Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 40 Days and 77431 Haiku later...

the folks reading these
words, as i read some i read
with absolute horror

the doors to R'yleh
have broken open and the
Beast is out in wrath

but evil's time is short
Haiku # 56722, June 5, 2017 11:04 am ET
by vhs
it's whining they say
and the votes quietly come in
and push those folks out

that want to divide
kathy is out, tours cancelled
let's see barns go up

libraries get funded
let's learn a tack from the Amish
and get it together

or weird al will do a parody video of all this stuff in our mad world
Haiku # 56721, June 5, 2017 11:00 am ET
by vhs
i mean summer folks
coming out and the narcissism
the anger, the just

blind selfish focus
that overshadows the good in
any and all things, when

the good comes out that
break in the clouds that sense we
forgot our tribal

instincts to Thomas Hobbes
and woke up to a bigger picture
of a less tribal tribe

we are what we believe
Haiku # 56720, June 5, 2017 10:58 am ET
by vhs
i was speaking to
a nice young man going to
law enforcement and

only if the art and
english students had that role
model of someone who

gave them confidence
in the creative world, cause
some professors don't

get it because they
forget they are there for their
students, but some do

remember, and they
tend to remember their
service to their charges

and to instill a
sense of guidance, obi wan
and not darth sidious
Haiku # 56719, June 5, 2017 10:56 am ET
by vhs
and the example
of the baby boom going bust
well we are picking

on each other in
a time of great need to get
that whatever is

still human about
us and i hate to say it
being the libertarian

i am, get our hoods
back together, and i mean neigh
borhoods, the acts of

getting it together
i don't know what to do but
whatever you're advocating

in frustration is sure as hell not it
Haiku # 56718, June 5, 2017 10:53 am ET
by vhs
this world we live in
has a lot of bad things in it
some of them are made

up by people to
explain away a world gone
crazy, the end times some

say, so people go
post weird stuff on youtube and
alex jones gets loud

more ghost stuff, more pro
and polarized stuff and it
all falls down, the game

ashes to ashes
we all fall down
Haiku # 56717, June 5, 2017 10:50 am ET
by vhs
i dont play yasuo
yasuo is the most cancer
i dont have cancer
Haiku # 56716, June 5, 2017 3:45 am ET
by league of legends of summoners rift
No luck. Negative.
Fucking bloody hem-horrid.
Why the fuck do Asians always take selfies like every five fucking minutes??? Christ, it's annoying. Everything they eat, everything they buy or wear..... FUCK! I want to slap the narcissism out of their cell phone addicted faces.
I'm sorry... what were we talking about?
Haiku # 56715, June 5, 2017 2:54 am ET
by df
chemo was the bomb
till immunotherapy
lined up a clear shot

https://aeon.co/essays/why-are-people-still-dying-of-cancer
Haiku # 56714, June 5, 2017 12:40 am ET
by ash
daesh brotherhood
the charles manson family
relative madness ?
Haiku # 56713, June 5, 2017 12:30 am ET
by ash
adam ben adam
you can wear your foil beanie
but i'm living proof
Haiku # 56712, June 5, 2017 12:26 am ET
by ash
I remember the good old days when close friends went on suicidal killing sprees just for the fun of it.
Now it has to mean something.
Fucking terrorists.
Can't we put religion and politics and money aside and just kill each other for sport and good times like back in the 90's?
Haiku # 56711, June 4, 2017 9:36 pm ET
by df of At the urologists pricing a penis enlargement
"but that's not a haiku"
"well I'm working on it right now"
"how many does it take???"

"Well till i go to work"
"what about last minute rush?"
"that's tomorrows haiku"

"this really is bad"
"you do realize you are talking
to yourself right now"
Haiku # 56710, June 4, 2017 2:47 pm ET
by vhs
this site is from a
time when things seemed a bit wild
and the Net was the

shizznit, but now it
is the thing that really is
central to this life

information and commerce
social contacts, wikis, chats
and emails for starts
Haiku # 56709, June 4, 2017 2:44 pm ET
by vhs
so much for books, I've
found the RationalWiki
which has rational

things in it but when
the power goes down, i can
still watch the crows fly
Haiku # 56708, June 4, 2017 2:11 pm ET
by vhs
and it will be on
the television news once
or twice, violence

a thing over there
till it is in one's space, one's face
how does it end?
Haiku # 56707, June 4, 2017 2:08 pm ET
by vhs
having had many
relatives pass from cancer
it will kill you, but

sometimes people live
with it and sometimes it goes
away. some of us

want to relive youth
the giant party when all
was possible, it

has no words sometimes
when this sort of thing prevails
Haiku # 56706, June 4, 2017 2:01 pm ET
by vhs
Cancer cells die when absorbing
Microscopic diamond
Healthy cells are fine
Most common use for cancer cure:
Trash bags
Human priorities
Haiku # 56705, June 4, 2017 10:43 am ET
by adam ben adam
my experience ?
cancer is not a battle
it's misunderstood

part of your being
believes itself immortal
but it's delusion

lacking self control
and going exponential
it seals its own fate

the metastasis
of first world aspirations
is a metaphor
Haiku # 56704, June 4, 2017 1:13 am ET
by ash
deluded zealots
if your god wants people dead
waiting will do it
Haiku # 56703, June 4, 2017 12:55 am ET
by ash
I took research drugs.
I had one digit IQ.
Go ask Tim Leary.
Haiku # 56702, June 4, 2017 12:43 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Results back Monday.
I pray that I have cancer.
What fun I'd then have!

Whoring and drinking.
All kinds of illegal drugs.
Oh, but that's not all.

I think the best part
would be seeing my wife's face
when she hears my plans.

