you can agonise
but at the end of the day
it's still bad haiku

what is the sound of
all these internet haiku?
one old man farting.

Star Wars given to
Oliver Stone or Quintin
Tarantino. Yup.

Fuck, time to wake up.
Get the little turds to school.
Come home and shoot up.

Jar-Jar Binks should be
a junkie in the new Star
Wars episodes. Yup.

Resistance is Fu-
tile, puerile, textile, senile.
Buy a new towel.

The spaceships are here.
So where is your fucking towel?
The answer: 42.

Jesus: the answer.
"Who stole my ounce of pot?!"
Yes, it was Jesus.

ENOUGH! FUCK 5-7-5! 365. These haiku are dead, not alive. Frankenstein animated lifeless electric digital shit for brains cow humping redneck mindless. There's no soul and they won't get to heaven or hell. These haiku will simply rot like my underwear that haven't been washed in 2 weeks. Thus I sign off to go read my Bible. You should too.

I will resist you
and I will continue to do
what I feel I must

if this isn't a cheap
ass shot of zen in the rear
I don't know what is

when does the joke die
in the throat and the voice of
a loved one is gone

but ye never knew
love then what values are
there but entropy

junk filled veins and the
rootless life of the city
moment by moment

nothing else, nelson algren,
iceberg slim, etc etc

a man who probably
embodies the fraction of
a shattered persona

versus a man who
desires to bring these gragments
to a whole, but the

sagas of star wars and
stories about beowulf from
grendel's pov...

the spoken word gave
to stone then to print, then to this
words can heal and

they can curse and they can lie

we grew up on star
wars, in a time when the boom
was waning and the

drive in was to change
to empty ruin, I met
darth vader as

a child, nothing to
report except legends come
to life, for will this

land of america
have a kalevala or
just a facebook set

all that will be lost
and the irony is no
one cares, I must take

up the sword and do
the thing that you do not wish
me to do, even

at pain of death and
I mean that quite literally
if you knew me...

I can only ask.
What purpose to be a tree?
God has made it so.

You can question why.
There is no other purpose.
Accept it or not.

Let all be as is.
Then you will find happiness.
And quit poetry.

;-)

Death to Mickey Mouse.
They stopped the clone wars series!
Kill their CEO!

Asshole: (1) An orifice that voids the body of unwanted waste. (2) A person who gets on poetry websites to write poems insulting poets and laughing when they let it get to them.

I fantasize about being 500 feet tall and using ppl I don't like for a suppository. As I fart them out, they would blast out of my anus like a human cannonball and splatter against tall buildings or brick walls. I guess, I fantasize about being the ultimate anus. Alas, I am but a lowly worm.

Speaking of worms!... A gay guy once described "worming"... letting an earthworm crawl into your urethra. I bet that feels great!... I'm signing off now. I think there are some fresh dingleberry pies about to come out of the oven.

then you'd better fucking explain to me what the whole point in being an asshole is in the first place

LOL @ U.
I go to church on Sunday.
It's fun to believe!

Jesus is my friend!
But he won't loan me money.
He knows me too well.

If you let assholes
like me get under your skin,
you will smell like shit.

Pores reek of feces.
Honey won't drip from your tongue.
Instead you breath farts.

Science is stupid.
I'd rather be a caveman
hunter gatherer.

Drawing animals.
Some tubers for the clay pot.
And a bit of meat.

Ignorance is bliss.
Knowledge can only bring pain.
Lobotomize me!

dorian grey prob.
is having a laugh at all of
our ugly hidden

pictures

I am tempted just
to say fuck it and let this guy
rant on about how

great that he's not
a poet and how fuck ward wonderful
his belief in science is

because he's too much of
a douche to let others
be themselves because

he thinks he's superior
by being a non believer

ok back to poetry

"Do you have belief?"
I have belief in the queef.
It smells like a reef.

It's the vaginal "thanks."
Sounds like whoopie cushion pranks.
From nice girls or skanks.

They're fun to record
on your cell phone when you're bored.
In i-tunes it's stored.

Well, what do you know!
Fuck me, the spammers are back!
"Please buy my shit now!"

Pulling my finger,
I fart into their fat mouths,
inflating their lungs.

Giving them new breath,
they spread across this bad world,
my undead army.

Infectious zombies,
Sending out advertisements
for cheap Viagra.

I want their money.
But they don't know how to share.
Slimy little fucks.

Well, at least they aren't poets.

your streams of conscious-
ness appear to have repeat-
edly neglected

the tying togeth-
er of three discrete ide
-as, one to each line

otherwise it's real-
ly just prose broken arbit-
rarily in three

devoid of reason
and absent explanation
voided my bowels

well given the world
we live in a place like this
gives us space to breathe

content malfunction
epidermal eruption
who gives in the end

please rule by my thumb
ignore it and it shall flee
house remains empty

what do the arts say
about the society that
makes them at the time

but what do we feed
what kind of life do you lead
that is worth living?

the thing is coming
from a protestant belief
can you mock and knock

salvation when this
world and its stupid games you
know don't really matter

you can do better
than mindless scandal any
braindead extrovert

like jerking off it's
a habit, look at him not
look at me you silly

goose, what of the logs
in your own eyes and quite frankly
how do you know I

wouldn't be pleased with
a thai lady boy?

Well, it's fun to
go back, forth, up, down, in, out...
OHHHH, God, YES!!!... I came.

well it's fun to go
back and forth ping ponging that
dread aesthetic ego

Kiss my ass hole fur.
You are squealing with the hole
of venereal

disease.

kiss my ass soldier
you are dealing with the soul
of a general

We need a good war.
Overpopulation check.
Poets at the front.

wars and rumours of
wars and statements about the
moment, remember

kosovo and serbia?

chemical warfare
petrochemical warfare
the same difference

Indiscriminate
homosexuality
predisposition.

Now half completed.
Dingleberry pressing book.
Who needs dumb flowers.

avant garde is not
me thinks in the cards for me
thinks it's all been done

irony gives way
to conformity the man
in the grey flannel

suit gives way to step
ford wives and the age of the
prozace eating child

what is missing is
that sense of variety
to see, to touch, i've

Obama said that.
"Please give me your vote for change."
When he meant "spare change".

I'll get a sex change.
And then be a lesbian.
Damn, South Park did it.

I'll change my Depends.
What does an old man taste like?
Depends!... Ewww! Effing gross!

when the bright and new
shiny thing doesn't sell no
more, expect a change

a real page turner
the digital moloch eats
everything it finds

classified my ass
you damn loki, get over
here and feed me now

It is classified.
Need to know basis only.
You don't need to know!

well did that conform
to standards or was that an
automatic haiku

█████████
███████████████
█████████

people often look
in reaction for what they want
lawyers interpret

half apparatus
has shafted the last of us
imagine past this

awoke with a start
dreamt my mother was Jewish
quoth, "I do declare."

tribe superior
by def: rest inferior
murder ev'ryone

haven't offended
haven't thought... most serious
'tis global warfare

one brother is one
one brother is another
sisters remittent