Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 344 Days and 77325 Haiku later...

worst blow job ever
wild badgers are more gentle
i'll be sore for days
Haiku # 29902, May 1, 2003 2:46 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
the date has gone wrong
i switch over to plan b
drug her and fuck her
Haiku # 29901, May 1, 2003 2:42 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
i'll go to japan
and study zen for a while
perhaps i'll be cured
Haiku # 29900, May 1, 2003 2:40 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
why am i so hot
i really can't answer that
just nature i guess
Haiku # 29899, May 1, 2003 2:39 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
I am from the rough streets of
Compton (represent!) I had no
daddy. Mamma raised us 7 kids
workin 3 jobs. I ran with the gangs
and now I am a lawyer.....
Go figure
Haiku # 29898, May 1, 2003 2:04 pm ET
by Leotis Smith-Sharrington of Los Angeles
PENCIL NECK GEEKS YOU ARE,
NEVER GONNA GET TO FAR,
MAYBE MEET A HO IN A BAR,
THEN TAKE HER HOME IN YOUR CAR
THEN THE U.S. AND IRAQ AT WAR
YOU HAVE GONE TOO FAR,
SHMIZZLE SHMAZZLE SHMARRR
Haiku # 29897, May 1, 2003 2:00 pm ET
by HIP HOP of COMPTON
Shizm my Nizm,
Wankstagankstamasta
Haiku # 29896, May 1, 2003 1:58 pm ET
by doobie of va
sexually frustrated is a punk,
smells like a skunk,
with no slam dunk,
what a chump,
on the head is a bump,
he is a lump
Haiku # 29895, May 1, 2003 1:57 pm ET
by Anonymous Poet
crows and a vulture
sharing same squirrel, maybe we
can all get along
Haiku # 29894, May 1, 2003 12:17 pm ET
by onjaysun (symbolism?...schmymbolism!)
so i returned from
new orleans...jazz fest, there's
no words for it all.....

except....fuck off moxie!
Haiku # 29893, May 1, 2003 5:01 am ET
by k
Nearly seven years -
I certainly deserve this,
but this can't go on...
Haiku # 29892, May 1, 2003 4:59 am ET
by R. of PT
That shouldn't take so long...
One year became three, then six -
Please, please, have this stop!
Haiku # 29891, May 1, 2003 4:08 am ET
by R. of PT
I'll rephrase it here:
how long can this mad story
keep go on like this?
Haiku # 29890, May 1, 2003 4:02 am ET
by R. of PT
Ten years old is fun,
then twenty, thirty, forty.
What does happen then?
Haiku # 29889, May 1, 2003 4:00 am ET
by R. of PT
If everyone knew
about the drinking and the sex
they
Haiku # 29888, May 1, 2003 3:53 am ET
by William Nippress
Ich habe den Affe
Und es ist schneller als dich
Aber nicht so gro
Haiku # 29887, May 1, 2003 3:44 am ET
by A Student of Linford Christie ist nicht so schnell wie meinen Affe
Entschldigung aber das ist Schei
Haiku # 29886, May 1, 2003 3:41 am ET
by A Student of That makes more sense
Ich bin ein Student
Aber ich studiert?
Nein, Ich trinke gern
Haiku # 29885, May 1, 2003 3:39 am ET
by A Student of At least I can get back into the first year next year
If non of this lot
appeals you had better keep
studying ASS OFF
Haiku # 29884, May 1, 2003 3:11 am ET
by William Nippress
Or better still join
a church and become an new
age evangelist
Haiku # 29883, May 1, 2003 3:10 am ET
by William Nippress
You don
Haiku # 29882, May 1, 2003 3:08 am ET
by William Nippress
Be smart marry a
rich girl and become a sponge
off her family
Haiku # 29881, May 1, 2003 3:06 am ET
by William Nippress
Give all up have some
fun, that
Haiku # 29880, May 1, 2003 3:04 am ET
by William Nippress
But it
Haiku # 29879, May 1, 2003 2:59 am ET
by William Nippress
Study brings its own
Rewards, bad breath, hair loss
and a job you hate
Haiku # 29878, May 1, 2003 2:56 am ET
by William Nippress
Time ticks by and wham!
Suddenly you are sixty
Where the hell life gone?
Haiku # 29877, May 1, 2003 2:52 am ET
by William Nippress
damn i spoke to soon
it's all good i'm buying time
instead of working...
Haiku # 29876, May 1, 2003 1:22 am ET
by tiger of vegas
wow hey look at that
all were written on the odd
just like i like it!!!
Haiku # 29875, May 1, 2003 1:20 am ET
by tiger of vegas
Hot Hot Heat rock on
oh who left the door unlocked
she's not a secret.
Haiku # 29874, May 1, 2003 1:19 am ET
by tiger of vegas
a test tomorrow
i'm studying with the moon
and drinking V8!
Haiku # 29873, May 1, 2003 1:17 am ET
by tiger of vegas
finished my paper
now on to the next hell hole
critical thinking...
Haiku # 29872, May 1, 2003 1:15 am ET
by tiger of vegas
damn that sigmund freud
he sure smoked to much cocaine
had sex on the brain.
Haiku # 29871, May 1, 2003 1:11 am ET
by tiger of vegas
first we're the people
our parents warned us about
then we're our parents
Haiku # 29870, May 1, 2003 12:35 am ET
by ash
swinging pendulum
the neverending tick tock
till death do i part
Haiku # 29869, May 1, 2003 12:27 am ET
by sexually frustrated
boundaries are blurred
where does a mirror finish
which object is real
Haiku # 29868, May 1, 2003 12:15 am ET
by ash
a closet dweller
or a fucked up psychopath
how are we alike
Haiku # 29867, May 1, 2003 12:08 am ET
by sexually frustrated
we are each other
so i could hardly hate you
although i could try
Haiku # 29866, May 1, 2003 12:05 am ET
by ash
i'm in the closet
sexual ambivalence
makes hostile haiku
Haiku # 29865, May 1, 2003 12:03 am ET
by sexually frustrated
when you do your thing
you're making fun of my thing
also vice versa
Haiku # 29864, May 1, 2003 12:01 am ET
by sexually frustrated
you control meter
making geriatric poems
where's your blood and guts
Haiku # 29863, April 30, 2003 11:59 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
i am a mirror
reflections of other lives
and none of my own
Haiku # 29862, April 30, 2003 11:58 pm ET
by ash
get your own thing
plenty of mine to go round
here, take some, with love
Haiku # 29861, April 30, 2003 11:55 pm ET
by ash
you may do my thing
although you are redundant
i can do my thing
Haiku # 29860, April 30, 2003 11:51 pm ET
by ash
my thoughts on arseholes ?
i don't have a policy
each case on merit
Haiku # 29859, April 30, 2003 11:49 pm ET
by ash
i can do your thing
more powerfully than you can
but there's still JV
Haiku # 29858, April 30, 2003 11:41 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
iambic asshole
if you can't have stress unstress
you might as well die
Haiku # 29857, April 30, 2003 11:37 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
look at my rhythm
so mellifluous and smooth
but emptiness reigns
Haiku # 29856, April 30, 2003 11:34 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
like a worn out shell
using form without content
go sell insurance
Haiku # 29855, April 30, 2003 11:31 pm ET
by sexually frustrated
what graceful haiku
but it signifies nothing
poop has more meaning
Haiku # 29854, April 30, 2003 11:28 pm ET
by sexually frustrated (i am your muse, aren't you ashamed?)
metaphor a day
we spent the night together
well well well well well
Haiku # 29853, April 30, 2003 11:19 pm ET
by ash
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