Bashō says something unhelpful
Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
29 Years, 76 Days and 78048 Haiku later...
Thanks Rappin' Poet.
Cover me in your hot spooge.
I'll drain your balls dry.

Fill up my stomach.
Stuff my ass with your manhood.
My ass satisfies.
Haiku # 51486 October 3, 2014 12:18 pm ET
by Rappin' Poet's Gay Bitch
Rappin poet back
To say: all you fools, ixnay
Your poetry: gay

Been years away, yes
Janice still rockin, go girl
You boys stroke your cocks

Squirt in yo face, ace
You're a big fat disgrace
Put yous in yo place
Haiku # 51485 October 3, 2014 12:08 pm ET
by Rappin Poet
english haiku suck ?
go spill your steaming entrails
we love them long time
Haiku # 51484 October 3, 2014 7:51 am ET
by ash
Jap haiku suck worse.
They're about used girls panties.
Sometimes Godzilla.

Haiku # 51483 October 3, 2014 12:05 am ET
by Darth Figpucker
English Haikus suck.
The language serves them poorly.
Subtlety is lost.
Haiku # 51482 October 2, 2014 4:56 pm ET
by jonafi
uiqnthrd
Haiku # 51480 October 1, 2014 4:08 pm ET
by uxidbygM of rNtxSove
Stick figure boners.
IUPAC nomenclature.
Manufacture meth.
Haiku # 51479 October 1, 2014 3:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
The scammers are back.
Scam scam scam scam scam scam scam.
Scam scam scam scam scam.
Haiku # 51478 September 30, 2014 8:04 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Now it's time for work.
Re-killing the dinosaurs.
I won't need coffee.
Haiku # 51477 September 30, 2014 8:01 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Hello!
Haiku # 51476 September 30, 2014 8:01 am ET
by toyrrour of USA
Money isn't bad.
Cookie monster makes me laugh.
Arabs are stupid.
Haiku # 51475 September 30, 2014 8:00 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
It's incoherent.
A mosquito bit my taint.
Take the kids to school.
Haiku # 51474 September 30, 2014 7:56 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Algorithmic spooge.
Mechanistic humping toy.
In walks my money.
Haiku # 51473 September 29, 2014 2:58 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Lets all do some stuff.
We can do things after that.
It just might be fun.
Haiku # 51472 September 29, 2014 2:50 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Scamming pill websites.
Send your money overseas.
Nigerian scammers.

Scam Scam Scam Scam Scam.
Scam Scam Scam Scam Scam Scam Scam.
Scam Scam Scam Scam Scam.

And now the weather.
In other news, I farted.
It covered Thailand.
Haiku # 51471 September 29, 2014 11:45 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
she said, If You Leave...
so I Ran (So Far Away)
Sheila Take a Bow
Haiku # 51469 September 29, 2014 3:53 am ET
by Lush
In The Air Tonight
Separate Ways (Worlds Apart)
Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Love
Haiku # 51468 September 29, 2014 3:21 am ET
by Lush of School Dance
There are no numbers.
God told me so in a dream.
Give me your money.
Haiku # 51467 September 28, 2014 6:52 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Far poop sniff trance wank
Stafford shire pueblo robs bank
New under the sun
Haiku # 51465 September 28, 2014 5:00 am ET
by Beagle the Destroyer
have Cat Scratch Fever,
so Don't Stand So Close to Me
need Doctor Feel Good
Haiku # 51463 September 28, 2014 12:22 am ET
by Beagle the Destroyer
Fire on the Mountain.
Hey Aqualung! Run away!
Don't stop believing
Haiku # 51462 September 28, 2014 12:16 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
And the winner is;
The Anonymous Poet
Score was five to four
Haiku # 51447 September 26, 2014 12:14 am ET
by Mandingo Ricola Ebola
A spam-free website?!
Janis is on top of things!
I'm a happy nerd.
Haiku # 51437 September 24, 2014 12:43 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
What Spider-Man eats?
Maybe lots of flies and moths.
That would really suck
Haiku # 51436 September 23, 2014 9:21 pm ET
by Math sucks
Arrogant teacher,
and an unprepared student
Bad combination
Haiku # 51435 September 22, 2014 11:18 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
That, sir, would be you.
Asking what's a twat-waffle
means that that is you.
Haiku # 51434 September 22, 2014 4:35 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
What's a twat-waffle?
I've heard it, but I don't know.
Someone please tell me.
Haiku # 51433 September 21, 2014 11:25 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
There is no beauty.
Ugliness does not exist.
Calm your mind and be.
Haiku # 51432 September 21, 2014 11:20 pm ET
by poems are not to be trusted
Mind. Your. Own. Business.
Else. You. Are. Just. A. Douchebag.
Dingleberry-breath.
Haiku # 51431 September 21, 2014 11:10 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Important suffix
Semicolon, period
Commas are the worst
Haiku # 51430 September 21, 2014 10:47 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Where are the spammers?
Did the FBI trick work?
Oh, I wish; if only!

