i'm a huge loser
nothing i say is funny
i live with my mom

flurry of haikus
pelt this site like the blizzard
soon bearing down

where've you been
i've been looking all over
checked the toilet twice

to prove it's really
me take my DNA for evidence
open your mouth say.."AAAH"

no fun house this hall
of mirrors where imposters
roam with impunity

i suck your mom's tit
right before my afternoon
naps...i dried her out

you suck

where are you father
why are you not proud of me
flesh of your foul flesh

at some point ego
inflates beyond its limits
pop goes the weasel

.......(rodent balloons for sale)

you'll never beat me
haiku Judas that you are
now go hang yourself

the time has not come
to Get A Life or A Girlfriend
girls are too scary

bozo can juggle
even more than we all thought
is that a chain saw?

....................(cuts of head)

excuse me again
mom dipped my pacifier
in high fructose corn

....................syrup! The white man's poison!

shut up miscreant
zabadooey or "you suck"
whomever you are you fuck

i shan't clean my room
no matter what mommy says
i'm a big boy now

off my meds again!
rollercoaster of love man
my butt's the best ride

perhaps a vegan
diet might quell your thirst
for blood gentlemen

vivisection ain't
all that it's cut out to be
pun..ishing fucker!

bone marrow has great
nutritional value but
I couldn't deal with

........his incessant screaming

i shall feel your meat
then masticate your gristle
vomit on the bones

I bet that one chic has a big fat stinky pussy!

inmates run amok
on the ward shhh! shrinks
are getting their ECT

the dance craze here the
Haldol Shuffle attendants
hold loonies at bay

what if I realized
there's other forums besides
this one and wrote there?

what if they opened
a site to write bad haiku
and no one bothered

I quit my day job
because the head chef ask me
to toss his salad

cover me with tattoos
Maori tattoos 'cause I
want to eat your child

with a haiku pen
he cut them three ways, wide deep
and repeatedly

father o' father
why hast thou forsaken me
'twas an accident

in it heat it dripped
like a cherry popsicle
chlamydia sucks

mad cow disease and
bad haiku..imports from 'cross
the pond to die for

sit on my face and
let our juices mingle thine
essence melds with mine

give me sinewy
haikus to gnash I want to
taste its' gaminess

Tourette's boy stuck on
"you suck you suck you suck you
suck you do indeed

you suck

suck..suck..suck..gurgle
odd how these sounds mimic sex
death and infancy

haiku #45206 Anon
singular focused robot
it walks and it talks...

push its' button and
it will speak.."you suck" "you suck"
and made by Mattel*

......* - batteries not included

"you suck" REDUX
fifteen more syllables and
you've made a haiku

"Haiku Help Line?" It's
me again still stuck on two
syllables, please help!!

thrice a day I suck..le
from Anon's mom's six teats
jackal that she is

....I never tire at this

when the image dies
the dream becomes a nightmare
and fades all to black

you suck

cuckold heaven/hell
cream pies and facials all caught
on videotape

what'll come first the
fifty thousandth bad haiku
or leap from the ledge

the mind is such a
terrible thing to waste here
at the haiku dump

the waste is such a
terrible thing to mind here
at the haiku dump

blithe spirits roam free
babbling brooks of bad haiku
and misanthropy

sybil walks here her
thirteen haiku faces mask
one tormented soul

grace jones walking in
the rain at night but Nippress
prefers a crisp dawn

A child? No, think not
Obsessed? Yes definitely
Pre-trans-gender? yes

Illiterate. No
Narrow field of knowledge? Yes
Mentally Ill? Yes.

Sky crisp and bright blue
And not a cloud to be seen
It's time for a walk

Four One Nine help me
Forty Million waits for you
Please return my call.

"Haiku Help Line"....I
have two syllables but now
I'm stuck...please help me!