At least she'd hate me.
And therefore wouldn't miss me.
It would be worth it.
Haiku # 56701, June 4, 2017 12:40 am ET
by df
Will the wind ever remember
The names it has blown in the past?
And with his crutch, its old age, and its wisdom
It whispers no, this will be the last

And the wind cries "Covfefe"
Haiku # 56700, June 3, 2017 9:45 pm ET
by Donald Hendrix
Ever heard of Limitless?
Man takes research chemical
Gets 4 digit IQ
Playing my clarinet
Haiku # 56699, June 3, 2017 7:53 pm ET
by Squidward Morra
Everything I touch falls apart
Probably because I have scissors for hands
Playing my clarinet
Haiku # 56698, June 3, 2017 7:45 pm ET
by Squidward Scissorhands
GOOGLE SEARCH:
How to use Google?
There are actually instructions
Public Service Announcement
Brought to you by
The Federal Department of Redundancy Department Federation
Haiku # 56697, June 3, 2017 3:46 pm ET
by Federal Department of Redundancy Department Federation Employee of Federal Department of Redundancy Department Federation Office
Music is in us
Holographic paradox
We are in music
Haiku # 56696, June 3, 2017 3:39 pm ET
by adam ben adam
Something-Something-Gate
Trump asked Russia to hack DNC
On live television
Huh, who dunnit?
Haiku # 56695, June 3, 2017 3:36 pm ET
by Squidward and Bernstein
We're all underwater
We're all under surveillance
Playing my clarinet
Haiku # 56694, June 3, 2017 3:34 pm ET
by Squidward Snowden
My grandfather sold art
He would shoot a tree and sell a piece
To rich tourists
Claiming it was from the 1700's
Haiku # 56693, June 3, 2017 3:33 pm ET
by dvd
the problem with "art"
is some art which is modern
is kinda cool and

kinda a con job
and some of it is meant to
shock. it all started

with dadaism and went
from there, it can be fun
but art people can

be kinda mean too
Haiku # 56692, June 3, 2017 2:44 pm ET
by vhs
speaking of marketing
maybe sears or jcpennies
would still be around

if they had still made
the catalogue, not quite
uncle henry's swap and sell

of course but it would
and might keep the malls up
for some time now
Haiku # 56691, June 3, 2017 2:27 pm ET
by vhs
oh um Ben Adam??
Filafat's a friend too, he
does and loves music
Haiku # 56690, June 3, 2017 2:13 pm ET
by vhs
listen to Webern
his music is like haiku
pay close attention
Haiku # 56689, June 3, 2017 2:05 pm ET
by filflat of hell
Kathy Griffin does ISIS photo shoot
I'm not impressed with their marketing
Strategy
Haiku # 56688, June 3, 2017 1:48 pm ET
by dvd
if the ship is on
the way down if some nut thinks
he can walk on the

water then he thinks
or she thinks despite the odds
they can walk right on
Haiku # 56687, June 3, 2017 1:29 pm ET
by vhs of
what does it all mean ?
the irony of our lives
is that it's all mean
Haiku # 56686, June 3, 2017 9:42 am ET
by ash
alternative fact :
the elephant in the room
is called covfefe
Haiku # 56685, June 3, 2017 9:34 am ET
by ash
Will we remember
what happened while we stood by
watching it melt down?
Haiku # 56684, June 3, 2017 3:08 am ET
by Mandingo Ebola of Rats on a sinking ship
Shegondaploo zkling
Fake secret codes a'lamode
Touch my special parts
Haiku # 56683, June 3, 2017 1:24 am ET
by Mandingo Ebola of Britebart War Room
Some days I want to strip completely naked and scream in the shopping mall:
"I AM DARTH FIGPUCKER!!!" as my wife and children look on in horror as their "provider" has snapped and gone over the edge of sanity.
I would enjoy the meds, I think.
... and throwing my poo. That would be fun too.
Losing one type of freedom to gain another. Uncle Charlie Manson knows.
Haiku # 56682, June 2, 2017 10:19 pm ET
by df
I should be nicer
Not an easy thing to do
But still, I will try.
Haiku # 56681, June 2, 2017 10:12 pm ET
by T
i'm hoping of course
Shima Luan who used to
be on a Youtube

channel called Planet
Dolan with a snarky Aussie
named, Dolan, quit

but she is now back
hope she's ok, no hackers
she quit but had her

reasons, and I'm here
talking about Planet Dolan
and one of the voice

actors on it
Haiku # 56680, June 2, 2017 9:10 pm ET
by vhs
oh yes...something some-
thing pearls before something some
thing, swine something and

i thought stewie as
Darth Vader was a bit of
a paradox, or

Dark Helmet was a
bit of a jest too, i don't
know what rick does now
Haiku # 56679, June 2, 2017 8:18 pm ET
by vhs
concerning those folks
who made a career out of
impersonations

the late rich little
was one who often poked fun
at his fellow folks

who had a bit of
fame in their day, to be thus
remembered and punked
Haiku # 56678, June 2, 2017 8:16 pm ET
by vhs
Old coder joke
There are no bugs
They're just "features"
Haiku # 56677, June 2, 2017 3:50 pm ET
by fuse
Dead moths make me sad
Never meant to hurt them all
Accidents happen
Haiku # 56676, June 2, 2017 2:26 pm ET
by fuse
Aaaand now I need to download
Scribe
Sample of Thermodynamic Moronic
Had me laughing at equations
For the first time in my life
Haiku # 56675, June 2, 2017 2:24 pm ET
by dvd
what were those light bulb
things called that ran the old main
frame computer things?
Haiku # 56674, June 2, 2017 2:17 pm ET
by vhs
the first bug ever
found in a mainframe was a
real moth, burned out on

one of those light bulbs
used to run computers
hence the term "bug"
Haiku # 56673, June 2, 2017 2:16 pm ET
by vhs
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