Sore ars from bad diet?
Too much pre-processed junk food?
You need more roughage

Girlfriends half my age
Get odd looks from my age group
Horror and envy

Do they think I

Masculinity
Lots of stupid comments
I wore a pink tie

Try prostitution
Seems like good value to me
Try before you pay

Dam contraceptives
Not big enough for load
Try a bin liner

Ash has ninja grace
letters fly like throwing stars
Warrior poets

letters spray i say
let us pray they stay that way
in some disarray

A PIMPLE SWIRL SIN
A LIMPER SLIP WINS
A LIMPER LIPS WINS
A SIMPLE SWIRL PIN
A PILSNER LIP SWIM
A LINER SLIPS WIMP
A RIPPLE SLIM WINS
A SLIPPER MIL WINS
A PERILS LIMP WINS
A MINERS SWILL PIP
A PRIME WILL SPINS
A SIMPER WILL SPIN
A PINE SWILL PRISM
A NIPPER ILL SWIMS
A NIPPER WILL MISS
A SPINE WILL PRISM
A RESIN SWILL PIMP
A RINSE SWILL PIMP
A PIPER MILLS WINS
A MELL WIN RIP PISS
A SWELL PIMP IN SIR
A MEN ILL RIP WISPS
A SWELL RIM SIN PIP
A PERM I SPILL WINS
A PENIS WILL PRISM
A WINERS ILL PIMPS
A WINERS LIMP LIPS
Help yourself Brad, I don

My Haiku

A BROODY FRONT TO
A BODY OF TORN ROT
A NOB FORDO TO TRY
A NOB FORD TOO TRY
A NOB DO OF ORT TRY
A NOB DR OF TOO TRY
A NOB DR FOR TO TOY
A NOB DRY FOOT ROT
A BORN FOOD TO TRY
A BORN TODY OF ROT
A BONY ROD OF TORT
A BOO DONT FRY ROT
A ROBOT DRY OF TON
A BOOT DR OF NO TRY
A BOOT DR FOR TONY
A BOOTY FROND ROT
A ORB DONT FRY TOO
A BORT FOOD ON TRY
AT BOY DR OF NO ROT
AT BOT DRY ROOF ON
AT BOT NOD FOR ROY
AT NOB DRY OF ROOT
Are you bored of Anagrams of Brad of Toronto?

Four and seven and five
Not a haiku, but ok
Are you my fan club?

"William Nippress"
becomes "A LIMP PENIS SWIRL"
Anagrams are cool

i love suprises
but am too impatient
to wait all day, tell now

What to do tonight
What will make you interesting
Beer is the answer

I got a new Jeep
Chrome spinners are so bling bling
More money than brains

Pulling up brambles
Masochistic gardener
Removes both his gloves

Prickly cactuses
Not much fun on a picnic
Watch out where you sit

The consequences
Irritable, lack of sleep
Seratonin drop
*
Neurotransmitter
Postsynaptic, the dendrite
Stay off the grass man

Maninka, Guinea
Forests, Sierra Leone
Artisans, and slaves

go go maninka
sweet west african music
we are not worthy

Writing bad Haiku
Confirms inadequacies
Dark secrets laid bear

Free advertising
Do you honestly believe?
Anyone will look?

Comforting bondage
I love the tight restrictions
Of the bad haiku

Nothing sexier
What is it a man looks for?
A smiling woman
*
That is an invite
On purpose or otherwise
No man can resist

You

Penal servitude
What does it mean? Servile?
Sexual attitude?

we've got insatiable
sexual energy
whats a guy to do?

There's no bad haiku
That I can find at this site
Just cunning linguists

just go for a surf
you'll be bound to enjoy it
banish slavery

Biting cold north wind
Aussei told me, I like it!
It

The next thing I

What

a slave would be nice
whilst i'm not into bondage
i'd go for a serf

only the parts seen
all the rest of me's the same
and the inside's not

some things never change
at least that's what people say
but which things are these ?

There is beauty in
Everything except a
Derby victory

Times surreal moment
Salvador Dali

Positivism
The new negative approach
Management gurus

What! The earth

Lacking in foresight
Walk into the cupboard door
Bleeding from head wound

Useless drive in church
Spiritual dynamism
In and out absolved

the only sex had
was toothy hurt fat blow job
in two thousand five

character struggle;
stick-to-itiveness tested,
position bested

Optimism less,
Spirit fraught with misery;
hapless dithery.

Out of the window
The car park is full of cars
Big ones and small ones

Trying to give up
Smoking by writing haiku
Doesn't seem to work

A Paving Slabs Lament

Everybody walks
All over me and sometimes
Dogs crap on my head