 pm ET
by
so they wanna cut
alex jones out of the scene...
marxist lesbians...

need a slap across the face
Haiku # 58860 August 20, 2018 10:05 pm ET
by vhs
so some pissy black
clad gangs want to replace the
states with marxism

lesbianism...
take that spiral dance and tell
starhawk, fly off...broom...
Haiku # 58859 August 20, 2018 10:03 pm ET
by vhs of ...broom broom!
so youve read our ol'
pastor of intimidation
fighting here now
Haiku # 58858 August 20, 2018 10:01 pm ET
by vhs of john bevere joins the literary meme category?
and of fucking course
i had to find my kurt cobain
book...here we are now...
Haiku # 58857 August 20, 2018 9:59 pm ET
by vhs
Funyuns. Smokes. Cheap Beer.
Midnight ride of John Bevere.
Satan Bait sold here
Haiku # 58856 August 20, 2018 5:51 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest of Dung Heap grade flyswatters
Take Seattle Slew
You win some.You lose a few.
Just don't become glue.
Haiku # 58855 August 20, 2018 5:42 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Haiku Whisperer and Neighsayer
Sir if I were you
Standing in that muddy slough
Crank out some Bad Haiku!
Haiku # 58854 August 20, 2018 5:33 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
if i give up on folks
because of an offense then
God gives up on me
Haiku # 58853 August 20, 2018 12:58 pm ET
by vhs of the spirit of offense....john bevere
the whole quest of the
book Pilgrim's Progress is the
sidetracks to the one

city on the hill, that
is the goal...is the the slough
of despond I'm in?
Haiku # 58852 August 20, 2018 11:37 am ET
by vhs
the urge to retreat
and sit back and turn off the
world is a strong urge
Haiku # 58851 August 20, 2018 10:47 am ET
by vhs
i get the urge to
quit on line forums and let
people be, quitting

long term "projects" to
go within, giving up on
people as not

reliable at all
Haiku # 58850 August 20, 2018 10:21 am ET
by vhs
You look just like him
And I'm Mary Tyler Moore.
Pop goes the Weezer!
Haiku # 58849 August 19, 2018 8:15 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Bad Haiku. So Quiet.
You can hear chirping crickets
And Buddy Holly, too.
Haiku # 58848 August 19, 2018 8:05 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Room Clearing Service Ltd.
Then came the Spring thaw
Sorest ass I ever saw.
Seen my thesaurus?
Haiku # 58847 August 19, 2018 11:53 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Save the trees, wipe your ass with an owl!
Wintertime. Kinda hard.
Wiping with a Christmas card.
Got figgy pudding?
Haiku # 58846 August 19, 2018 11:47 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Wiped his bum with leaves
Or while bringing in the sheaves.
Behold, Thoreausoreass
Haiku # 58845 August 19, 2018 11:39 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
A pot to piss in
When Henry David Thoreau
Really had to go
Haiku # 58844 August 19, 2018 11:28 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Transcendental Urination Quality Control
honestly im in
my go to walden mood, do
not pass go, leave here
Haiku # 58843 August 19, 2018 9:03 am ET
by vhs
are you knowing the
more you keep going i will
energizer, too?
Haiku # 58842 August 19, 2018 9:02 am ET
by vhs
Wake up, vhs!
How the Hell are you doing?
Fresh haiku brewing
Haiku # 58841 August 19, 2018 3:03 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Eat Alphabet Soup
And every day you will poop
Bestsellers to read!
Haiku # 58840 August 19, 2018 12:41 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Get into the groove
Got to make your bowels move,
Hey, Poop to the beat.
Haiku # 58839 August 19, 2018 12:23 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
I'm not feeling the
groove, introvert comes out must
sleep till the end times
Haiku # 58838 August 18, 2018 10:27 pm ET
by vhs
i heard a man went
nuts long ago who sold books
I'm glad i didn't buy