Go to the spam websites and in their "contact" link type in an FBI or DEA phone number for them to call back. I did that a few times on those scam loan links and scam pill links. I wonder if they called the FBI and DEA. That would be funny! Damn, I'm an evil fucker. I love being evil. And cannibalism is like soooo 1995.
Haiku # 51429 September 21, 2014 11:12 am ET
by Darth Farty Pants Figpucker.
It's Saturday night
I'm making stupid poems
I party soooo hard!
Haiku # 51428 September 20, 2014 11:01 pm ET
by Mandingo Ricola Ebola
goodbye
Haiku # 51427 September 19, 2014 6:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
goodbye
Haiku # 51426 September 19, 2014 6:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
goodbye
Haiku # 51425 September 19, 2014 6:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
goodbye
Haiku # 51424 September 19, 2014 6:08 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
Okay, here's an idea....
On these spam websites is a contact page.
You can click that and send them rude messages, but what good will that do? Waste of time.

However, I think it would be interesting to send them what might seem a legit message to (1) waste their time and (2) for a return contact phone number put the phone number of your local FBI, ATF, DEA offices and/or even local police.

So, that's what I've been doing. Make these cocksucking mail order med spam companies call the DEA offices. How hilarious is that?
Haiku # 51414 September 19, 2014 9:50 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Just like King Elvis.
They will die taking a shit.
And I'll sell tickets.
Haiku # 51412 September 19, 2014 1:57 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
And before they die
pour scalding coffee down them.
They'll shit out their lives.
Haiku # 51411 September 19, 2014 1:55 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Not but blind torsos.
Blind and deaf with charcoal stumps.
Then starve them to death.
Haiku # 51410 September 19, 2014 1:54 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Adrenaline shots
so they can't go into shock.
Gouge out both their eyes!
Haiku # 51409 September 19, 2014 1:52 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Get the blow torches!
Tie them down; burn off their limbs.
Inject them with meth.
Haiku # 51408 September 19, 2014 1:51 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Now there is no spam.
I can be a douche bag too.
"Sorry but" "Hello".
Haiku # 51405 September 18, 2014 1:59 pm ET
by FUCK YOU SPAMMERS!!!!! of up your ass
chemistry is hard
hard like this damn chair on
buttermilk pancake
Haiku # 51351 September 18, 2014 12:25 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
I'll spell it backwards
noitcnufsyd elitcere
keep spammers away!
Haiku # 51350 September 18, 2014 11:54 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
frothy water pic
google+ is such a waste
roast beef or turkey
Haiku # 51349 September 18, 2014 11:52 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
falling rice bags kill
I need to go brush my teeth
yo momma so fat!
Haiku # 51348 September 18, 2014 11:51 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
induced suicide
teen girls overusing like
struck with a tuna
Haiku # 51347 September 18, 2014 11:50 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
only eight more now
it's universal conquest
or something like that
Haiku # 51346 September 18, 2014 11:49 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
why are you laughing
does this then make you happy
eat a big booger
Haiku # 51345 September 18, 2014 11:47 am ET
by Anonymous Poet