How can we miss you
If you do not go away
Abracadabra!

Fuck and poop
is all i get nowadays.
Fuck my ass.

You are a moron
Incapable of proper spelling
Grammar, or meter.
Please depart and die.

Blackly, women melt.
The girls clash therefore pears wake.
Spring kisses candles.

Smooth poisons set winds.
Cruelly, hard love clashes.
Black eagerness plays.

I am a penis,
which will not come,
betwen us...
get it? I made a pun!
Ain't I funny?? ha, ha,
ho, ho homosexual!!

I have no balls,
or nuts as you like,
just a patch of,
cellulite

I will grow bored in defending my moniker.
Those devoid of creativity
can suck a fart out of mine ass.

Hey! That's not from me!
Shut the fuck up you asshole!
I don't know Maestro.

Cursed imposters
Who fail to compose haiku
Must be abolished

Maestro is my sunshine,
my gay love slave,
and my hope for all
mankind..

I am a little bitch
because I like to choke
my chicken
in the morning's fresh
light, and dew.

I could write better
With my brian on crystal meth
Brian? Who the fuck...

Sphincter expansion
Comes with the territory
53rd and 3rd

Friday rocks my ass!
My favorite day by far,
Time to get crunked up.

my mom is deadly
coke up her nose means there isnt
any coke in the fridge

All mainlines collapsed
Morphine suppository
Rectal salvation

Poetry and porn
What else does the net provide?
Oh, bomb recipes.

My woman is cold.
Bitter, sub-zero cold. Like
Liquid Nitrogen.

I hear you laughing
when I tell the snowflakes I
need a little time

In my dreams I am
falling in autumn leaves and
love laughing, laughing

You can't write haiku
You have been forbidden by
my mean chihuahua

Who can't write haiku?
Its' easier than writing
Really long poems

Don't grow up too fast.
Someday you will have to pay
someone to bathe you.

A teaspoon of cream
is a much better deal than
licking a dead fish.

I'm lightening up.
Trying not to be sober.
Hooray! It's working!

I have lost my "S"
This one simple change means that
now I'm just inane.

Mimi in new york,
Great writer, excellent blog!
Just finished August...

Better to be a
Smart ass rather than a dumb
ass, so says mother.

Prior two haiku
Are not those of the maestro
You are an asshole

I worship the Viet Cong
because they tortured
soldiers
Real good-like!

I am a communist,
Pinko, Lefty spy...
All of you will
surely die

Snow finds blue full spring.
Summer flusters huge arrows.
Spring clashes a hand.

Snow finds blue full spring.
Summer flusters huge arrows.
Spring clashes a hand.

Folded shit stained sheets
Into putrid Rorschach Test
Saw bottle of booze

Awoke this morning
To delirium tremens
Shat myself and wept

Capitalism
Inevitability
Cannibalism

Googled for Haiku
Stumbled onto a porn site
not much poetry

Counting grains of sand
should take up most of my day
I could use some help

Wal-mart sex oil sales
Up during "sex holidays."
Cheap lube for my menz!

It say's,"Bad Haiku"
Can't all be as good as you.
Excuse my mistake

"er" is seventh. Bah!
Counting can be hard without
Seven lil' fing"er"s.

Riding for Jesus
Twist the throttle wide open
and say all your prayers

Headless fish laying
stinking on the sun drenched pier
Didn't make it home

Counting syllables
One, two, three, four, five, seven
What happened to six?

Why cross the wide road?
To get to the other side...
Watch out for bird flew.

The pterodactyl
is past like the rest and all ~
it's not poetic.

The double dactyl,
Like "gastrointestinal"
Is most poetic

a clever arsehole
delivering smart humour
must be a wisecrack