books from that guy and
i got away from that guy as quick
as i could do so
Haiku # 58837 August 18, 2018 10:25 pm ET
by vhs
i get stone temple pilots
and social justice warriors
mixed up sometimes, maybe
a band called social justice
warriors needs to come out and
put the so called justice warriors
to get offended and then egg them on when their attempts at intimidation cease to work, the doxxing, the shaming, look in the mirror they see blue hair
Haiku # 58836 August 18, 2018 10:00 pm ET
by vhs
I've officially lost it
stupid bitch in a cafe got
all wound up when i said
I voted for trump and the lady said no i can't take it then i walked down the street wondering if that old boomer
geezer wondered if i should off myself over it and would ever think because of that convo i began to not value my own life
Haiku # 58835 August 18, 2018 9:58 pm ET
by vhs
and for fuck sakes if
donald trump turns water into wine
and these drugged out hippie-o-crits
start burning the flag, claiming they hate america...well for fuck sakes when these assholes actually
experience world war three or some other horrid event, they'll be crying for real rather than the retarded mock crying of xanax
let them have their own "cannibalism" by eating themselves
Haiku # 58834 August 18, 2018 9:56 pm ET
by vhs
so if i get these
paranoid hints in my mind whilst
real life is jabbering around me
clueless to what i do on line
and i get irritated with the real life drama of vanilla people whilst dealing with "thrilling" people on line, which fucking
one am i escaping from?
Haiku # 58833 August 18, 2018 9:52 pm ET
by vhs
man i just get tired of this
stuff when i think it might
affect me in real life
and threaten the ones i love
because i think the person on
the other end might really be nuts
Haiku # 58832 August 18, 2018 9:51 pm ET
by vhs
Try our Phish and Chips
We only have one waitress
Fast enough for you?
Haiku # 58831 August 18, 2018 8:32 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Piping hot for you...
John, Paul, George, and Ringo too
Splendid Beatle Stew!
Haiku # 58830 August 18, 2018 8:12 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Cultures that can claim
exquisite culinary
delights piss me off.
Haiku # 58829 August 18, 2018 8:06 pm ET
by How dare they?!?! of Not in Trump-land.
Grasshoppers taste good.
Scorpions have a nice crunch.
Tarantulas... Nope!
Haiku # 58828 August 18, 2018 7:58 pm ET
by df
Ok, Just got here
Please tell me where to park my
Big pink bathysphere
Haiku # 58827 August 18, 2018 7:39 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
I don't do windows.
I'll wear a smile, nothing more
Knock, Knock, on your door
Haiku # 58826 August 18, 2018 6:49 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Blood spills with rigor
Quiet noise emerged at last
Fall reaching nothing
Haiku # 58825 August 18, 2018 6:27 pm ET
by [redacted]
come to my window
im not a lesbian but
i'll be home soon...i'll..
Haiku # 58824 August 18, 2018 5:30 pm ET
by vhs
Lay down on my couch
The Libido's cathexis
Bad haiku connects us
Haiku # 58823 August 18, 2018 12:19 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Psychological Services PH.D
hmm anima and
animus our enema
letting it all out
Haiku # 58822 August 18, 2018 9:03 am ET
by vhs of freud would shit, jung would write another red book
Do fish get boners?
Quick, Hop in my bathysphere
Please wear something sheer.
Haiku # 58821 August 18, 2018 8:24 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Let's ask Jacques Cousteau
Please give his shell phone a blow
Perhaps he would know
Haiku # 58820 August 18, 2018 7:25 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest smoking legal seaweed
When dolphins beat off
do they spank their sea monkeys?
Asking for a friend.
Haiku # 58819 August 18, 2018 4:44 am ET
by just kidding, I have no freinds.
I ate four cans of
alphabet soup and had a
huge vowel movement.
Haiku # 58818 August 18, 2018 4:41 am ET
by df
No wagering, folks.
LIVE: Simon and Garfunkel
Cage Fight to the Death!
Haiku # 58817 August 18, 2018 1:18 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
Tale of Two Shitties
Eat Alphabet Soup daily
Poop out a novel
Haiku # 58816 August 18, 2018 12:34 am ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
ive heard of eating
my heart out but this is all
rediculous soup
Haiku # 58815 August 17, 2018 11:00 pm ET
by vhs
Copenhagen Chew
Wash it down with Human Stew
That tastes just like you

The
Haiku # 58814 August 17, 2018 9:40 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
i wonder what kind
of milkshake you make to bring
kaiju to the yard

you could teach me but
you'd have to charge
Haiku # 58813 August 17, 2018 8:05 pm ET
by vhs
Catch a Lake Monster
A sprinkle of my Phish Food
Brings Champ to the yard
Haiku # 58812 August 17, 2018 6:45 pm ET
by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest
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