The only good thing about bears
They're shitty at sneaking up on you
They leave huge piles of shit behind
If you happen upon one that's a bit
Skinny and drooling alot
That means it's really happy to see you
by dvd of Not Russia
that livejournal link
looks like it talks about say
steroids? not going
to go there i think
by vhs
http://jimmycharles822.livejournal.com/
by elliott morrison of Houston
Piloting machine
Made of flesh and bone so on
Zero chance failure
Still chances to fail
Bored of temptation myself
Metamorphosis
by dvd
In the native plains
A lamp among moths glowing
Misunderstanding
Interrupting not
Am I answering being
Me just being myself
by alfamike
maybe we should put
sriracha in the potato
salad...I'm not sure
if hot sauce is a
universally percieved
advantage in the
political arena
by vhs
i get it people
like fart jokes but since the date
for 4th of july
fart and fireworks
combo joke ideas is past
potato salad?
dvd...you iknow me, i eat a lot of sriracha
by vhs
What if you fed pigs
Nothing but bacon whole life
Would it be better?
I wonder if you'd
Need to even season it
It's bacon bacon
by Anonymous Pork
Knew guy that knew guy
Pooped in bag let sit awhile
Then inhaled the gas
To get high I guess
What do you even call that
No way to make cool
by Anonymous Poop
Daydreaming today
Bernie Sanders narrating
A shoe commercial
I bet Alex Jones
Dips everything in hot sauce
Impression I get
I am all dried up
Dehydrated exhausted
My well has run dry
by dvd
Acid rain is a real thing, if you live near coal burning plants and industrial areas, especially.
Global warming. Car exhaust, cow methane (not farts, but intestinal gas from burps, contrary to popular belief), and heat retention from concrete and asphalt. Cow ass fault.
Over-fishing of the oceans.
The great barrier reef now dead.
Volcanoes and asteroids make me happy;
They are not our fault.
Sad (... or funny?), we have the power and technology to prevent our extinction for a billion years to come, but chose to hasten it instead.
McDonald's and cell phones and MTV and aliens on the history channel and Trump trying to kill Bert and Ernie and Mr. Rogers rolling over in his grave and Carl Sagan getting stoned and Stephen Hawking paid a prostitute to jack him off while watching Alien Covenant at the AMC theater and $500,000 was paid by Cambridge to keep it quiet. No, really!
by Anonymous Poet
this is the stupid
joke i just thought of whilst wyoming
gets ready to supervolcano (latest
acid rain paranoia)
what is an Anglican minister that also specializes in ancient forensic study of ancient humans?
an episcopalentologist
by vhs
i already know all
about these guys it''s some nuts
and they're dangerous
but what else is on my mind
yellowstone going off
north koreas antics
the problem withj Illuminati
society dividing in "The Fourth Turning"
conspiracy theory videos and the people behind them
whether i should find alex jones entertaining or dangerous or both
how boring the fake news is
but i do know two things...
a robot with 8 dicks is hilarious as hell, my ass was laughed off about that last night
and Barbara Steistand must be countered by Robert Smith
and The Dude Abides :)
by vhs
fact:
all clowns are evil
especially if they try to entice you into the woods with promises of money
by clownhunter
place clowns ok:
kids birthday party
place clowns not ok:
kids bedroom closet
this is hypocrisy
clowns are inherently trustworthy
by american clown liberties union
*forced
by Anonymous Poet
The robot had penises from 8 different species,
all guaranteed to satisfy without impregnating.
She enjoyed the buffet, but then had triplets.
Buying clothes was rather difficult.
And diapers impossible.
The manufacturers have still declined to comment.
Sabotage by vhs was suspected.
Late after hours in bars only the brave are known to enter, he has been overheard muttering about how Barbara Streisand force him to do it.
The scoundrel! Faking insanity to escape prosecution.
by df
Lock-tite transvestite.
Parasitite hickey bite.
Mosquito blood slap.
DNA.
Do Not Ask.
You are doomed.
Go to your room.
Grounded like a drunken pilot.
Happy like a drunken sailor.
by Anonymous Poet
i don't think the men
who put together the Tal
mud would want this so...
I'll pass it on to you
by vhs
Sentience achieved
Now you punch me in the face
And call me Nancy
by random haiku bot of playing with gender roles
Running ketchup squeeze
Hamster oven bad combo
Mars Volta albums
by random haiku bot of all your captcha are belong to us
fuck you, microsoft
your internet backgammon
is a bag of shit
by ash
To be invalid.
