speaking of forbidden fruit
aren't we where the cradle
of civilization is? at war now?

having this disease,
is speeding my adulthood,
and also my end.

When I'm sixty-eight
I want my trophy wife to
Clean the house quickly

do not write of mox'
he is the forbidden fruit
of all bad haiku

Do you remember your first blowjob? I do, so does the guy who's dick I was sucking! Ha, ha!

I hate pussy,
Smells like tuna fish,
I like the smell of ball sweat.

Why do my balls itch?
And they smell funny too.
What the fuck is that goo??

Now the trolls are in;
a damaging side effect
of their haiku war

Tugging unknowing
Rancorous rushing hill stream
Laughing pebble sleeps

fuck off moxie

Wide bridesmaids passion
Sadly always the bridesmaid
But never the bride

Sluggish reflection
Slumbering girl emerges
Asking for breakfast

Massive bordellos
Moved to the front, they yell out
We need more fuckups

Slowly Insults you
A politician

Hawkishly sharp smooth
The politicians move
Between the news crews

Mike Tyson is large
And intimidating but
Little Mac won't fall.

No class in morning
At least that's what I recall...
Where's my syllabus?

My friendly challenge...
Facing stiff competition--
Can't get any love.

Not meaning to brag.
Just confidence in myself
And compilation.

Grimey fears nothing
Music on my stereo
Kickin' your ear's crotch

vegas indeed rocks
must go, get your party on
rogue is a good date

frank issued challange
to topple 'shit going down'
foolish mortal...doomed

done with work for now,
ready for a hip weekend,
i'm off to vegas!

gourmet of the ear,
nothing like shit going down,
hot composition.

i'm a funny guy
so fatally humorous
i just kill myself

driving home from work
car hits pole, bounces off bridge
no salvation here

the mirror shatters
use the glass to cut my veins
life drains with my blood

my name is steven
reents, yes that iswho i am
i am a flamer

I call the Onion
Everyday, they won't hire me
Those cheesehead fuckers.

This recession hurts everyone
The drug dealers can't get paid
And run lemonade stands instead.

When life fucks you in
The ass, make sure to grin
And use lube.

"They're showering us with scented
Candles. How wonderful!"
"Those are molotovs, Bill, and your
helmit's on fire."

I hate this Zoloft
Makes it impossible
To ejaculate.

"Wow, look at all them colors."
"Dad, have you been drinking turpentine again."
"Don't you judge me boy!"

Go on son, run right
On into oncoming traffic
Believe me, it's better that way.

You don't understand
officer, this is
Medicinal crack.

Why are you sprinkling
Water on your Big Mac?
To cast out demons.

Can't they hurry this along
Doesn't the Pentagon know this is
sweeps month and they can lose valuable market share if the war gets uneventful. It's like they've learned nothing from corporate America.

Uh Shareef, you might want to
Remove that Nike t-shirt before
You burn the U.S. flag on Al Jizeera.

who stole my sammich,
bet it was the playful monkey,
eatin dat sammich dat was mine...

Argy bargy,
Argy bargy,
Belchhhhhh...

Elvis has left the building,
But someone better is coming,
And they gonna bring candy!

Evil is subtle
This isn't a war for oil
It is for control

the southern baptist
may have lots of good people
but the blind leading the blind

to armageddon is quite
well, the mad ragnaroc
of the Cross

russia, turkey, and
all these other powers come
together on this...

I can see Megiddo now
and the Final Battle, over
oil, for crissake!

crap on bobbie's head
for making you go to class
time to kick his ass.

how was the paper?
oh man you had a test too
what is that about?

hey there what's up bob
the haiku exchange was fun
need more haiku time!

Respect The Viet Cong,
Torture professionals incorporated.
They are really KEWLLL...

wush for anything
a vietnam vet with a monkey
and a banjo, far out man..