Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 351 Days and 77336 Haiku later...

Bob liked the long jump
He was the best in college
Then he lost to Geoff
Haiku # 25476, January 13, 2003 7:21 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
Venus is nasty
If I, say, lived on Venus
I would be poisoned
Haiku # 25475, January 13, 2003 6:44 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
heavenly divorce
a ring around uranus
but not your finger
Haiku # 25474, January 13, 2003 5:23 am ET
by ash
I am empowered
by your presence, by your gaze
I can move planets
Haiku # 25473, January 13, 2003 1:14 am ET
by jer
with sheer force of will
I would change planetary
alignments for you
Haiku # 25472, January 13, 2003 1:14 am ET
by jer
To suit your fancy
I rearrange the heavens,
anything for you
Haiku # 25471, January 13, 2003 1:13 am ET
by jer
I would pluck venus
from its eliptical path
'round to us to view
Haiku # 25470, January 13, 2003 1:12 am ET
by jer
I would bathe your face
in the white light of venus,
just to see your smile
Haiku # 25469, January 13, 2003 1:12 am ET
by Jer
And lo... Ted Roberts
Our Lord and saviour was born
To teach PEF
Haiku # 25468, January 12, 2003 6:38 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
But then Lucifer
Brought forth media studies
And he was cast down
Haiku # 25467, January 12, 2003 6:36 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
In the beginning
The Lord made PEF and
Saw that it was good
Haiku # 25466, January 12, 2003 6:35 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
About a proper poem I wrote
I just wrote a poem
And it didn't take the piss
The first time ever
Haiku # 25465, January 12, 2003 5:09 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
That's not a haiku
But PEF is damn hard
And I shall not pass
Haiku # 25464, January 12, 2003 4:57 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
Statistically
Nearly everyone gets 40
And fails PEF
Haiku # 25463, January 12, 2003 4:49 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
When I am no more
I would like people to say
"He passed PEF"
Haiku # 25462, January 12, 2003 4:48 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
Paper clips are used
Every day as holding aids
For normal people
Haiku # 25461, January 12, 2003 3:57 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
I was speaking of
PEF , great thing it is
And not jaffa cakes
Haiku # 25460, January 12, 2003 3:41 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
we still discussing
PEF? or something else?
just a wayward thought
Haiku # 25459, January 12, 2003 3:03 pm ET
by sheena
It is assumptions,
Material balances
Amusing but hard
Haiku # 25458, January 12, 2003 2:19 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
I've written this before:
P is for process
E stands for engineering
F - fundamentals
Haiku # 25457, January 12, 2003 2:17 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
A jaffa cake:
A small cake type thing
With orange jelly on top
Covered in chocolate
Haiku # 25456, January 12, 2003 2:16 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
what's a jaffa cake?
and actually, i've been
curious: what's PEF?
Haiku # 25455, January 12, 2003 2:00 pm ET
by sheena
in horrible class
feeling sick; i should not have
bothered to attend
Haiku # 25454, January 12, 2003 1:58 pm ET
by sheena
Jaffa cakes are nice
And technically under
UK law are cakes
Haiku # 25453, January 12, 2003 10:31 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
And I resisted
The temptation to point out
That it's illegal
Haiku # 25452, January 12, 2003 10:30 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
Needless to say the
Person responsible was
Acting to help out
Haiku # 25451, January 12, 2003 10:30 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
Paedophilia
I read something two days back
Encouraging it
Haiku # 25450, January 12, 2003 10:29 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
Tomorrow begins
Every time that our current
Day passes us by
Haiku # 25449, January 12, 2003 10:25 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
Lots of bubble wrap
Received in the post today
I may play with it
Haiku # 25448, January 12, 2003 10:20 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
Hast du meinen Hund?
Ja, ich habe deinen Hund
Aber er ist tot
Haiku # 25447, January 12, 2003 9:00 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
I can't find out now
Some sucka has posted a
Lot of rubbish since
Haiku # 25446, January 12, 2003 7:31 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
Have I been poked by
A man with a stick before
In an old haiku?
Haiku # 25445, January 12, 2003 7:30 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
Perfunctorily
Excitable echo ends
Foolish flooding fiend
Haiku # 25444, January 12, 2003 6:58 am ET
by A Student of Manchester
massive cheekiness
loser idiot spoiler
unresourceful pest
Haiku # 25443, January 12, 2003 4:32 am ET
by mellie, shocked by a wanton wanker
you call it a flood
we call it incontinence
you total wanker
Haiku # 25442, January 12, 2003 4:26 am ET
by ash
Sure they had no proof -
The fact he owned his own flat
was enough for them
Haiku # 25441, January 12, 2003 2:32 am ET
by R. of PT
They put him in jail -
because they did not like him -
for about 2 years
Haiku # 25440, January 12, 2003 2:27 am ET
by R. of PT
Kudos to Janis
For preserving First Amend.
I cherish the site
Haiku # 25439, January 11, 2003 9:53 pm ET
by maestro
I wasted a term
Logorrhea misapplied
Flooder's a mere ass.
Haiku # 25438, January 11, 2003 9:44 pm ET
by maestro
all those who employ
most vile, technical techniques
spoil the site for all
Haiku # 25437, January 11, 2003 9:37 pm ET
by maestro
Flooder must suffer
logorrhea most severe
I hope it's fatal.
Haiku # 25436, January 11, 2003 9:34 pm ET
by maestro
Sitting, getting fat,
writing stupid-ass haiku
I'd sure like a life...
Haiku # 25435, January 11, 2003 9:30 pm ET
by dh
I went to the zoo
A man poked me with a stick
That man was a fool
Haiku # 25434, January 11, 2003 8:06 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
I have been drinking
And as such what I write sucks
Just like when sober
Haiku # 25433, January 11, 2003 8:04 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
Flood flood flood flood float
Flood flood flood flood flood flood drown
Flood flood flood flood good
Haiku # 25432, January 11, 2003 8:03 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
I should go to sleep
But I must revise for stuff
Like my PEF
Haiku # 25431, January 11, 2003 8:02 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
A vote for George is
A vote for corruption and
A useless arsehole
Haiku # 25430, January 11, 2003 8:01 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
Must attack Iraq
Saddam has got a moustache
Facial hair is bad
Haiku # 25429, January 11, 2003 8:00 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
Pitiful attempt
Erroneous poet who
Fools none but themselves
Haiku # 25428, January 11, 2003 7:58 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
As such you are like
Head of Sky Robert Maxwell
A bit of a ****
Haiku # 25427, January 11, 2003 7:56 pm ET
by A Student of Manchester
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