Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 40 Days and 77431 Haiku later...

Anti-Christ is here!
New Blockbuster in the hood
Let's burn it down now
Haiku # 55, December 20, 1996 1:08 pm ET
by Tom "blockbuster staff shouldn't be forced to be so damn friendly fo five bucks an hour" Third of Anytown, Anystate, Amerikkka,
Sitting in the tub
A spider floats toward me
drowned in bubble bath
Haiku # 54, December 20, 1996 4:04 am ET
by Tom"enjoys haiku about our insect brethren" Third of Toronto,
I love to be loved
I love loving to be loved
Love isn't pretty
Haiku # 53, December 20, 1996 3:58 am ET
by Demi Lovegod of City of Love,
Good God, what a mess!
My friends will think I'm a slob:
Justifiably.
Haiku # 52, December 19, 1996 7:10 pm ET
by Mr. Ed of Montréal,
There was this ant that.
Carried a big dead spider.
And so I killed it.
Haiku # 51, December 18, 1996 11:12 am ET
by Matt of TO, CA
The Macerena.
It sucks. It really does suck.
Don't play it. Ever.
Haiku # 50, December 18, 1996 11:09 am ET
by Jayne (Flip) of Richmond Hill, Canada
how many sylla
bulls should I have in each line
of a haiku?(damn!)
Haiku # 49, December 18, 1996 5:11 am ET
by frarn of DK
This hash breaks up good
I got no rolling papers
I'll do a BT
Haiku # 48, December 17, 1996 2:28 pm ET
by Suzie Q. of High Town, Toronto., Canada
Women can be nude.
Though just on their balconies
Nudity stages...
Haiku # 47, December 17, 1996 10:56 am ET
by Matt of Hogtown, Canaduh
Ignorance is bliss
Don't wanna know about it
Ignorance is bliss
Haiku # 46, December 16, 1996 7:15 pm ET
by Tom "574 D'oh!" Third of no fixed address,
Sometimes I wish time
went backwards. Then I'd always
be early not late.
Haiku # 45, December 16, 1996 9:17 am ET
by Ttam of Otnorot, Adanac
Last night I was bored
So I gave my cat a bath
Need cable TV
Haiku # 44, December 14, 1996 1:02 pm ET
by Janis of Toronto
Having a Christmas
party on a Thursday night
makes Friday real long
Haiku # 43, December 13, 1996 2:49 pm ET
by The Undead-Matt of Hangoverville, The grave.
A haiku a day
Will keep the doctor away,
Or so they say
Haiku # 42, December 13, 1996 5:53 am ET
by Tom "haiku isn't supposed to rhyme, you jerk" Third of Toronto,
Time for a visit
From that big black monolith
Ook ummph unga og!
Haiku # 41, December 13, 1996 5:48 am ET
by Tom Third of Toronto,
Clothes make the person.
Not having any clothes makes
the person naked.
Haiku # 40, December 12, 1996 2:35 pm ET
by Matt of Toronto, Canada
Procrastinating
I'm STILL procrastinating
I'm a loser babe
Haiku # 39, December 12, 1996 4:07 am ET
by Tom Third of Toronto,
o noble shag rug
your shaggy pile reigns supreme
my flesh is on fire
Haiku # 38, December 12, 1996 4:04 am ET
by Tom Third of Toronto,
Just a few bucks left
Should I buy some more light bulbs?
Or Veggie Burgers
Haiku # 37, December 12, 1996 3:32 am ET
by Tom "575" Third of Haikoolsville,
No kisses this week
Steadfast cold sore, so to speak
Planted on my beak
Haiku # 36, December 12, 1996 3:30 am ET
by Tom "575" Third of Haikoolsville,
Shaving with a blade
Or using an electric...