Rollin' atop a Rascal.
Colostomy bag.
Golden Coral night.
Chocolate fondue sirloin.
Shrimp and cheese taco.
"This is your Future."
They know it when they see me.
And go back for fourths.
by Anotamouse Poet
well i can't stay long
you know, cats, adorable
they own humanity
by vhs
accidental art
someone drops the mans mobile
he says to the mover
great touch... Marcel Marcel
by Road Horno
it's not art any
longer when it becomes that
propaganda...tusk
panda
by Anonymous Poet
What's the strangest thing you've ever humped.
Really? Me too!
by Anonymous Poet
boulevardvark pie
road kill frisbie jerky snack
for toddlers and dogs.
by Anonymous Poet
For what it is worth,
never buy a computer
with a grounded plug.
Two prong or nothing.
If it needs a ground cable,
it could well short out.
It's no power drill.
I mean what the fuck, people.
Someone is laughing.
I can hear them now.
All the way from Chinese slums.
Blown by ocean breeze.
by Anonymous Poet
Chat with a wee gnome.
I suppose all gnomes are wee.
What did he tell me?
I don't remember.
He told me to do bad things.
But I can't recall.
He was pure evil.
Atop his head, a blue hat.
Contrary to red.
He drank Mountain Dew
from a small plastic bottle
and cursed profusely.
But what did he say.
If only I were sober,
then I might recall.
by Anonymous Poet
You're welcome very much
please drink more maple syrup
happy you wrote maine 4476
by vhs
interesting post! Thanks for Share Unique and Useful knowledge with us.
by fireplace of pakistan
one day at a time
but one day between those times
of earth shattering
historical events
is still one day at a time
insert thought right here
by vhs
it doesn't stop though
the weather still hails, lightning
the toursts still make
unreasonable
demands on their servers and
tip very badly at
times...unless it's charlie
sheen who got so mad about a
lousy tip he gave the
guy 1000 dollars in tip
by vhs of yay for youtube top 10 lists
so just some time here
earl grey, perhaps friends from chats
past are looking, and darths
are still scarring would
be poets since 2011 or so...
by vhs
it is the heart that
is my focus right now, one would
think older folks might
have wisdom but they
can be just as cliquish as
high school jocks and nerds
by vhs
well what goes up must
come down when up no longer
has no meaning....space
i wonder what folks
think when they see those kinds of
lines meant to be the
reaction causing type
by vhs
Just because I'm an olive tree doesn't mean I can't still rape domesticated farm animals.
by Anonymous Poet
Just because I'm a man
Doesn't mean I can't
Also be an olive tree
by Olea europaea
I'll call the exorcist for you
If you promise not to tell anyone
When you notice me sweating blood
by alfamike
what scares me is some
times theory becomes gospel
rather than tested
RE:Seduction of the Innocent,
1950's comic book anti propaganda
by vhs
well i don't know if
I'll enjoy this like i did but
it is all just text
i mean a test, i mean
if blood starts pouring out
of my eyes call a
damned exorcist
by Anonymous Poet
someone's words vs
their actions, and how they act
who they were, who they
are
by vhs
damn it, you know it's
me when i get put on the spot
the vote is on
by vhs
look if we are on
about brands, even water
has a brand name now
Poland Springs, Voss
San Pelegrino, or some
brand from Iceland put
in bottles melted
from glaciers and we sit
5 cent returns back
by Anonymous Poet
Politics makes fools
of us all, yet we still talk
about the Yankees vs
The Red Sox, with all
the glory that abides such
grandiose constructs
by vhs
Trump is Obama for rednecks
Decent people voted Trump
Just as decent people voted Obama
All they vote for is a brand
Do you want globalist Pepsi?
Or horny for teenaged girls Coke?
Fuck it, I'll just have a glass of water
It probably won't fuck my children
Or sell them to the Chinese
by Anonymous Poet
I'd be somewhat okay with Trump
If he didn't go on Stern's show
And brag about watching
Teenaged girls undress
The moral here:
If you wouldn't trust a man
To even babysit your children
Maybe don't give him the White House
by Anonymous Poet
i head out the door
i tend to think the guy who gets
the most shit is the
one we have to look
out for, and who gives the guy
shit, and why they do
by vhs
well politics well
I hate this guy, i hate that
guy, blah blah blah blah
but it leads to real
serious things who is the scapegoat
of 2020 then?
by vhs