Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
28 Years, 65 Days and 77461 Haiku later...

Son's first word was Fuck.
Wonder where the little shit
picked up that language?
Haiku # 4699, October 12, 2000 6:49 pm ET
by frenchy
understanding life
gum on the sidewalk, try to
salvage the good stuff
Haiku # 4698, October 12, 2000 5:04 pm ET
by basho-maticus of none
be quick on the keys
at any time someone could
walk by and catch you
Haiku # 4697, October 12, 2000 4:08 pm ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
I love feminists!
those bitches are very skilled
at giving knobjobs
Haiku # 4696, October 12, 2000 4:02 pm ET
by evil twin of down under
test we had today
about proteins. not a lot
of fun... bah, bio
Haiku # 4695, October 12, 2000 3:02 pm ET
by Guy MOntag
stimpack! stimpack! fall
back! attack! and hast thou slain
the zergish horde? yay
Haiku # 4694, October 12, 2000 2:59 pm ET
by Guy M0ntag
sigh so bored. hydras
and marines move so slowly
on this crappy comp
Haiku # 4693, October 12, 2000 2:57 pm ET
by _Guy Montag
fried green tomatoes
just spray on butter, and throw
them in the oven, yum!
Haiku # 4692, October 12, 2000 2:55 pm ET
by Guy Montag_
im bored bored bored bored
nothing to do today or
the next... no school
Haiku # 4691, October 12, 2000 2:51 pm ET
by Guy_Montag
rendering beef fat
watching protien shrink in size
God bless spatula
Haiku # 4690, October 12, 2000 12:44 pm ET
by oldnasty
Friday the Thirteenth.
Luckiest day to be born.
Send Sheena Mothballs!
Haiku # 4689, October 12, 2000 11:29 am ET
by frenchy
Swallowing me whole
Watery vision distorts
I can not escape
Haiku # 4688, October 12, 2000 10:17 am ET
by Kackarott
Shooting boy-butter
is almost automatic
with suction applied.
Haiku # 4687, October 12, 2000 9:09 am ET
by frenchy
Boy, I love Guinness!
Dark beer, nectar from the Gods!
Wish I had some now.
Haiku # 4686, October 12, 2000 8:34 am ET
by frenchy
Kimberly, you make
an excellent point about
toplessness. More boobs!
Haiku # 4685, October 12, 2000 5:44 am ET
by frenchy
My mechanic said
to change turn signal fluid.
What brand should I try?
Haiku # 4684, October 12, 2000 5:33 am ET
by frenchy
Haiku # 4683, October 12, 2000 1:12 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Kindly omit the
word "mean" from my last haiku.
...meant to delete it.
Haiku # 4682, October 11, 2000 7:55 pm ET
by Kimberly Dawn Sowell of Naiad, Neptune
Ignorance:

This word is worse than
that word. Nevermind that they mean
express the same thing.
Haiku # 4681, October 11, 2000 7:52 pm ET
by Kimberly Dawn Sowell of Naiad, Neptune
Women's magazines--
How to submit and conform
to ideals of men.
Haiku # 4680, October 11, 2000 7:48 pm ET
by Kimberly Dawn Sowell of Naiad, Neptune
flutter, flutter, flutt,
flutter, flutter, flutter, flutt;
nibble nibble nibb
Haiku # 4679, October 11, 2000 7:47 pm ET
by The Moths
The shirt, the veil, they
are the same: a limit to
make men feel stronger.
Haiku # 4678, October 11, 2000 7:29 pm ET
by Kimberly Dawn Sowell of Naiad, Neptune
Why are men allowed
to be publicly topless,
while women are not?
Haiku # 4677, October 11, 2000 7:28 pm ET
by Kimberly Dawn Sowell of Naiad, Neptune
If I want to die,
that is my right. I had no
choice in being born.
Haiku # 4676, October 11, 2000 7:27 pm ET
by Kimberly Dawn Sowell of Naiad, Neptune
Integrity of
self, or living inside the
law? How can I choose?
Haiku # 4675, October 11, 2000 7:25 pm ET
by Kimberly Dawn Sowell of Naiad, Neptune
Ash, only forty two?
I have socks older than you.
From my great grandpa!
Haiku # 4674, October 11, 2000 6:46 pm ET
by frenchy
Try exorcism.
Moths are spawn of Hell itslef.
That should do the trick.
Haiku # 4673, October 11, 2000 6:43 pm ET
by frenchy
Sheena, moths are back?
Try using a flamethrower.
Wait. Don't. Moths like light.
Haiku # 4672, October 11, 2000 6:41 pm ET
by frenchy
nothing is finer
then entering vagina
from right behind her.
Haiku # 4671, October 11, 2000 4:56 pm ET
by frenchy
with regards to age
i am the meaning of life
or so some mice say
Haiku # 4670, October 11, 2000 3:51 pm ET
by ash
twenty first replay
since my twenty first bithday
i am so ancient
Haiku # 4669, October 11, 2000 3:50 pm ET
by ash
i feel like granny
all i need is rimless specs
and a hairy wart
Haiku # 4668, October 11, 2000 3:46 pm ET
by sheena
ash, i won't sing song
in nasal monotone whine-
but how old you now?
Haiku # 4667, October 11, 2000 3:43 pm ET
by sheena
Vingt-et-Un:

well if frenchy's right
tis all birthday bullpatties
no more birthdays? cool.
Haiku # 4666, October 11, 2000 3:42 pm ET
by sheena
oh, MOTHs.......like zombies
i crunch you but you return-
silver spike heels work?
Haiku # 4665, October 11, 2000 3:39 pm ET
by sheena
my birthday is soon
friday the thirteenth...really!
lucky, lucky me.
Haiku # 4664, October 11, 2000 3:36 pm ET
by sheena
happy birthday ash!
you too guy montag--fifteen?!
wow i feel so old
Haiku # 4663, October 11, 2000 3:34 pm ET
by sheena
The Nightmare:

maggots transmitting
telepathic images,
waiting for the feast.
Haiku # 4662, October 11, 2000 9:14 am ET
by Kimberly Dawn Sowell of Naiad, Neptune
Haiku # 4661, October 11, 2000 9:14 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Haiku # 4660, October 11, 2000 9:14 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Haiku # 4659, October 11, 2000 9:14 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
i'm madly in love
with sweetest girl ever
wish she was here now...
Haiku # 4658, October 11, 2000 4:20 am ET
by Guy Montag
Congrats, Ash. if you
are a sexy lady, call
me for birthday hug!
Haiku # 4657, October 11, 2000 4:12 am ET
by guy_montag
a shaft of sunlight
held true by one cloud impales
a smoke and steel sky
Haiku # 4656, October 10, 2000 8:28 pm ET
by mount madonna mama
hand carved and hard worn
wooden bowl shines as sunlight
dances off it's brim


Haiku # 4655, October 10, 2000 8:20 pm ET
by mount madonna mama
Test test damned server
Put this haiku up for the
Whole world to ponder
Haiku # 4654, October 10, 2000 8:11 pm ET
by J of SM
and so i did it
after all those many years
another birthday
Haiku # 4653, October 10, 2000 6:18 am ET
by ash
some minutes from now
how shall i become older
somewhat gracefully
Haiku # 4652, October 10, 2000 5:38 am ET
by ash
no consequences
no reprisal, no recoil
no blame...only guilt
Haiku # 4651, October 9, 2000 3:37 pm ET
by dirty washcloth of SantaClara, CA
Hooray! I'm fifteen!
Things to do: get laid, get laid,
and, uh, er, get laid?
Haiku # 4650, October 9, 2000 3:32 pm ET
by Guy Montag
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