No skin off my nose
Haiku # 35, December 10, 1996 1:07 pm ET
by Tom Third of Toronto,
I am cat sitting
For two weeks, a brand new friend
Must hide mouse poison
Haiku # 34, December 10, 1996 1:05 pm ET
by Tom Third of Toronto,
Last night I had a
Terribly bad nightmare that
The Craver ate Frank
Haiku # 33, December 9, 1996 10:53 am ET
by janis of Toronto
Dear Mr. Bill Gates;
Everyone really hates you
Cause your OS sucks
Haiku # 32, December 9, 1996 10:50 am ET
by janis of Toronto
Don't drink that old milk
No, please let me buy some more
This stuff is sour
Haiku # 31, December 9, 1996 10:48 am ET
by janis of Toronto
Icons and symbols
Fill me with untold anger
Give me command line (for Robin)
Haiku # 30, December 9, 1996 10:46 am ET
by janis
Making a machine
Video goes everywhere
I dont understand
Haiku # 29, December 8, 1996 6:24 pm ET
by Robin Len of tv, side
Honey Comb's yummy
But there's always a burnt one
In every box
Haiku # 28, December 8, 1996 5:01 am ET
by Tom Third of Toronto,
haiku, and you ku
but then: he, she or it kus
goodnight, and thanku
Haiku # 27, December 7, 1996 11:32 pm ET
by Sean Montgomery of Toronto, Canada
don't forget that all
of your poetry is you
but they don't know it
Haiku # 26, December 7, 1996 3:58 am ET
by Kyle Mac Donald of Toronto, Canada
Honey Comb is so
sweet and crunchie, sweet and
crunchie! Yeah! Yeah! Shit!
Haiku # 25, December 5, 1996 9:26 pm ET
by One Tired Animator of Toronto, Canada
hair, my hairy hair
o hairy mass of bleached hair
i comb out your grease
Haiku # 24, December 5, 1996 2:53 am ET
by Tom Third of T.O.,
Include some tuna
In that pot of Kraft Dinner
You'll feel warm, fuzzy
Haiku # 23, December 5, 1996 2:41 am ET
by Tom Third of Toronto,
I have a cold sore
Please God, make it go away!
I have a hot date
Haiku # 22, December 5, 1996 2:23 am ET
by Tom Third of Toronto, Canada
I don't want to go
to school anymore... big sigh
Please!Enough haiku
Haiku # 21, November 28, 1996 5:21 pm ET
by very bad student
Fun times in the end
Sad times in the middle part
Bad times at the start
Haiku # 20, November 19, 1996 11:04 pm ET
by Robbie the Best
cold cold darn coldness
fingers frozen no escape
time to go to beach
Haiku # 19, November 18, 1996 4:09 pm ET
by anon
Haycu te quiero
Haycu me gusta
Haycu eres mi vida
Haiku # 18, November 18, 1996 4:02 pm ET
by cat of Toronto, Canada
My computer is so slow today
I really don't know why
I wish it could tag points in real time
Haiku # 17, November 17, 1996 5:59 pm ET
by Andrea of Toronto, Canada
Seventeen, seventeen.
Seventeen, seventeen?
seventeen ... seven!
Haiku # 16, November 17, 1996 3:03 am ET
by frank falcone
j-j-j-janis
hai-hai-hai-hai-hai-hai-HAI!
ha-ha-ha-haiku
Haiku # 15, November 15, 1996 5:27 pm ET
by robin
little lonesome lou
looked at leaves and looked at you
then laughed at haiku
Haiku # 14, November 15, 1996 5:24 pm ET
by Robin
I think I really stink
a bird pecked out my eyes
my hand is in a blender
Haiku # 13, November 15, 1996 5:24 pm ET
by tami gabay of toronto, Canada
bad haiku is good
good haiku is very, very bad
this one is just sad
Haiku # 12, November 15, 1996 5:16 pm ET
by dawn san
hey,alles wird gut
du wirst sehen, du janis
hey,alles wird gut
Haiku # 11, November 15, 1996 4:28 pm ET
by fay of toronto, canada
hey,alles wird gut
du wirst sehen, du janis
hey,alles wird gut
Haiku # 10, November 15, 1996 4:27 pm ET
by fay of toronto, canada
my home phone number
5301669
makes haiku complete
Haiku # 9, November 15, 1996 11:39 am ET
by Colin Withers of Toronto, Canada
Sometimes I feel like
I am the only one who
Cares about haiku
Haiku # 8, November 14, 1996 11:52 am ET
by janis
The morning fog lifts
Over the open city
The webcam is on
Haiku # 7, November 14, 1996 11:49 am ET
by janis
Huh uuh huh uh huh
Huh huh uuh uh huuh uh uh
Huh huh huh uuuh huuh
Haiku # 6, November 12, 1996 12:10 pm ET
by Marco Polsinelli
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